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Hi, everyone.
My name is Ms. Voyle and welcome to today's lesson where you are going to be writing part two of the climax of "The Firework-Maker's Daughter." This lesson is based on the 2018 Penguin Random House UK edition of "The Firework-Maker's Daughter" by Philip Pullman, and you may wish to refer to it.
Pause the video and get your copy of the book now.
Great.
Now I know you have the book with you.
During this lesson, you'll need to be listening and looking carefully.
There'll be tasks where you need somebody to talk to and you will also need a piece of paper and pen or pencil for writing.
I hope you're feeling excited and ready to learn.
Let's get started.
The learning outcome for today's lesson is I can write a well-structured paragraph for part two of the climax.
Here are our keywords for today's lesson.
Let's practise saying them.
My turn, your turn.
Direct speech, ambitious vocabulary, text flow, adverbial complex sentence.
Great job.
Well done.
Let's now take a look at their definitions.
Direct speech is the term used for a person speaking out loud in a text.
Ambitious vocabulary is high-level language in writing that meets the text's purpose.
Text flow is how a text is written to keep the reader engaged.
An adverbial complex sentence is a sentence formed of a main clause and an adverbial subordinate clause.
There are two parts to today's lesson.
In the first part, we will be preparing to write.
And in the second part, you will be writing part two of the climax.
So let's begin with preparing to write.
"The Firework-Maker's Daughter" can be structured like this: opening, build-up, climax, resolution.
In this lesson, we are writing the climax.
The purpose of the climax is to describe the main action and take the suspense and excitement to its highest point.
The climax in chapter five continues to build suspense and causes the reader to question whether Lila will succeed and survive.
In part two of the climax, your writing will focus on the following linguistic features: precise and ambitious vocabulary, specifically adverbs and verbs that show and tell the reader how the characters were feeling.
You developed these in your planning lesson.
Direct speech to form a dialogue.
You have already developed your initial ideas for the dialogue between Lila and Razvani, and it will be important to ensure that this direct speech is correctly punctuated and includes a reporting clause.
And a range of sentence types to improve text flow: simple, compound and complex sentences.
Linguistic features are types of words and language that a writer chooses carefully.
By incorporating all of these linguistic features in your climax, you will be able to produce a wonderful piece of writing.
You are going to be writing part two of the climax in "The Firework-Maker's Daughter." Part two of the climax will cover the following key moments for Lila.
Razvani was furious and mocked Lila for coming empty handed.
Razvani instructed Lila to enter the flames anyway, and she did.
Lila couldn't cope with the agonising heat.
Then Chulak arrived.
She drank the magical water and survived the flames.
You will use your plan for part two and the direct speech you developed to support you in writing part two of the climax today.
Here is an example of how a plan for paragraph two can be used to form the beginning of Lila and Razvani's dialogue.
The first key moment is Razvani was furious and mocked Lila for coming empty handed.
The precise and ambitious vocabulary we developed for Razvani was furiously roared, scoffed and laughed, bellowed.
And for Lila, nervously stuttered, trembled in fear, hesitantly replied.
Let's take a look at the beginning of a dialogue between Razvani and Lila that has been formed using the notes from our plan and the ideas we developed for direct speech.
"What do we have here? A trespasser in my cave! Speak for yourself, young girl!" roared Razvani furiously.
"I, I'm, I'm here in search of the special ingredients, Sir.
It is my goal to become a fine firework-maker," stuttered Lila nervously.
You will notice that the reporting clauses in these pieces of direct speech have used the precise and ambitious vocabulary from the plan.
Let's check your understanding.
How should you use your previous learning to support you in your writing today? A, use the notes from my plan to form full sentences.
B, use my memory of the story.
C, use the correctly punctuated direct speech I developed.
D, copy out the notes from my plan.
Pause the video and select your answers now.
The answers are A and C.
You should use the notes from your plan to form your full sentences and you should use the correctly punctuated direct speech that you have already developed.
Well done.
When writing a dialogue between two characters in a narrative, the direct speech is often mixed with a description of character's actions or movements.
Let's look at an example of this.
"What do we have here? A trespasser in my cave! Speak for yourself, young girl!" roared Razvani furiously.
Suddenly, Lila began to tremble with fear and she struggled to get out her words.
"I, I'm, I'm here in search of the special ingredient, Sir.
It is my goal to become a fine firework-maker," she stuttered nervously.
Describing a character's movements or emotions can enhance the speech that follows and impact the way the speech is read.
This description of Lila says that she began to tremble with fear and struggled to get out her words.
You'll notice that that impacted how I read the speech that followed.
Let's check your understanding.
True or false? Mixing direct speech with descriptive writing can enhance a dialogue in a narrative.
Pause the video and select your answer now.
That is true.
Well done.
Let's take a look at the possible justifications.
A, it provides greater detail about a character's movements and emotions and it can impact how the speech is read.
Or B, it looks more interesting on the page.
Pause the video and select the correct justification now.
The answer is A.
Well done.
Incorporating descriptive writing in between the direct speech in a dialogue is a great way to provide greater detail about a character's movements and emotions, and it can also help the reader know how to read the speech.
Following the dialogue between Lila and Razvani, you will write the final part of the climax using a range of sentence types to support text flow.
Let's look at an example.
"Lila begged Razvani for help but he refused.
She knew she had no choice.
She would have to enter the flames.
As she stepped deeper into the pit of flames, the scorching heat rapidly spread throughout her body." Let's take a look at the different sentence types here.
In the first sentence, the coordinating conjunction but has been used to form a compound sentence.
It joins two main clauses.
The second sentence is an example of a simple sentence because it contains one main clause.
In the final sentence, the subordinating conjunction as has been used to begin an adverbial clause.
This is then separated from the main clause with a comma and this forms an adverbial complex sentence.
Let's look at the rules for an adverbial complex sentence.
An adverbial clause is a type of subordinate clause.
It is a group of words that contains a verb and does not make complete sense.
When an adverbial clause is joined to a main clause, it makes an adverbial complex sentence.
The main clause can come first, followed by the subordinate clause or the subordinate clause can come first, but then there must be a comma to separate it from the main clause.
A range of subordinating conjunctions can be used to begin an adverbial clause.
Each is used for a different purpose.
Let's take a look at some of these subordinating conjunctions now.
When, that, because, so, as.
Let's now check your understanding of the different sentence types.
Match the sentence types to their definition.
The sentence types are A, simple sentence, B, compound sentence, C, adverbial complex sentence.
The definitions are a sentence formed of a main clause and an adverbial subordinate clause.
A sentence made of just one main clause with just one idea and a sentence formed of two main clauses and a joining word.
Pause the video and match these now.
Let's take a look at the answers together.
A simple sentence is a sentence made of just one main clause with just one idea.
A compound sentence is a sentence formed of two main clauses and a joining word.
And an adverbial complex sentence is a sentence formed of a main clause and an adverbial subordinate clause.
Well done for showing a great understanding of the different sentence types.
I am sure you are feeling ready to use all of them in your writing.
It's now time for your first task and it is a talk task where you are going to orally rehearse your sentences.
Say the beginning of part two of the climax.
Include the following: precise and ambitious vocabulary from your plan.
Direct speech to form a dialogue.
A description of characters' movements and emotions.
Use your plan for paragraph two, which looks like this, and the direct speech you developed to support you.
Pause the video and do the task now.
Welcome back.
I loved listening to your oral rehearsal.
I was so impressed with how well you included all of the appropriate linguistic features, and I also loved listening to how you varied your tone and expression for the direct speech from different characters.
Let's take a look at a good example now.
"Speak for yourself, intruder!" Razvani demanded furiously.
Lila shook with fear and didn't know quite what to say.
"Please forgive me.
I need your help becoming a firework-maker," she nervously replied.
The Great Fire God simply laughed at her.
He couldn't believe his ears.
"You've brought nothing with you! What about the three presents? The magical water?" scoffed Razvani.
Here we can see that precise and ambitious vocabulary from the plan has been used, like, "demanded furiously," "shook with fear," "nervously replied." Direct speech has been used to form a dialogue between Razvani and Lila, and a new line was started when a new character was speaking.
The dialogue is also interspersed with description of the characters' movements and emotions.
This helps the reader know how to read the speech that follows.
I hope you enjoyed orally rehearsing your sentences and I am sure you are now feeling really confident to begin your writing.
It's now time for the most exciting part of the lesson where you are going to be writing part two of the climax.
When we write, we always try to do these things: plan and say each sentence before we write it.
Use punctuation where we know the rules.
Vary our sentence types.
Write letters neatly on the line in joined handwriting.
Sound out words to spell them accurately.
Read our sentences out loud to check they make sense and edit to improve our writing if necessary.
Here is the success criteria for your writing today.
Let's read over it together.
I have used precise and ambitious vocabulary from my plan, including show and tell to enhance description.
I have written correctly punctuated direct speech to form a dialogue between Lila and Razvani.
I have used a range of sentence types to support text flow, including an adverbial complex sentence.
You will also use the notes from your plan and the direct speech you developed to support you with your writing today.
Pause the video and make sure you have these with you now.
Great, now I know you have your plan and the direct speech you developed with you.
This will really help you with your writing today.
I am going to show you a model of the beginning of the dialogue in part two of the climax, and then I'm going to need your help checking it against the success criteria to make sure I have included all of the correct linguistic features.
"Who dares to enter my cave?" roared Razvani furiously.
The raging ball of fire spewed out hot embers as he stomped towards Lila.
"I, I'm, I'm sorry, Sir.
Please hear me out.
I need your help," replied Lila sheepishly.
She trembled with fear.
I'd like you to pause the video and check this writing against the success criteria and see if you can spot where each part has met it.
Pause the video and do this now.
You were great at spotting the linguistic features.
Well done.
Let's take a look together.
For I have used precise and ambitious vocabulary from my plan, including show and tell to enhance description, we can see precise verbs and adverbs, like, "roared, "furiously" and "replied sheepishly," "trembled with fear." So we can tick that.
For I have written correctly punctuated direct speech to form a dialogue between Lila and Razvani, I have remembered to use inverted commas to enclose the speech that each character says, and I have included the correct punctuation throughout with reporting clauses that include detail about how the character spoke.
I also remembered to start a new line for when Lila began speaking because a new speaker needs a new line.
So I can tick that.
And for I have used a range of sentence types to support text flow, including an adverbial complex sentence complex, well, I can see the sentence, "The raging ball of fire spewed out hot embers as he stomped towards Lila." That is an adverbial complex sentence because it has an adverbial clause beginning with the subordinating conjunction as.
I can also see a simple sentence at the end.
"She trembled with fear." But I can't spot a compound sentence here, so I'm not going to tick that part of the success criteria yet, but I would know I need to include a compound sentence later on.
I hope you are feeling excited to start your writing because it's time for your first task.
Use your plan, your direct speech and the success criteria to write the dialogue between Lila and Razvani.
Stop writing before she enters the flames.
Here is the success criteria and here is a reminder of the punctuation rules for direct speech.
Remember to begin a new line for a new character speaking.
Pause the video and do the task now.
Well done for your hard work and concentration writing the dialogue between Lila and Razvani.
I could see just how hard you tried to remember all of the correct punctuation rules for the direct speech.
It's now time to reflect on your writing.
Read your writing back to check it makes sense and edit any punctuation errors.
Tick the box for each part of the success criteria when you are sure you have met it.
Pause the video and do this now.
Well done for reflecting on your writing.
I'm sure you did a great job at meeting the success criteria.
Let's read over a good example of the dialogue between Lila and Razvani.
"Who dares to enter my cavern?" roared Razvani furiously.
Suddenly, Lila began to tremble with fear and she struggled to get out her words.
"I, I'm, I'm here in search of the special ingredient to become a firework-maker," she stuttered nervously.
"And you thought it wise to come here empty handed? No presents or magical water?! Oh you silly girl," scoffed the great fire spirit.
Lila was speechless.
She hadn't known she needed to bring anything or she would have.
"Enter the fire, Lila! What else have you come for?" Razvani instructed tauntingly.
Let's take a look at how this meets the success criteria.
For precise and ambitious vocabulary from our plan, including show and tell, we can see really ambitious verbs and adverbs, like "roared, "furiously," "tremble with fear," "stuttered nervously," "scoffed," instructed tauntingly." For the next part of the success criteria, direct speech that forms a dialogue, we can see direct speech from Razvani and Lila that forms a dialogue, a conversation between the two characters.
A new line was started when a new character was speaking and the punctuation rules have been followed to form these direct speech sentences.
And for the final piece on the success criteria, I can use a range of sentence types.
We can see a compound sentence here.
Suddenly, Lila began to tremble with fear and she struggled to get out her words.
The coordinating conjunction and joins two main clauses.
And a simple sentence later on.
"Lila was speechless." But we haven't used an adverbial complex sentence here yet, so we must make sure we use that in the next part if we haven't already.
We can tick the first two boxes on our success criteria and we know that we need to make sure we include an adverbial complex sentence in the final part of the climax.
It's now time for you to continue writing.
Use your plan and your success criteria to write the final part of the climax.
Here is the success criteria.
And you should have been able to tick off the first two boxes because you have already used precise and ambitious vocabulary from your plan to form the dialogue between Lila and Razvani.
You will now be focusing on writing the rest of the climax using a range of sentence types, but don't forget to continue using your plan to include the precise and ambitious vocabulary you developed.
Here is a reminder of how to form an adverbial complex sentence.
You can have the subordinate clause first with a comma to separate it from the main clause, or you can have the main clause first, followed by the subordinate clause.
Subordinating conjunctions are used to begin the adverbial clause.
These are as, when, that, because and so.
Pause the video and do the task now.
Welcome back.
Well done for completing the writing of your climax.
You have worked so hard.
It's now time for you to reflect on your writing again.
Read your writing back to check it makes sense and edit any punctuation errors.
Then focus on the final part of the success criteria.
I have used a range of sentence types to support text flow, including an adverbial complex sentence.
Make sure you have done this and when you have, tick this part of the success criteria.
Pause the video now and come back and press play once you have done this.
Well done for reflecting on your writing and making any necessary improvements.
I am sure you did a fantastic job at including a range of sentence types.
Let's take a look at a good example together.
"Lila pleaded for Razvani to help her, but he revelled in her fear.
She realised she would have to enter the flames without protection.
As she stepped into the scorching fire, she felt the heat spread through every muscle in her body.
Before long, the agonising pain consumed her.
She lost all hope and she accepted her fate.
Just then, a voice urgently called out to her.
It was Chulak.
He thrust the magical water at her and anxiously watched as she guzzled every drop.
All of a sudden, a feeling of coolness trickled through her.
She could breathe again.
She joyfully danced through the flames that once tortured her.
She had conquered the fire.
Nothing stood in her way now.
Let's take a look at how a range of sentence types have been used here.
The first sentence uses the coordinating conjunction but to join two main clauses.
This is a great example of a compound sentence.
Then the sentence, "As she stepped into the scorching fire, she felt the heat spread through every muscle in her body." This sentence uses the subordinating conjunction as to begin an adverbial clause.
And a comma separates it from the main clause.
So this is adverbial complex sentence.
We can see another compound sentence.
"She lost all hope and she accepted her fate.
' Then there are a couple of good examples of simple sentences that contain just one main clause.
"It was Chulak.
She could breathe again." And finally, there is another adverbial complex sentence, but this time, it begins with a main clause.
She joyfully danced through the flames.
And then the subordinating conjunction that has been used to add detail about the flames, "That once tortured her." So we can tick that final box on our success criteria.
Well done again for all of your hard work during today's lesson.
I am so proud of what you have written.
We've now come to the end of our lesson, so let's go over a summary together.
Direct speech between two characters in a narrative forms a dialogue.
Inverted commas are used to demarcate speech.
And a piece of punctuation separates speech from the reporting clause.
Precise and ambitious vocabulary shows and tells the reader what happened, and how characters are feeling.
Using a range of sentence types improves text flow for the reader.
And an adverbial complex sentence is a sentence formed of a main clause and an adverbial subordinate clause.
I have thoroughly enjoyed teaching you this lesson.