Lesson video

Hi everyone and welcome back to our unit on the Titanic.

Today we're going to be writing the second recount paragraph of our journalistic report.

In today's lesson, you will be writing the second recount paragraph of a journalistic report about the Titanic.

In today's learning, we're going to be using the following key words.

Complex sentence adverbial complex sentence, non-finite complex sentence, relative complex sentence.

Well done.

A complex sentence is formed of at least one main clause and a subordinate clause.

An adverbial complex sentence is formed of a main clause and an adverbial subordinate clause.

A non-finite complex sentence is formed of a main clause and a non-finite subordinate clause, and a relative complex sentence is formed of a main clause and a relative subordinate clause.

Today we're going to be writing the second recount paragraph of a journalistic report about the Titanic.

Firstly, we're going to be preparing to write, and then we'll move on to writing the second recount paragraph.

The layout of a journalistic report can look like this.

We start with a headline.

Then the opening gives the reader some general information about the event.

The recount section gives specific details that tell the reader about the event.

The quote section includes quotes from the people who know more about the event and the closing describes what is currently happening and what is likely to happen next.

So far in our unit, we've already written the opening.

We've also already written the first paragraph of the recount section.

Today we are writing the second paragraph of the recount section.

The purpose is the aim of the text, and the purpose of the recount section is to engage the reader and give the reader specific information about the topic.

The paragraph follows a clear structure.

We begin with an introductory sentence, which introduces what the paragraph will be about.

Then we follow that with some specific information, which gives the reader detailed information about an aspect of the topic.

And finally, we end our paragraph with a linking sentence, which links onto the next paragraph.

The purpose of the recount section is to: pause the video while you decide.

Well done if you spotted that the purpose of the recount section is to engage the reader and give the reader specific facts.

Throughout this unit, we've been developing our knowledge of different types of complex sentences.

A complex sentence is a sentence formed of at least one main clause and a subordinate clause.

There are three types of complex sentence that we have been learning.

An adverbial complex sentence, a non-finite complex sentence and a relative complex sentence.

Match the types of complex sentences to their examples and pause the video while you do that.

Well done if you spotted that an adverbial complex sentence is a sentence formed of a main clause and an adverbial subordinate clause.

A non-finite complex sentence is a sentence formed of a main clause and a non-finite subordinate clause.

And a relative complex sentence is a sentence formed of a main clause and a relative subordinate clause.

All complex sentences include at least one main clause and a subordinate clause.

Now it's time for your task.

Match the complex sentence types to their examples.

So we have just defined what is an adverbial, a non-finite, and a relative complex sentence.

And now your task is to identify the examples of each sentence type.

Pause the video while you do that.

Well done everyone if you spotted that an adverbial complex would be this one, let's read it together.

Although third class tickets do not grant access to all facilities, those travelling in the third class can enjoy the use of several spacious, comfortable public rooms. The non-finite complex sentence was overlooking the ocean, first-class cabins are situated on the ship's top deck.

And finally, we know this one is a relative complex sentence.

Let's read it together.

Titanic, which has 10 decks, has been furnished to the highest standard.

Now, circle the subordinate clause in each of these complex sentences and pause the video while you do that.

Great work, everyone.

Well done if you spotted that which has 10 decks is the relative subordinate clause.

We know it's a relative subordinate clause because it begins with the relative pronoun, which.

Although third class tickets do not grant access to all facilities is an example of an adverbial subordinate clause.

And we know this because it begins with that subordinating conjunction, although.

And finally, overlooking the ocean is a non-finite subordinate clause because it begins with that verb in the progressive form, overlooking and we know it's in the progressive form because it ends with that -ing suffix.

Okay, everyone.

Now we are going to move on to writing the second recount paragraph of our report.

When we write, we always try to do these things.

We plan and say each sentence before we write it.

We use punctuation where we know the rules.

We showcase each sentence type we know.

We write letters neatly on the line in joined handwriting.

We use spelling strategies to spell words accurately, and we check and improve our writing when we think we have finished.

Here's our success criteria for today.

Let's read them through together.

I have included journalistic language and subject-specific vocabulary.

I have included an adverbial complex sentence.

I have included a non-finite complex sentence.

I have included a relative complex sentence.

So as you can probably tell in this piece of writing, we're really gonna be focusing on variation of our sentence types.

We're gonna use our plans to write our recount section, and we're going to build on our ideas from our plans when we are writing today.

Make sure you've got your plan with you ready for writing.

Let's just recap the structure of this paragraph in the recount section.

Firstly, we've got our introductory sentence, which introduces what the paragraph will be about.

Then we follow with some specific information, sentences that give the reader detailed facts about aspects of the event.

And finally, we end with our linking sentence, which links onto the next paragraph.

We're gonna start with our introductory sentence.

This introduces what the paragraph will be about, and we need to make sure that we are using the relevant parts of our plan.

Here is my plan on the screen, but take a moment for you to reread your plan.

Now, before we start, you are going to actually help me write my second recount paragraph.

Okay, everybody.

So I have set up my page.

I've stuck in my success criteria.

I've also already written my topic sentence as well as it's widely celebrated structural design, Titanic's magnificent interiors have gained much admiration on the world's stage.

Now I'm happy with this because I've linked back to my previous paragraph with this opener, as well it's widely celebrated structural design, but also from reading this, my reader will understand that now we're going to be talking about the interiors.

Now I have to remember that as a journalist, I've not actually been on the Titanic.

I've just heard that it's magnificent.

That it's interiors are magnificent.

So I'm actually going to edit in the word allegedly, because I don't know this from firsthand experience.

I've just heard that the interiors are magnificent.

Okay, so there I've written my topic sentence.

Now I'm moving on to my specific information, which is gonna be across a few sentences.

I'm thinking about my success criteria.

I want to showcase a range of different complex sentence types.

So I'm going to think about the facilities on board.

Just looking at my plan, I've mentioned that there's a gym or a gymnasium, is how I'm gonna write it to make it more formal, an indoor swimming pool, and that there are lots of different restaurants.

So I'm gonna go again with a journalistic opener here, a journalistic phrase to open this sentence.

It has been reported that.

It has been reported that.

And because I've got the word that here, I do not need a comma.

The ship has, that doesn't really sound formal enough.

I'm gonna go with the ship boasts.

What does it have? What does it boast? A range of facilities including.

Now, this is how I'm going to get in my non-finite clause here.

Remember, a non-finite clause is a clause that begins with a verb in the progressive verb form with the -ing suffix.

So it has a range of facilities.

This is my main clause, including a gymnasium.

And now I'm going to use this clause to list some of the facilities.

A gymnasium, indoor swimming pool and multiple restaurants.

I could say lots of restaurants, but that doesn't sound quite as concise and formal.

Multiple restaurants.

Okay, now let's go back and just review this sentence, making sure we've not left any punctuation out.

It has been reported that the ship boasts a range of facilities.

Oh, remember, what do I need to separate my main clause from my non-finite subordinate clause? Well done, thank you.

I need a comma.

Comma, including a gymnasium, indoor swimming pool, and multiple restaurants.

And I've remembered my comma in my list, but I don't need it in front of the word and for my final item in my list.

Okay, great.

Now I can tick off that I have used a non-finite complex sentence.

Now on my plan, I've also mentioned that I want to share how much tickets cost, and that lots of people wanted a ticket.

I've got two facts here that I want to get into one sentence so this feels like a good opportunity to use a relative complex sentence.

So tickets.

Now my relative pronoun is going to be which, because the relative pronoun is about the tickets, which cost up to $400 have been widely sought after.

That means that lots and lots of people wanted tickets and they all sold out.

Sought after.

Now this is a double adjective here.

Sought after means lots of people wanted them.

So this is where I would use a hyphen.

Sought after full stop.

I wonder whether you can spot what type of sentence I've used here.

Tickets, which cost up to $400 has been widely sought after.

Well done if you spotted this is a relative complex sentence.

I've got my relative clause, which cost up to $400, but well done.

You might have already spotted, I forgot my second comma here.

Got to use a pair of commas around a relative clause have been widely sought after.

Now I can tick off that I have used a relative complex sentence.

Now this brings me on to my final sentence, my linking sentence, which here I'm going to use to summarise what has been.

To summarise the key information of this paragraph.

I have used lots of journalistic and subject specific vocabulary already.

I've used a non-finite complex sentence and a relative complex sentence, but not an adverbial.

So that's what I need to focus on here.

Thinking about adverbial or subordinate conjunctions I can use in adverbial complex sentences.

I would be thinking of things like, because, as, before, after, although.

I'm gonna go with although, so I'm gonna build on from this sentence because I think if I just mentioned the tickets and how much they cost, and then don't mention it again, it might be a little bit random.

So I want it to be cohesive.

So I'm gonna mention something here about the tickets.

So I'm going to go with, you know, although many are envious, that's a formal way of saying jealous.

Although many are envious of the fortunate few.

Envious, you could say the lucky few but fortunate is more formal.

Of the fortunate few who possess.

I could also say, own a ticket, a ticket.

Now this is my adverbial subordinate clause, although many are envious of the fortunate few who possess a ticket, I need a comma after my adverbial subordinate clause when I use it to start the sentence.

The Titanic's.

So even though lots of people are sort of jealous about not getting on there, I want to show that actually it's still a really positive thing for everybody.

So I'm going to say the Titanic's innovative structure and how could I describe the the interiors? And I've already referred to it as magnificent, so I don't wanna do that again.

I'm gonna go with I know, immaculate and immaculate interiors.

There's a nice bit of alliteration there too.

I and I interiors have the Titanic's innovative structure and immaculate interiors have truly captured the heart of the nation.

Again, just to sum up just how significant an event this is nationally, the heart of the nation.

Okay, let's reread the entire piece.

As well as its widely celebrated structural design, Titanic's allegedly magnificent interiors have gained much admiration on the world's stage.

It has been reported that the ship boasts a range of facilities, including a gymnasium, indoor swimming pool, and multiple restaurants.

Tickets, which cost up to $400 have been widely sought after, although many are envious of the fortunate few who possess a ticket, the Titanic's innovative structure and immaculate interiors have truly captured the heart of the nation.

I've included adverbial complex sentence there in my final sentence.

I have met my success criteria and I feel like this is a successful piece of writing.

Thank you for your help.

Thank you so much for your help just now with my writing.

So now it's your turn.

Use your plan to draught your introductory sentence.

You can use my opener if you would like to.

In addition to its impressive structural design.

My opener links back to the previous paragraph, and then the rest of my topic sentence will mention the Titanic's interiors.

Pause the video while you draught your introductory sentence.

Well done, everyone.

Here's my introductory sentence.

In addition to its impressive structural design, the Titanic's interiors are believed to be truly innovative.

Here I have used journalistic language, such as believed to be and subject specific vocabulary such as structural design and interiors.

I have now finished my topic sentence.

Now let's move on to the specific information section.

Here, make sure you're looking at the relevant part of your plan.

Okay, everyone, so now it's time for you to plan your specific information sentences.

I've put a scaffold on the screen.

It is alleged that the ship's interiors, which hmm, include a gymnasium, reading rooms, and an indoor swimming pool.

You can use this scaffold to help you if you would like, as it will help you frame a relative complex sentence.

But remember, our specific information section is not just one sentence.

Look back at your plan.

There's a lot of information you've put in your plan there, so you really should be writing more than one sentence.

And remember, with your success criteria, you want to be trying to include a relative complex sentence, an adverbial complex sentence, and a non-finite complex sentence throughout this paragraph.

So definitely take opportunities to use those types of complex sentences here in your specific information.

Pause the video now video while you draught your specific information sentences.

Well done everyone.

Here is my specific information.

It is alleged that the ship's interiors, which cost approximately $7.

5 million, included a gymnasium, reading rooms and an indoor swimming pool.

Although first-class tickets retailed at $400 each, they were highly sought after among societies most wealthy.

My although sentence is an adverbial complex sentence because although first-class tickets retailed at $400 each, this is an adverbial subordinate clause.

And I know that because it begins with that subordinating conjunction, although.

I've used journalistic language and subject specific vocabulary such as "it is alleged that" I've used my adverbial complex sentence, and I've used a relative complex sentence here.

I also wrote an extra sentence here in my specific information sentence.

I wonder whether you can spot what type of sentence it is.

Enjoying an ocean view from their cabins, first-class passengers will also experience luxury bedding, horsehair sofas, and marble topped washstands.

Well done if you spotted that this is also an example of a non-finite complex sentence.

And we know this because enjoying an ocean view from their cabins is a non-finite subordinate clause because it begins with that progressive verb form enjoying with the -ing suffix.

And that now brings us onto our linking sentence.

Make sure you've got the relevant part of your plan in front of you.

And remember, in this section, we're summarising the main information of this paragraph.

Use your plan now to draught your linking sentence.

You can use my opener as the ship currently sails towards New York.

I've given you an adverbial subordinate clause there to open your linking sentence if you would like to use it.

Pause the video now while you complete your task.

Well done everyone.

Here is my final linking sentence.

As the ship currently sails towards New York, those not fortunate enough to possess a ticket are unanimously, that means universally or altogether envious of passengers opportunity to witness firsthand such a momentous event.

I have used an adverbial complex sentence here with that as the ship currently sails towards New York, because that's an adverbial subordinate clause.

Starting with that subordinate conjunction, as.

Okay, everyone.

So now it's time for you to rewrite your sentences as a full paragraph, then check your writing and make any edits or improvements.

And remember to use your success criteria to help you.

Pause the video while you do that.

Well done everyone.

Here is my second recount paragraph.

Let's read it together.

"In addition to its impressive structural design, the Titanic's interiors are believed to be truly innovative.

It is alleged that the ship's interiors, which cost approximately $7.

5 million, included gymnasium, reading rooms and an indoor swimming pool.

Although first-class tickets cost $400 each, they were highly sought after among societies most wealthy.

Enjoying an ocean view from their cabins, first-class passengers will also experience luxury bedding, horsehair sofas, and marble topped washstands.

As the ship currently sails towards New York, those not fortunate enough to possess a ticket are unanimously envious of passengers opportunity to witness firsthand such a momentous event." Now, I've decided that this piece of writing I'm really happy with, but I've repeated the word ship several times.

So I've referred to the ship as the Titanic in my first sentence, then as the ship again.

And I've decided that I just would like to give my reader a little bit of variation and contribute to that cohesion.

So in my final linking sentence, I've replaced referring to the Titanic as a ship as instead a luxury liner.

And this is an appropriate way to refer to the ship or to the Titanic in this paragraph, because we are talking all about how luxurious it is.

Now I can say that I have met all of my success criteria.

Take a moment to check that you have met yours.

Okay, everyone.

And that now brings us to the end of our lesson today where we have been writing the second recount paragraph of a journalistic report about the Titanic.

Today we've been learning that using a range of sentence structures enhances text cohesion, and allows us to vary how information is shared across different sentences.

All complex sentences include at least one main clause and a subordinate clause.

When writing, we can use our plans and success criteria to guide us.

Planning, drafting, editing and rewriting are all stages of the writing process.

I hope you're feeling really proud of the writing outcomes you have produced in our lesson today.

Well done everyone, and I'll see you again very soon.