Lesson video

Hi everyone.

My name is Ms. Royalle.

And welcome to today's lesson where you are going to be writing the climax of a Christmas Carol.

You have already written a plan for your climax, and you will need this to support you with your writing today.

Pause the video now and make sure you have your notes with you.

Great, now, I know you have your notes with you.

During this lesson, you'll need to be listening and looking carefully.

There'll be tasks where you need somebody to talk to and you'll also need a piece of paper and pen or pencil for doing your writing.

I hope you are feeling excited and ready to learn.

Let's get started.

The learning outcome for today's lesson is I can write the climax of 'A Christmas Carol'.

Here are the key words for today's lesson.

Let's practise saying them my turn, your turn.

Climax.

Suspense.

Cohesion.

Direct speech.

Great job, well done.

Let's take a look at their definitions.

The climax is the point in the narrative that describes the main action and takes the suspense to its highest point.

Suspense is a state of feeling excited or anxious uncertainty about what may happen.

Cohesion refers to how a text flows in order to maintain the interest of the reader and achieve the purpose.

And direct speech is the term used for a character speaking out loud in a text.

There are two parts to today's lesson.

In the first part, we will be preparing to write and in the second part you will be writing the climax.

So let's begin with preparing to write.

The purpose of the climax is to describe the main action and take the suspense to its highest point.

You have already written the opening and buildup of your narrative and you have already planned the climax.

In this lesson, you'll be writing two paragraphs for the climax.

The climax needs to include the following linguistic features.

Precise vocabulary that takes the suspense to its highest point.

This should include description of the ominous atmosphere and show and tell for Scrooge's emotions.

A range of sentence types and structures, including simple, compound and complex sentences.

And the use of fronted adverbials to add detail.

And you will need to include direct speech for Scrooge.

Linguistic features are types of words and language that a writer chooses carefully.

The paragraphs of your climax will be structured like this.

In paragraph one, the ghost of Christmas Future appears and transports Scrooge to an empty graveyard.

You will describe the following, the vision of Scrooge's own lonely deice, unloved and unmourned.

The current fate of the impoverished crochet family.

In paragraph two, the suspense will reach its highest point and lead to Scrooge's ultimate realisation.

It'll describe the following Scrooge's panic as he asks the ghost worried questions and Scrooge's realisation that the future holds grave consequences if he does not change his ways.

It's important for you to demonstrate cohesion across both paragraphs of the climax.

Cohesion refers to how a text flows in order to maintain the interest of the reader and achieve the purpose.

The purpose of the climax is to gradually take the suspense to its highest point.

You'll achieve cohesion across both paragraphs by conveying how Scrooge's emotions build in intensity.

Let's check your understanding.

True or false.

Text cohesion is important for the reader.

Pause the video and select your answer.

That is true.

Well done.

Now it's time to justify your answer.

A, cohesion surprises and shocks the reader.

Or B, cohesion ensures the text flows in a way that engages the reader and achieves the desired purpose.

Pause the video and select the correct justification.

The answer is B.

Well done.

Cohesion ensures the text flows in a way that engages the reader and achieves the desired purpose.

Let's consider how the gradual building of suspense will support cohesion across both paragraphs.

We are going to look at some examples of how our vocabulary choice can convey the gradual building of Scrooge's emotions in intensity.

For paragraph one, weary miser, exhausted eyes, concerned, felt heavyweight, overwhelmed by the pain he witnessed.

For paragraph two, panic surged through his body.

Voice trembled, desperately pleaded, deepest regret and sorrow.

Scrooge's emotions build in intensity across both paragraphs.

By conveying this, you will be able to achieve cohesion across both paragraphs.

Let's check your understanding.

How will you ensure cohesion across both paragraphs in the climax? A, by conveying utter panic within Scrooge throughout.

B, by conveying how Scrooge's emotions build in intensity.

Or C, by focusing mainly on the visions and not Scrooge's emotions.

Pause the video and select the correct answer.

The answer is B, well done.

You will ensure cohesion across both paragraphs in the climax by conveying how Scrooge's emotions build in intensity.

Oral rehearsal is a key part of the writing process.

When orally rehearsing sentences out loud, you can hear how your words sound when they are put together in sentences.

This helps you to structure grammatically correct, full sentences and make sure your sentences flow well from one to the next.

Oral rehearsal offers an opportunity to refine your ideas and sentence structure.

This supports text cohesion.

Let's check your understanding.

True or false.

Oral rehearsal prior to writing supports text cohesion.

Pause the video and select your answer.

That is true, well done.

Now it's time to justify your answer.

A, oral rehearsal helps to structure grammatically correct, full sentences and ensure they flow well from one to the next.

Or B, oral rehearsal is the most fun part of the writing process.

Pause the video and select the correct justification.

The answer is A, well done.

Oral rehearsal helps to structure grammatically correct, full sentences and ensure they flow well from one to the next.

Hopefully you do also find oral rehearsal a fun part of the writing process too.

It's now time for your first task.

Say the first four sentences of paragraph one of the climax.

Make sure you include the following, precise and descriptive vocabulary conveying an ominous atmosphere, and show and tell to convey Scrooge's emotions building the suspense.

Here are some examples of what your starting sentences could be.

In the dead of night.

And then complete this sentence with a main clause that introduces the Ghost of Christmas yet to come.

With a wave of his skeletal hands, he beckoned the, use an alternative noun for Scrooge towards him and complete this compound sentence by describing where the ghost took Scrooge.

Pause the video and orally rehearse the first few sentences for paragraph one of the climax now.

Welcome back.

You did a great job at orally rehearsing the first few sentences of paragraph one, and I really enjoyed listening to you.

Let's take a look at a good example together.

In the dead of night, the Ghost of Christmas yet to come boldly appeared.

With a silent wave of his skeletal hands, he beckoned the distressed miser towards him and whisked him through time to a sombre scene.

In the middle of a dreadfully bleak cemetery, Scrooge found himself stood over his own neglected moss-covered grave.

With a grim gesture, the Ghost revealed visions of a lonely demise.

Scrooge suddenly felt the heavy sadness of his solitude.

For precise and descriptive vocabulary, we can see the dead of night.

It says that the ghost boldly appeared.

It describes the silent wave of his skeletal hands.

So from early on, here we are conveying that ominous atmosphere and for show and tell to convey Scrooge's emotions, we can see the phrase distressed miser and the last sentence is a great example of this.

Scrooge suddenly felt the heavy sadness of his solitude.

All of this conveys an ominous atmosphere and gradually builds the suspense.

Paragraph two of your climax involves direct speech from Scrooge.

Orally rehearsing direct speech is a great way to check whether the words you have chosen convey the appropriate emotion Scrooge is feeling.

Rehearsing direct speech in the way that you imagine Scrooge to say it also offers an opportunity to ensure the reporting clause is appropriate.

Let's take a look at an example.

"Tell me this isn't true," Scrooge pleaded.

When saying this out loud, I might decide that I want to alter my word choice slightly to really convey the fraught of his emotions.

For example, I might change this to "Please, tell me this isn't true!" Scrooge pleaded desperately.

Let's check your understanding.

How should you orally rehearse the direct speech for Scrooge.

A, in the same voice I use for all of my oral rehearsal.

B, in a positive and uplifting manner.

Or C in the way I want Scrooge to speak to convey his emotions.

Pause the video and select the correct answer.

The answer is C, well done.

You should orally rehearse the direct speech for Scrooge in the way that you want him to speak to convey his emotions.

It's now time for your second task.

Say the first four sentences of paragraph two of the climax.

Make sure you include the following, precise and descriptive vocabulary that conveys Scrooge's fraught emotions and direct speech and inner thoughts from Scrooge.

Your starting sentences could be Scrooge's panic set in as, and you could complete this adverbial subordinate clause with an inner thought from Scrooge.

You should then include a piece of direct speech from Scrooge.

And I have used a question mark here with the reporting clause Scrooge asked in horror.

And then we have the ghost remained silent.

Choose an adverb to describe the silence.

Pause the video now to orally rehearse the first few sentences of paragraph two of the climax.

Welcome back.

You did a great job at orally rehearsing paragraph two.

Let's take a look at a good example together.

Scrooge's panic set in as he realised how grave the consequences of his cruel behaviour were.

"Please tell me, will these visions definitely come true?" Scrooge asked in horror.

The ghost remained unforgivingly silent.

"There must be something I can do to prevent this.

I need to know it's not too late," Scrooge desperately pleaded, but the ghost still did not utter a word.

Scrooge felt an acute sense of sorrow and regret.

He knew the time had come to alter his ways.

For precise and descriptive vocabulary conveying Scrooge's fraught emotions.

We have his panic set in.

We can see that he asked that first question in horror.

The next piece of direct speech uses the reporting clause desperately pleaded.

This vocabulary shows and tells the reader how fraught Scrooge's emotions are up to this point.

And for direct speech we can see, please tell me will these visions definitely come true, and there must be something I can do to prevent this.

I need to know it's not too late.

And for inner thoughts we can see he realised how grave the consequences of his cruel behaviour were.

And further down we can see Scrooge felt an acute sense of sorrow and regret.

He knew the time had come to alter his ways.

All of this takes the suspense to its highest point through conveying just how fraught Scrooge's emotions are leading up to his realisation that he must change.

It's now time for the second and most exciting part of the lesson where you are going to be writing the climax.

When we write, we always try to do these things, plan and say each sentence before we write it.

Use punctuation where we know the rules.

Vary our sentence types.

Write letters neatly on the line in joined handwriting Sound out words to spell them accurately.

And read our sentences out loud to check they make sense and edit to improve our writing if necessary.

Here is the success criteria for your writing today.

Listen carefully, I will read it to you.

I have used precise vocabulary including 'show and tell' to convey an ominous atmosphere in the climax.

I have conveyed Scrooge's fraught emotions through the use of direct speech and by sharing his inner thoughts.

And I have demonstrated cohesion across both paragraphs as I have taken the suspense to its highest point.

You will use the notes from your plan for writing today.

Pause the video now and make sure you have them with you.

Great, now I know you have your plan with you.

I am now going to share a model of the beginning of paragraph one of the climax with you.

And then I'm going to need your help checking it against the success criteria.

Listen carefully.

"In the final hours of the night, the haunting ghost of Christmas future appeared and he silently swept Scrooge away.

The weary miser found himself in a chilling cemetery, stood above and isolated neglected gravestone.

Before long, he realised it was his own." Can you now check my writing against the success criteria? Now you are only checking it against the first point on the success criteria.

I have used precise vocabulary including 'show and tell' because the next two points cannot be checked until you have written both paragraphs.

Pause the video and see if you can spot where I have used precise vocabulary and show and tell.

You were so great at spotting where I had been really precise and descriptive in my language choices.

Well done.

We can see the use of the adjective haunting to describe the ghost of Christmas future, and it says he silently swept Scrooge away.

That is really precise description that conveys that ominous atmosphere.

And an example of show and tell is we can see that Scrooge is referred to as the wary miser, and he found himself in a chilling cemetery.

We can also see the last sentence says "Before long he realised it was his own." This is quite a suspenseful sentence that conveys his shock at discovering he stood above his own grave.

So we can take that point on the success criteria.

It's now time for you to begin writing your climax.

Use your plan and the success criteria to write paragraph one of the climax.

Remember that in this paragraph you are covering the following points.

The ghost of Christmas future transports Scrooge to a graveyard.

Scrooge sees a vision of his own lonely demise, and the current fate of the Cratchit family is revealed.

Pause the video and write paragraph one of the climax now.

Welcome back.

Well done for working so hard on writing paragraph one of the climax.

Let's take a look at a good example together, and then we will check it against the success criteria.

"In the dead of night, a figure cloaked in shadows emerged besides Scrooge's bed.

The ghost of Christmas yet to come stood tall and silent as he beckoned the weary and tortured miser towards him.

Without further warning, Scrooge found himself transported to a desolate, bleak cemetery.

As Scrooge exhausted eyes scanned the scene, he saw flashing snapshots of his lonely demise.

With a grim gesture, the ghost revealed Scrooge's cold, unmarked grave to him.

He felt the heavy weight of leaving this earth unloved, unmourned, and forgotten by all.

Finally, Scrooge was shown the current fate of the struggling Cratchit family.

The suffering and grief he witnessed suddenly became too much for his soul to bear." So we are searching for precise vocabulary including 'show and tell'.

Let's take a look.

We can see a figure cloaked in shadows, beckoned the wary and tortured miser towards him.

That's a great example of 'show and tell'.

We can see a great expanded noun phrase for the cemetery, desolate, bleak cemetery that conveys that ominous atmosphere.

Scrooge's exhausted eyes.

Further down we can see he felt the heavy weight and became too much for his soul to bear.

So we can tick that first point on our success criteria.

Now it's time to prepare ourselves for writing paragraph two.

I am going to share a model of the beginning of paragraph two of the climax with you.

And then you are going to see if you can check it against my success criteria so that we can tick those final two boxes.

Listen carefully.

"Scrooge felt sheer panic surge through his body as he considered the gravity of what the future held.

'Tell me this is not true, please!' Scrooge cried in desperation as he searched for some kind of reassurance.

The ghost did not utter a word." Can you now check my writing against the success criteria? You are searching for examples of direct speech or Scrooge's inner thoughts that convey his fraught emotions.

And then you want to consider whether I have demonstrated cohesion across both paragraphs.

Have I conveyed how Scrooge's emotions build in intensity and have I taken them to their highest point in this second paragraph.

Pause the video and discuss with your partner.

You did a great job at checking my writing against the success criteria.

Well done.

Let's take a look together.

The first sentence shares Scrooge's inner thoughts.

It says, "Scrooge felt sheer panic surged through his body as he considered the gravity of what the future held." This is also a great example of an adverbial complex sentence.

And the sentence after it includes direct speech from Scrooge, "Tell me this is not true, please!" Scrooge cried in desperation.

So we can tick that point on the success criteria.

And for the final point, I have demonstrated cohesion across both paragraphs as I have taken the suspense to its highest point.

In paragraph one, we conveyed that Scrooge's emotions were intensifying gradually as the visions were revealed.

And then in paragraph two, I have taken the suspense to the highest point by saying Scrooge felt sheer panic surge through his body and he cried in desperation.

So I can tick that point on the success criteria.

It's now time for you to finish writing the climax.

Use your plan and the success criteria to write paragraph two of the climax.

Remember that it needs to cover the following.

The suspense reaches its highest point as Scrooge panics.

Scrooge asks the Ghost of Christmas Future worried questions.

This is where you will include direct speech.

And Scrooge has the realisation that he must change his ways.

This is where you'll definitely need to include his inner thoughts.

Pause the video and write paragraph two of the climax now.

Welcome back and well done for working so hard on completing the climax of your narrative.

It's now time for you to read your writing back, to check it to make sense and edit any punctuation errors.

You should also check your writing against the success criteria to make sure you have met each point, and tick the boxes when you are sure you have done so.

Pause the video and do this now.

Well done for reading over your writing and reflecting on your work.

I am sure you did a great job at meeting the success criteria.

Let's now take a look at a good example of paragraph two and check it against the success criteria together.

"Scrooge's panic set in as he realised the true extent of his cruelty and indifference.

'Is this truly my fate?' Scrooge's voice trembled with fear.

'Can I change this future? Please tell me there is still hope.

' He desperately pleaded as he searched for a reassuring response.

However, the ghost remained utterly silent and unmoved.

The cold presence of the Ghost of Christmas yet to come served as a stark warning to Scrooge.

He realised the inevitability of the suffering that lay ahead If he didn't alter his ways.

With a sense of deep regret and sorrow, Scrooge knew that the time for true change had come." So for direct speech and Scrooge's inner thoughts, we can see "Is this truly my fate?" Scrooge's voice trembled with fear.

"Can I change this future? Please tell me there is still hope." He desperately pleaded.

Those are two great pieces of direct speech that's a very descriptive in the way that he said them.

And further down we can see an example of Scrooge's inner thoughts.

He realised the inevitability of the suffering that lay ahead if he didn't alter his ways.

So we can take that point.

And for cohesion across both paragraphs, paragraph two needed to take the suspense to its highest point by showing just how much Scrooge's emotions had intensified.

We can see it says his panic set in.

He desperately pleaded and he felt a sense of deep regret and sorrow.

So we can tick that final point.

We've now come to the end of our lesson, so let's go over a summary together.

The climax takes the suspense to its highest point as Scrooge encounters the Ghost of Christmas yet to come.

The climax is written over two paragraphs, and it is important to demonstrate cohesion across them.

Cohesion refers to how a text flows in order to maintain the interest of the reader and achieve the purpose.

Scrooge's emotions increase in intensity across both paragraphs in the climax, which supports cohesion.

And oral rehearsal helps to structure grammatically correct full sentences and also supports cohesion.

Well done again for all of your hard work writing the climax of a Christmas Carol, I have really enjoyed teaching you this lesson.