Lesson video

Hi there my name is Miss Toole.

And in today's lesson, we are going to be continuing, writing our created story with a focus on making our problem matter.

We're going to start today's lesson with our problem that matter song.

Just to remind us, of our problem matter toolkit, and what we need to include in it.

We're then going to carry on our shared writing from our previous lesson.

And then after we've done our writing, we're to use our five-finger editor to edit your writing and make sure you've got everything that you need to include.

So today you are going to need a piece of paper or exercise book perfectly with lines in, a pencil or a pen, your amazing brain and your wonderful sound.

And if you have got your writing from the previous lesson, that will also help you because we're going to be continuing with our problem and our setback.

So press pause now if you need to go and get your resources.

And then once you have them press play to start with today's learning.

Before we sing our song let's quickly recap what we need in our problem that matters toolkit, to make our writing amazing.

So whether we are focused on a problem that matters, we need to make sure that our reader really cares about our problem.

We need to make sure that the problem is hard to solve.

We don't want to have a character to be able to easily do it 'cause otherwise the reader won't really care about it.

And then when we're writing it down, we need to make sure we're focusing on the characters thoughts, feelings, and actions.

So that is what we included in our problem that matters toolkit song.

So I'm going to sing my song and then I'd lighten you to have a go at singing your song.

Or if you'd like to, you can sing alongside me, but just sing the different word related to your story.

Are you ready to join in? Let's go.

♪ I've got a problem of mine, I care about ♪ ♪ I've got a problem of mine, I care about ♪ ♪ I've got a problem of mine, I care about ♪ ♪ Someone stole my treasure map ♪ ♪ Captain Stonefoot, stole the map ♪ ♪ Captain Stonefoot, stole the map ♪ ♪ Captain Stonefoot, stole the map ♪ ♪ And hid it in his pocket ♪ ♪ I can't find Captain Stonefoot ♪ ♪ I can't find Captain Stonefoot ♪ ♪ I can't find Captain Stonefoot ♪ ♪ What I'm I going to do now ♪ ♪ How will I get my map back ♪ ♪ How will I get my map back ♪ ♪ How will I get my map back ♪ ♪ I'm really upset now ♪ ♪ I'm feeling very determined ♪ ♪ I'm feeling very determined ♪ ♪ I'm feeling very determined ♪ ♪ That I'm going to get my map back ♪ Have a go at singing your problem that matter song and make sure you're including thoughts, feelings and actions, off you go.

Now that you've recapped your problem that matter song, we are going to have a go writing down our problem in our story.

So I've got my box up to help me.

And we're doing it with this part of our box up to help us solve the problem.

So for me, my problem is that Captain Stonefoot steals my treasure map and I feel sad at this.

So you're going to now need your writing pencil or pen and your piece of paper, ready to get going.

Before we start writing our problem, I'm going to quickly recap reading of my opening.

And then I can think about how I'm going to introduce my problem and make sure it matters to the reader.

So let's go.

On an island, far far away, there lived a young pirate called Pirate Pete.

Pirate Pete's family and friends all died while sailing the seven seas.

All that remained was Pirate Pete's father treasure map.

So that was my opening, I have a character, where my story was set and I introduced my object for my problem.

And now we're going to look at writing our problem here.

So for me, my problem on my box up is that my treasure map is stolen by Captain Stonefoot.

Now I'm not just going to write, the treasure map was stolen by Captain Stonefoot, because I want to make it engaging for my reader.

So I'm going to set the scene by saying, one stormy night.

By saying it was a stormy night it already creates, the reader thinking, "Oh! what's happening." So my first opening is one stormy night.

So to start a sentence means capital letter.

One stormy night.

So one stormy night.

And I am now going to introduce this character, my bad character.

So one stormy night Captain Stonefoot and his crew arrived on the island.

Sorry, let me just put my pen down.

Captain Stonefoot and his crew arrived on the island.

That's nine words, so one stormy night, now Captain Stonefoot is his name.

So they need capital letters.

So one stormy night, Captain Stonefoot Captain Stonefoot and his crew.

And, a, nd his crew c, r, ew I'm going to get the ew sound and I haven't worked for this one.

And his crew arrived on the island.

Arrived on the island.

Arrived on, tricky word the, T-H-E on the island.

I'm done with my information, full stop at the end.

One stormy night, Captain Stonefoot and his crew arrived on the island.

So I've started to introduce my problem.

Now, what did Captain Stonefoot do? And his crew.

In my story, they stole Pirate Pete's treasure map.

They stole Pirate Pete's treasure map.

Six words, starting with they and it's capital letter.

They, stole Pirate Pete, remember it's his name, so it needs capital letter.

Pirate Pete's belongs to him so it needs that apostrophe before s Pirate Pete's treasure map.

Full stop.

They stole Pirate Pete's treasure map.

And from my last sentence, I'm going to focus on my feeling.

Pirate Pete was sad.

So new sentence.

Pirate Pete was sad, four words.

Pirate Pete was, tricky word W-A-S sad s, a, d, full stop.

So, I've got one of my feelings in there.

So I'm going to read back what I've just written to check if it makes sense.

One stormy night, Captain Stonefoot and his crew arrived on the island.

They stole Pirate Pete's treasure map.

Pirate Pete was sad.

Have a go now writing your first problem? So think about starting that scene, one stormy night, think about where it happened, who was Captain Stonefoot or maybe you had an ogre or a witch or another animal, and his crew arrived on the island.

They stole, what did they steal? What was important? Pirate Pete was sad; how did your character feel? Think about making that problem matter, how did they feel? So pause now, do your first problem and then come back to me and we can carry on.

Now you will have, your first problem.

So my problem is, a treasure map was stolen.

For you, something else would have been stolen.

And I have mentioned how my character was feeling.

So now I need to think about their thoughts and their actions.

So in my story, Pirate Pete, finds a treasure map which is in Captain Stonefoot's jacket, but I need to get to that part, first.

So I'm going to say, Pirate Pete searched for the pirates, six words.

Pirate Pete searched for the pirates, six words.

So already, capital letter first.

For his name and for the start of the sentence.

Pirate Pete searched for tricky word the, the pirates.

So now I've got my action in there.

What's my character did.

He searched for the pirates.

And what did he find, can you remember? Pirate Pete found footprints that led to a cave.

So he found footprints that led to a cave.

He found footprints that led to a cave.

So starting my sentence with a capital letter.

He, H-E, found footprints that, th at that led, l, e, d to a cave.

C, a, ve, cave.

Full stop.

He found footprints that led to a cave.

What did Pirate Pete see in the cave.

There he saw his map, sticking out on the jacket.

And now this is my second problem, my setback, because the map is sticking out of Captain Stonefoot's jacket.

So now I need to put, there he saw the map in Captain Stonefoot's jacket.

So there, tricky word, T-H-E-R-E there he saw, the, tricky word, map sticking s, t, ick and then that so fix ing sticking out of Captain, capital letter Captain Stonefoot's jacket.

And to finish, I'm going to say what my character was thinking, so there he saw the map, sticking out of Captain Stonefoot's jacket.

What is your character going to be thinking, what are his thought? I'm going to say that Pete is going to think, what am I going to do? So think about our problem that matters song.

He said, "what am I to do? So, what, tricky word, W-H-A-T and use a capital letter 'cause it's following a full stop.

What am I going, go, ing to do? Question mark 'cause I'm asking myself that.

What I'm going to do? he asked.

So I've written my problem and my setback.

I've made my problem matter, because it's a treasure map that belonged to Pirate Pete's dad.

I've made it hard to solve, because I've got all the pirates surrounding Captain Stonefoot and Pirate Pete is on his own.

I have included how my character is feeling.

I've said he's feeling sad.

I've thought about their actions.

He searched for them and followed the footprints to the cave.

And now I've just included what he's thinking.

He's thinking, "what am I going to do?" So now have a go writing the next bit of your problem or your setback, depending on how you did your box up.

And think about our problem and how it matters, and I'm including thoughts, feelings, actions and making sure your problem is hard to solve.

Off you go.

Now you have finished writing your problem.

We're going to have a look at editing our work with our five-finger pop up.

So the first thing we're looking at when reading is capital letters.

Then we're making sure we've got our finger spaces, spelling, full stops and does it make sense.

I'm going to read back my story.

And as I read it, I'm going to be thinking about those five things.

And if I come across anything, I'm just going to correct it in my work.

And then once I've done it with mine, I would like you to have a go at doing it with yours at home, so already.

On an island, far far away there lived a young pirate called Pirate Pete.

Pirate Pete's family and friends all died while sailing the seven seas.

All that remained was Pirate Pete's father treasure map.

One stormy night, Captain Stonefoot and his crew arrived on the island.

They stole Pirate Pete's treasure map.

Pirate Pete was sad.

Pirate Pete searched for the pirates.

He found footprints that led to a cave.

There he saw the map, sticking out of Captain Stonefoot's jacket.

"What am I going to do?" he thought.

So I have all my capital letters in.

I've got all my finger spaces between each word, my spellings are fine.

I've got my full stops and my question marks where needed.

And my story makes sense.

So go back through yours now and check using our five-finger editor.

Off you go.

How did you find writing the next part of your story and editing it with our five-finger editor? I've really enjoyed today's lesson and I'm enjoying putting all our ideas into our story.

Because all the hard part we have done, now makes our story writing a lot easier because we've already thought of the ideas.

We just need to put them in sentences and make sure it makes sense.

So wound on your hard work today, and I hope you are enjoying putting in your ideas into your story.

Now that we've nearly finished our story, we've only got our solution on ending to write in the next lesson.

I want you start thinking about title for your story.

So my story is going to be called "Pirate Pete and The Treasure Map." 'Cause it doesn't give too much away, but also let's the reader know a little bit about my story.

So your task is to think about the title for your story and have that ready for the next lesson in this unit.

Thank you for your hard work today.

Well done and I'll see you later.

Bye.