Lesson video

Hi, everybody, I'm Miss Gardner.

Welcome to your next lesson from our "The Day the Crayons Quit" unit: Reading and writing persuasive letters.

I hope you've been enjoying this unit as much as I have and I'm really looking forward to today's learning because we are going to do some writing.

So you will need a copy of this book, "The Day The Crayons Quit" by Drew Daywalt.

So if you need to, you can pause the video and go and get the book ahead of the lesson.

Great.

Hopefully now we all have access to the book, which means we are ready to get started with today's learning.

So let's get going.

In today's lesson from our "The Day the Crayons Quit" unit, we are going to be using our plan from the previous lesson to help us write the first paragraph of our persuasive letter.

So the learning outcome is: I can write the first paragraph of a persuasive letter.

Let's start by looking at the keywords.

We'll do my turn, your turn: present tense, first person, complex sentence, text flow.

Let's have a look at what these mean.

So present tense tells the reader that action is happening now.

First person is the "I/we" perspective.

A complex sentence is a sentence formed by at least one main clause and a subordinate clause.

And text flow is how a text is written to keep the reader engaged.

So there are two sections of our lesson today.

In the first, will be preparing to write and in the second section will be writing the first paragraph of our persuasive letter.

So let's start with preparing to write.

This persuasive letter can be structured like this: a salutation.

So when we say Dear, the owner of the crayons.

Paragraph one, paragraph two, and then a sign-off.

In this lesson we are writing paragraph one.

When we write, we always try to do these things: Plan and say each sentence before we write it.

Use punctuation where we know the rules.

Showcase each sentence type we know.

So, simple, compound, complex.

Write letters neatly on the line in jointed handwriting.

Use spelling strategies to spell words accurately, and check and improve our writing when we think we have finished.

So we are going to be writing a persuasive letter written from the first person perspective of a crayon in "The Day the Crayons Quit".

First person perspective is the point of view where the writer is the I character.

You are writing in character as the red crayon.

You're not writing as yourself.

You are getting into character and pretending to be the red character, the red crayon.

So you will use pronouns like I, me, we because you are writing in the first person.

So let's review the notes from a plan that we can include in our first paragraph.

We started with an exaggeration, "Most shattered crayon in the entire world." "Worn out because used every day including holidays." So giving an opinion and a reason.

"Shaking with exhaustion," so show and tell language.

And then a rhetorical question: "Can you please use another colour?" So you can see these are not written in full sentences 'cause there are notes from our plan.

But we will be using them to help us write full sentences in today's lesson.

So in this paragraph that we're writing today, you are going to explain how you, the red character, are feeling, and why.

This paragraph needs to include the following for text flow: salutation at the start, ambitious vocabulary, fronted adverbials, simple, compound, and complex sentences, present tense, we are writing our persuasive letter in the present tense.

And this includes simple present, progressive present and perfect present.

So let's recap the present tense.

The present tense can be written in the simple, perfect or progressive form.

Let's have a look.

So in the simple present, you use only one main verb.

For example, I am, you use, he/she/it feels am, use, feels, those are your verb.

In the perfect present tense, you use have or has.

And then your past tense main verb.

This shows that something has started in the past but it has still connected to now.

So I have been, you have used, he/she/it has felt.

You could say "I have been exhausted this week." The perfect present shows that although it started, you started feeling exhausted in the past, you are still feeling exhausted now.

Then the progressive present has a am, is, or are, auxiliary verb, plus a main verb which ends in ing.

So I am being, you are using, he/she/it is feeling.

And the present progressive shows that the verb is ongoing, it is still happening now.

So checking for understanding.

Which form of the present tense is each sentence written in? A: I have felt like this for weeks now.

B: I am feeling exhausted, just exhausted.

C: I feel terrible.

Remember to look at the verb to help you work out what form of the present tense the sentence is written in.

Pause the video now.

Okay, so A, this sentence uses have plus the past tense main verb felt.

"I have felt." So it is in the perfect present tense.

B: This sentence uses "am" plus the ing main verb, feeling.

"I am feeling." So it is in the progressive present tense.

And C: "I feel terrible." This sentence uses only one main verb, feel.

So it is the simple present tense.

Well done, everybody.

So a persuasive letter is written mainly in the present tense.

Where is the present tense used in this sentence? And can you spot what form of the present tense it is written in? "I have been shattered all week and I cannot remember the last time I had a day off." Pause the video now and see if you can spot which form of the present tense this sentence is written in.

Okay, so hopefully you notice that we actually have two forms of the present tense In this sentence: "I have been" is in the perfect present tense, and "I cannot" is in the simple present tense.

Sentences often use different forms of the same tense so that they sound right, and you can hear if they sound right and check if they sound right by saying them out loud.

So checking for understanding.

Which sentence uses the simple present and the perfect present tense? A: I was exhausted and I was ready for a day off.

B: I have been exhausted and I am ready for a day off.

Or C: I am feeling exhausted and I will be ready for a day off.

Pause the video now.

Okay.

So the sentence which used the simple present and the perfect present was B.

"I have been" is your perfect present and "I am" is your simple present.

Well done, everybody.

A persuasive letter though can also use the progressive present tense.

For example: "As I am writing this, I am shaking with exhaustion." "I am writing" is in the progressive present tense.

"I am shaking" is also in the progressive present tense.

The progressive present tense shows that an action is ongoing, it's still going on.

These emotions are happening right now.

So checking for understanding.

Which sentence uses the progressive present tense? A: I feel worn out.

B: I am feeling pretty fed up or C: I have been feeling shattered this week.

Pause the video now.

That's right, it is B; "I am feeling" is in the progressive present tense.

And you can tell that because it has the am verb from to be.

And then your main verb, feel, has ing at the end.

"I am feeling." Well done.

So this paragraph also needs to include persuasive techniques: such as rhetorical question, exaggeration, opinion and reason, command and warning.

We have all these ideas jotted down on our plans so we can make sure we are using our plans to help us when it comes to writing.

But you might write these in different sentence types, simple, compound, complex.

Let's have a look though at specifically complex sentences.

A complex sentence is formed of a main clause stretched with an aerial subordinate clause that starts with a subordinating conjunction.

So your complex sentence has a main clause, a subordinating conjunction like because, as, when, and then a subordinate adverbial clause.

This forms a complex sentence.

So let's look at a main clause and an adverbial clause.

"As I am writing this letter", that is an adverbial subordinate clause.

It doesn't make sense by itself and it starts with the subordinating conjunction "as".

"I am feeling completely shattered." That is a main clause.

It makes sense by itself.

The subordinating conjunction "as" is used to show when two ideas are happening at the same time.

Let's have a look.

"As I am writing this letter, I am feeling completely shattered." So you have your subordinating conjunction "as" at the start of your subordinate clause, you adverbial subordinate clause, then you have a comma after your subordinate clause and then you have your main clause.

You could though, add extra detail into this complex sentence.

"As I am writing this letter, I am feeling the most shattered I have ever been." So you can see there what kind of persuasive technique have I added in? Have a think.

That's right.

I've added in some exaggeration.

"Most" and "Ever" are in capital letters so we know that they're supposed to be emphasised.

I'm also saying "most shattered" rather than just shattered is a superlative adjective, which is a very effective persuasive technique.

So checking for understanding.

This is a complex sentence.

True or false? "I'm exhausted and I need a break." Pause the video now.

That is false.

Can you use A or B to justify your answer? A: A complex sentence is formed of two main clauses and a subordinating conjunction, or B: This is a compound sentence.

It is formed of two main clauses and a coordinating conjunction.

Pause the video now.

That is B.

"I am exhausted" is a main clause.

"I need a break" is another main clause, "and" is a coordinating conjunction, so this is a compound sentence.

Well done.

So it's time for Task A.

You need to say the first two to three sentences of your persuasive letter, because we know it's so important to say our sentences out loud before we write them down.

Try to include the following: a complex sentence, an exaggeration, and present tense verbs.

If you want to, you can use this sentence scaffold to help you: "Dear Owner," because we want to include our salutation as well.

"Dear Owner, I have been blank all week.

I cannot remember the last time blank.

As I'm writing this, I am blank.

So pause the video now and off you go saying your first sentences of your persuasive letter.

Well done, everybody.

Okay.

Just think about the sentences you just said.

Did you include a complex sentence? Did you include exaggeration? Did you speak in the present tense? I'm going to read my sentences out loud, and as I'm doing that you can be reading along with me and checking I've included those three points.

"Dear Owner, I have been the most exhausted crayon this week.

I cannot remember the last time I had a day off.

As I'm writing this, I am shaking with exhaustion." So, did I include a complex sentence? My final sentence was, "As I am writing this," subordinate clause, "I am shaking with exhaustion." Main clause.

Did I include exaggeration? I said "most exhausted" and I said it in capital letters.

And I didn't just say exhausted, I said "the most exhausted", a superlative adjective.

And was I speaking in the present tense? I said "I have been", so the perfect present, "I cannot", the simple present, and "I am writing", "I am shaking", the progressive present.

So three different forms of the present tense.

Thank you for helping me check.

If you need to pause your video and have another go at saying these sentences again, you can.

Otherwise, really well done, everybody.

It is time for the second section of our lesson where we are writing our persuasive letter.

This is the success criteria that we will use to write today.

Let's go through it.

I have written in the first person and present tense, I have written a sentence with exaggeration, I have written a rhetorical question, and I have written a complex sentence.

So you're going to use this to help you make sure you include everything you need to in this paragraph.

So these are the points you will make in this paragraph: You'll say about how you're the most shattered crayon in the world.

So maybe you'll use some exaggeration.

You'll explain why you are so tired because you are used every day and so you're feeling worn out.

So an opinion and a reason there.

Shaking with exhaustion.

Maybe some show and tell language.

And then a rhetorical question.

Can you please use another colour? You're not gonna worry about command or warning just yet.

We're gonna save that for the second paragraph.

So first, I'm going to write the salutation and the first few sentences of my persuasive letter.

And you will help me check that I've used the success criteria.

So let's have a go at writing these sentences together.

Okay, so I've started by neatly sticking in my success criteria.

I'm just going to go through it one more time so I'm really sure about what I need to include in this paragraph.

I have written in the first person and present tense.

I have written a sentence with exaggeration.

I have written a rhetorical question and I have written a complex sentence and I have my plan next to me to be able to refer to as well.

So I've started by writing my salutation, "Dear Owner," with a comma.

And then I've indented and I've written my first word, "I".

"Dear Owner, I think I must be.

." Hmm? I'm going to look at my plan to help me finish this sentence.

"The most shattered crayon in the entire world." Yeah, I'm gonna start with an exaggeration to have a really powerful start to my persuasive letter.

"I think I must be.

." Hmm, now it's not a full sentence in my plan.

"Most shattered".

So I need to remember that.

So I'm gonna say my sentence to check it makes sense.

"I think I must be most shattered"? No, I must be the most shattered.

"I think I must be the.

." and I'm gonna make sure I do my capital, my word "most" in capital letters because I want to emphasise it.

"The most shattered." Can anyone remember what it's called when we don't just say "shattered", we say "the most shattered."? What kind of adjective is that? It's a superlative adjective.

Well remembered.

So, "I think I must be the most shattered crayon in the.

." And I'm gonna, again, I'm gonna capitalise entire world.

So it's an exaggerated word, "entire world." It's the end of my sentence, so I can either do a full stop or an exclamation mark.

I think I'm gonna choose an exclamation mark here.

Okay, now I want to talk about how I have felt and why I'm so exhausted.

So I'm looking at my plan and I said that I felt worn out because used every day including holidays.

And I can see that by using the word "because", the subordinating conjunction "because", I'll be able to tick off complex sentence from my success criteria.

So, "I.

." Worn out.

I'm thinking about what tense I want to use here.

I could say I feel worn out, but I want to show that it's not just now that I've been feeling worn out.

It started a while ago and I'm still feeling worn out.

So I'm going to use the perfect present tense.

"I have felt worn out." Worn out is a synonym for exhausted.

"I have felt worn out." This week? Yes.

I'm going to be specific.

"This week." Or this year, actually.

Because if you remember about the red character, it was used every day including the holidays, wasn't it? So "I have felt worn out this year, because.

." I have my subordinating conjunction.

And actually I'm gonna say the word "you" now.

So I'm speaking directly to the reader.

"You have used me every day." I could do that in capital letters as well if I wanted to.

"including the holidays." Now this is the end of my sentence.

So what do I need? If it's the end of my sentence, everybody.

I need a.

? Full stop.

Exactly.

Okay, now, just looking at my plan.

Now I want to use a rhetorical question because I want to make the reader pause and reflect and think about my point.

Can you please use another colour? Yeah, I think I'm going to say that.

"Can you please.

." And by using the word please, I'm still being quite polite, which is probably helpful in being, in persuading the owner to change their mind and change their ways.

"Can you please use another colour?" Oh, I nearly forgot.

This is a rhetorical question.

So even though I don't expect the reader to answer it, it is still a question.

So what punctuation do we need at the end? We need a question mark.

Excellent.

Let's just read back and check that makes sense.

"Can you please use another colour?" I think you can probably spot the mistake I've made.

Because what does every sentence need to start with? We need a capital letter.

Exactly.

Can.

"Can you please use another colour?" Hmm.

My spelling doesn't look quite right.

"Anover", I'm thinking about my phonics and the th sound is made using T-H.

So I spelled that wrong.

So I'm going to neatly rewrite it above with a T-H, "another colour." Okay, I'm going to leave this here now because I'm just writing the first few sentences.

You'll be able to write a little bit more of this paragraph by yourself afterwards.

So let's just go through the success criteria.

I have written in the first person and present tense.

Definitely.

I've got I, I, I, me, that's all first person.

And present tense.

I have simple present, "I think", I have perfect present, "I have felt", "have used", that's perfect present.

I haven't used progressive present.

So that's something I might be thinking about if I were to carry on writing.

But yes, I can give myself a tick.

I have written a sentence with exaggeration.

I said "most shattered" and "entire".

These were all capitalised words.

And I did a superlative adjective for "most shattered".

So yes, I've used exaggeration.

Have I written a rhetorical question? I asked, "Can you please use another colour?" And I remembered my question mark, so I can give myself a tick.

And then have I written a complex sentence? I did when I explained my reason about the way I'm feeling.

I said "I have felt worn out." That was my opinion, my feeling, "this year, because you have used me every day, including the holidays." So "because you have used me every day, including the holidays," is a subordinate clause.

So I have a complex sentence there.

So I can give myself a tick.

I'm going to stop there.

And you are going to be able to write your own paragraph soon, independently thinking about including everything you need to from the plan and your success criteria.

Okay, it is time for Task B.

Now it is your turn to write.

So first, you need to write your salutation.

Then you'll need to indent the first sentence.

Then you'll use your success criteria and your plan to help you structure your paragraph.

So pause the video now and off you go writing your first paragraph of your persuasive letter.

Okay, welcome back, everybody.

Well done.

In a moment, you're going to read your writing back to check for sense, so check it makes sense and if there's any errors.

Then you'll tick the success criteria as you find an example of each part of it like in this example.

So I'm going to read it out loud and then we'll check if I can tick everything off the success criteria.

"Dear Owner, I have been completely shattered all week! I must be the most overused crayon in the entire world! I am feeling especially exhausted because you have used me during the holidays.

Every day, you pick me up when you want to colour something in.

On Monday, it was an apple.

On Tuesday, it was a bus.

On Wednesday, you even used me to colour in a banana! Can you please use another colour?" So, I have written in the first person and present tense.

I have done that.

I've got lots of examples of "I" and "me" and present tense.

"I have been", perfect present.

"I am feeling", progressive present.

So different types of present tense too.

So I give myself a tick.

I have written a sentence with exaggeration.

I have, I said "I must be the most overused crayon in the entire world!" So I capitalised words and I used superlative adjectives, so I can give myself a tick.

I have written a rhetorical question.

I said at the end, "Can you please use another colour?" So I gave myself a tick.

And I have written a complex sentence.

I have.

I said, "I am feeling especially exhausted because you have used me during the holidays." So I gave an opinion and a reason in a complex sentence.

So I can give myself a tick.

I also, and it wasn't on my success criteria, tried to include some fronted adverbials: "every day", "on Monday", "on Tuesday", "on Wednesday".

So I repeated those to emphasise a point, and I made sure I remembered my comma after a fronted adverbial too.

So now, you need to pause the video, read back through your writing and check your success criteria too.

Pause the video now, and off you go.

Super job, everybody.

Well done.

Here is a summary of everything we've learned today: A persuasive letter is written mainly in the present tense, including the simple, progressive and perfect forms. A complex sentence is formed of a main clause stretched with an adverbial subordinate clause that starts with a subordinating conjunction.

Persuasive letters have distinctive linguistic features in order to achieve their purpose.

And first person perspective is the point of view where the writer is the "I" character, providing a personal account of events or experiences.

Well done, everybody.

Great job.