Hi everyone.

My name is Ms. Boyle and welcome to this lesson where you are going to be writing the second diary entry based on "The Firework-Maker's Daughter." This lesson is based on this copy of "The Firework-Maker's Daughter" by Philip Pullman and you may wish to refer to it.

Pause the video and get your copy of the book now.

Great, now you have your copy with you.

During this lesson, you'll need to be listening and looking carefully and there'll be tasks where you need somebody to talk to.

You will need your plan for your diary entry and you will need a piece of paper and pen or pencil to write your diary entry.

I hope you're feeling excited and ready to learn.

Let's get started.

The learning outcome for today's lesson is, I can write my second diary entry from the perspective of Lila.

Here are our key words for today's lesson.

Let's practise saying them.

My turn, your turn.

Subordinating conjunction.

Adverbial complex sentence.

Rhetorical question.

Great job, well done.

Let's take a look at their definitions.

A subordinating conjunction is a word that starts an adverbial clause.

An adverbial complex sentence is a sentence formed of a main clause and an adverbial subordinate clause.

A rhetorical question is a question asked to the reader that does not expect an answer.

There are two parts to today's lesson.

In the first part, we will be preparing to write and in the second part, you will be writing your diary entry.

So let's begin with preparing to write.

You are going to be writing your second diary entry from the perspective of Lila in "The Firework-Maker's Daughter." The second diary entry is written at this point in time: Lila has decided to go on a quest to the Volcano of Merapi.

Your diary entry will follow this structure: You will write the date and the greeting.

Paragraph one will provide a recount of discovering that Lila's father told Chulak the secret.

Paragraph two will provide a recount of Lila's decision to leave and writing a letter to her father.

And then, you will finish with a sign-off.

Your diary entry needs to include the following linguistic features: Subordinating conjunctions to form an adverbial complex sentence.

Rhetorical questions.

And a shift from past to present tense.

Linguistic features are types of words and language that a writer chooses carefully.

Each paragraph of your diary entry will involve shifting from past tense to present tense.

This will enable you to explain an experience or action that has already happened and how you are currently feeling.

We can use the notes from our plan to form full sentences.

Using a range of sentences in our writing helps it to flow.

Here are some example notes from a plan for this diary entry.

What happened? Chulak saw how upset I was, wanted to help.

Thoughts and feelings: Felt frustrated and hopeless, wanted to know the secret.

An example sentence I might write using these notes is, when Chulak saw how upset I was, he wanted to help me discover the secret to firework-making.

Here, I have used the subordinating conjunction when to form an adverbial clause.

I have then separated my adverbial clause from my main clause with a comma.

When Chulak saw how upset I was, he wanted to help me discover the secret to firework-making.

This is an example of an adverbial complex sentence.

The subordinating conjunction allows us to join the adverbial clause to a main clause to make an adverbial complex sentence.

An adverbial clause is a type of subordinate clause and it can come at the beginning of our sentence and be separated from the main clause by a comma.

Let's look at that sentence again.

When Chulak saw how upset I was, he wanted to help me discover the secret to firework-making.

When is my subordinating conjunction used to begin my clause.

The subordinate clause can also come after the main clause and you do not need a comma to separate it here.

Chulak wanted to help me discover the secret to firework-making when he saw how upset I was.

The subordinating conjunction when is still used to begin my adverbial clause.

The adverbial clause relies on the main clause to make sense.

Let's check your understanding.

True or false? The subordinating conjunction always comes at the beginning of an adverbial complex sentence.

Pause the video and select your answer now.

That is false, well done.

Can you justify your answer? A, the subordinating conjunction always comes after the main clause or B, the subordinating conjunction always begins the adverbial clause.

Pause the video and select your justification.

The answer is B, well done.

The subordinating conjunction always begins the adverbial clause and the adverbial clause can come at the beginning of the sentence before the main clause or it can come after the main clause.

A range of subordinating conjunctions can be used to begin an adverbial clause.

Each is used for a different purpose.

Subordinating conjunctions you can use are: When, that, because, so, as, these three subordinating conjunctions will be useful for your writing and they have different purposes.

When, so, that, let's take a look at the purpose of each.

When means at the time.

So is used to show an effect.

And that adds detail to the main clause.

Let's take a look at an example sentence using each of these subordinating conjunctions.

When Chulak returned, he told me what my father had said.

So here, we can see that Lila would be saying, At the time, Chulak returned, he told her what her father had said.

I decided to go to Merapi so I could uncover the secret.

Here, we can see that Lila wants to go to Merapi for the effect of uncovering the secret.

I wrote to my father a letter that explained my decision to leave.

Here, detail has been added about what was in the letter.

Let's check your understanding.

Select the appropriate subordinating conjunction for the following sentences: Your subordinating conjunctions are: when, so, and that.

A, I wrote to my father a letter, he would know how betrayed I felt.

B, I got home, I packed a bag with everything I needed.

C, I have decided to go on a quest, will definitely be challenging.

Pause the video and select the correct subordinating conjunction for each sentence now.

Let's take a look at the answers.

A, I wrote to my father a letter so he would know how betrayed I felt.

B, When I got home I packed a bag with everything I needed.

And C, I have decided to go on a quest that will definitely be challenging.

Well done for showing a great understanding of the different subordinating conjunctions you can use to form adverbial complex sentences.

Rhetorical questions are a common feature of diary entries.

A rhetorical question is a question posed that is not intended to be answered.

In a diary entry, a rhetorical question is used to convey strong emotions.

Let's look at some examples of rhetorical questions that Lila might write.

How could my own father do this to me? This rhetorical question conveys feeling betrayed, shocked, angered.

Another example is, what should I do? This rhetorical question conveys feeling confused, conflicted, lost.

Let's check your understanding.

True or false? Rhetorical questions are used to get other's opinions.

Pause the video and select your answer now.

That is false, well done.

Now it's time to justify your answer.

A, a rhetorical question is not meant to be answered.

It conveys thoughts and emotions.

Or B, a rhetorical question is answered by the writer.

Pause the video and select your justification.

The answer is A, well done.

A rhetorical question is not meant to be answered.

It conveys thoughts and emotions.

It is important to be able to shift between past and present tense in a diary entry.

This allows you to recount an experience or action that took place in the past and say how you are currently feeling as a result of it.

Let's take a look at an example of this.

I wrote to my father a letter that explains my decision to leave.

I am sure he will be crushed, but that is not my problem! As I write this, I am full of excitement and nerves.

Can you spot where this extract shifts into the present tense? Pause the video and see if you can spot it now.

Hopefully you spotted that the first sentence began in past tense.

I wrote, here, past tense has been used to recount an action that happened in the past.

And then in the second sentence it switches into present tense.

I am sure he will be crushed.

The final sentence is also in present tense.

As I write this, I am full of excitement and nerves.

Present tense has been used to communicate current thoughts and emotions.

Let's check your understanding.

Which of the following sentences are written in the present tense to convey current emotions and thoughts? A, I was shocked to learn my father had told Chulak the secret.

B, I feel utterly betrayed by my father.

C, I packed a bag with everything I needed.

D, there is so much that remains unknown about the journey ahead.

Pause the video and select your answers now.

The answers are B, I feel utterly betrayed by my father, and D, there is so much that remains unknown about the journey ahead.

Well done.

It's now time for a task and it is a talk task to get you ready for your writing.

Say the first few sentences of Lila's diary entry.

Make sure you include the following: A subordinating conjunction to form an adverbial complex sentence.

Use of a rhetorical question.

And a shift from past to present tense to convey current feelings.

Your starting sentence could be, Dear Diary, When.

Comma.

End sentence.

This sentence stem will help you form an adverbial complex sentence.

The subordinating conjunction when has been used at the beginning of the sentence, which starts an adverbial clause and your main clause would follow your comma.

Pause the video and do the talk task now.

Welcome back.

I really enjoyed listening to your oral rehearsal of the beginning of Lila's diary entry and you did a great job at including the linguistic features.

Let's take a look at a good example together.

When Chulak saw how upset I was, he went to visit my father to find out the secret for me.

The last thing I expected was for my dad to actually tell him! Why would he tell Chulak and not his own daughter? I can't believe my father would do this to me.

I feel utterly betrayed.

Well, I will show him! We can see that the first sentence here is an example of an adverbial complex sentence.

The subordinating conjunction when has been used to begin the clause, when Chulak saw how upset I was and the main clause, he went to visit my father to find out the secret for me, comes after the comma.

Use of a rhetorical question.

We can see, why would he tell Chulak and not his own daughter? And a shift from past to present tense to convey current feelings.

We can see that it shifts into present tense after the rhetorical question.

I can't believe, I feel utterly betrayed.

Well done for preparing to write.

It's now time for the most exciting part of the lesson where you are going to write your diary entry.

When we write, we always try to do these things: Plan and say each sentence before we write it.

Use punctuation where we know the rules.

Vary our sentence types.

Write letters neatly on the line in joined handwriting.

Sound out words to spell them accurately.

Read our sentences out loud to check they make sense and edit to improve our writing if necessary.

Here is the success criteria for your writing today.

Let's read over it together.

I have written in the first person perspective as Lila.

I have used a subordinating conjunction when, so, or that to form at least one adverbial complex sentence.

I have expressed thoughts and feelings including at least one rhetorical question.

I have shifted between past and present tense to explain what has happened and current thoughts and feelings.

You should use your plan to help you structure your writing today.

Paragraph one will provide a recount of discovering that Lila's father told Chulak the secret.

You have a plan with notes about what happened and thoughts and feelings linked to this.

Paragraph two will provide a recount of Lila's decision to leave and writing her father a letter.

You also have a plan with notes about what happened and thoughts and feelings linked to this.

Pause the video and make sure you have your plan with you now.

I am going to share with you a model of the beginning of Lila's second diary entry using my plan and then I'm going to need your help checking my writing against the success criteria.

Friday the 23rd of January 2024.

Dear Diary, When I told Chulak how frustrated I was with my father, he offered to help.

The last thing I expected was for my father to tell Chulak the secret.

How could he do this to his own daughter? I am furious with him.

Let's take a look at the success criteria.

I have written in the first person perspective as Lila.

I have used a subordinating conjunction, when, so, or that, to form at least one adverbial complex sentence.

I have expressed thoughts and feelings including at least one rhetorical question.

And I have shifted between past and present tense to explain what has happened and current thoughts and feelings.

Pause the video and check my writing against the success criteria now.

See if you can spot where I've met each point.

You were fantastic at spotting where I'd used each linguistic feature.

Let's go over this together.

For I have written in the first person perspective as Lila, you noticed I use the first person pronoun I, throughout.

So we can tick that.

For I have used a subordinating conjunction to form at least one adverbial complex sentence, you spotted that I use the subordinating conjunction, when, to begin the adverbial clause when I told Chulak how frustrated I was with my father and the main clause that followed was, he offered to help.

So we can tick that.

For I have expressed thoughts and feelings including at least one rhetorical question.

The rhetorical question was, how could he do this to his own daughter? And the feeling was, I am furious with him.

So we can tick that.

And the shift from past to present tense comes right at the end where it says, I am furious with him.

So we can tick that too.

It's now time for you to begin writing your diary entry.

Use your plan and the success criteria to write the first paragraph of your diary entry.

Paragraph one will provide a recount of discovering Lila's father told Chulak the secret.

Remember to refer to the success criteria.

Begin by writing the date and the greeting, Dear Diary.

Pause the video and do the task now.

Welcome back.

Well done for your hard work and concentration, writing the beginning of your diary entry.

Let's take a look at a model example.

Friday the 23rd of January 2024.

Dear Diary, When Chulak saw how upset I was, he went to visit my father to find out the secret for me.

The last thing I expected was for my dad to actually tell him! Why would he tell Chulak and not his own daughter? I can't believe my father would do this to me.

I feel utterly betrayed.

Well, I will show him! Let's check this against the success criteria I have written in the first person perspective as Lila, we can see words like I, my, and me.

So we can tick that.

I have used a subordinating conjunction, when, so, or that to form at least one adverbial complex sentence.

My first sentence begins with a subordinating conjunction to form an adverbial clause.

When Chulak saw how upset I was, he went to visit my father to find out the secret for me.

So we can tick that.

I have expressed thoughts and feelings, including at least one rhetorical question.

I can see the rhetorical question, why would he tell Chulak and not his own daughter? And I can see the sentence, I feel utterly betrayed.

So we can tick that.

And for I have shifted between past and present tense to explain what has happened and current thoughts and feelings.

We can see past tense verbs like saw and went, and expected at the beginning of the diary entry.

And then to towards the end, it shifts into present tense to express feelings, I can't believe and I feel utterly betrayed.

So we can tick that.

Pause the video now read over your writing and check it against the success criteria.

Well done for reflecting on your writing.

It's now time to write the rest of your diary entry.

Use your plan and the success criteria to write the second paragraph of your diary entry.

The second paragraph needs to provide a recount of Lila's decision to leave and writing the letter to her father.

Remember to refer to the success criteria and include a sign off at the end of your diary entry.

Pause the video and do the task now.

Welcome back.

Well done for completing your diary entry.

Let's go over a model together.

I have decided to venture to the volcano of Merapi all by myself so I can discover the secret to firework-making.

I am going to exceed my father in his own craft! I wrote him a letter that explains my decision.

I am sure he will be crushed, but what else did he expect? As I write this, I am full of excitement and nerves.

There is so much I don't know about the journey ahead, but I am certain of one thing.

I must go on this quest in pursuit of my dream.

I will become the finest firework-maker in the land.

Until next time, Lila.

Let's check this model against the success criteria.

I have written in the first person perspective as Lila.

We can see words like myself and I, and my, so we can tick that.

I have used a subordinating conjunction to form at least one adverbial complex sentence.

We can see that in the first sentence, the subordinating conjunction, so, has been used to stretch the main clause.

I have decided to venture to the volcano of Merapi all by myself so I can discover the secret to firework-making.

So we can tick that.

I have expressed thoughts and feelings, including at least one rhetorical question.

We can see the rhetorical question, I am sure he will be crushed, but what else did he expect? And the feeling, I am full of excitement and nerves.

So we can tick that.

And for I have shifted between past and present tense to explain what has happened and current thoughts and feelings.

We can see that at the beginning, there are past tense verbs like wrote, to recount an action that's happened in the past, but the writing then shifts into present tense to convey current emotions and feelings.

As I write this, I am full of excitement and nerves.

I'm certain of one thing.

So we can tick that.

Pause the video now and read over the rest of your diary entry and check it against the success criteria.

You can make any edits and improvements you need to.

Well done for reflecting on your diary entry and checking it includes all of the linguistic features you needed.

We've now come to the end of our lesson, so let's go over a summary together.

We use notes from our plan to form a range of sentence types.

Diary entries shift between the past and present tense to explain what has happened and convey current thoughts and feelings.

Subordinating conjunctions are used to begin an adverbial clause.

An adverbial clause is joined with a main clause to form an adverbial complex sentence.

Rhetorical questions are an effective way to convey thoughts and emotions in a diary entry.

I am so proud of your hard work writing this diary entry, and I have really enjoyed teaching you.