Lesson video

Hi everyone.

My name is Ms. Voyle and I am so excited to be teaching you your writing lesson today where you will be writing the first paragraph of your persuasive advert.

For this lesson, you need to be listening and looking carefully.

There will be tasks where you need somebody to talk to and there will also be some writing, so you will need a piece of paper and pen or pencil.

I hope you're feeling excited and ready to learn.

Let's get started.

The learning outcome for today's lesson is, "I can write a persuasive paragraph that communicates the unique selling point of a product." Here are the key words.

Let's practise saying them.

My turn, your turn.

Unique selling point.

Relative pronoun.

Relative clause.

Relative complex sentence.

Well done.

Let's take a look at their definitions.

A unique selling point is what makes a product better than others on the market.

A relative pronoun is a word that starts a relative clause, like who or which.

A relative clause is a type of subordinate clause that starts with a relative pronoun and a relative complex sentence is a sentence formed of a main clause and a relative subordinate clause.

There are two parts to today's lesson.

In the first part, we will be preparing to write and in the second part you'll be writing your first paragraph.

So let's begin with preparing to write.

The main body of the persuasive advert will be titled "Happy and Healthy" and split into two paragraphs.

Paragraph one will focus on the happy aspect by communicating the unique selling point with a focus on taste.

Think about all of the ways that you are going to make the energy ball sound like it tastes delicious.

Paragraph two will focus on the healthy aspect, where you will provide details about the product's ingredients and health benefits.

In this lesson, we are writing the first paragraph, happy, where we will focus on the taste.

First, let's plan what we are going to write.

The first paragraph is all about convincing the reader that the product will make them happy.

It needs to achieve the following.

Communicate the unique selling point.

It is a delicious chocolate snack that is also healthy.

Focus on the taste and chocolate ingredient to appeal to the reader and use linguistic techniques to exaggerate and persuade.

Let's check your understanding.

What should the first paragraph achieve? Select two answers from the following.

A, communicate the unique selling points, chocolatey and healthy.

B.

Detail all the ingredients of the product.

C.

Detail the health benefits of the product and D, focus on the taste and chocolate ingredient.

Pause the video and answer now.

The answer is A and D.

Well done.

We want to communicate that unique selling point that it is chocolatey and healthy, which is often considered unusual, and we wanna really focus in on that taste and how good and scrumptious the chocolate ingredient makes it taste.

It's important to ensure the first paragraph does not repeat the same language used in your headline and opening.

We can do this by going back and looking at our headline and opening to check what is in it.

Let's take a look at this model example.

We can see that the headline says "Energy Bouncing Balls".

I then have an opening, a rhetorical question and a follow-up statement.

My rhetorical question is, "Do you love chocolate and want to be healthy?" And my follow-up statement is, "These chocolate covered nutritious balls will have your taste buds bouncing with joy and your body bouncing with energy." Now I want to make sure that in my first paragraph I do not repeat all of the same vocabulary, so let's take a look at an example beginning to "Happy and Healthy." "These tantalising treats, which are packed full of nutrient-rich ingredients, are coated in the creamiest most indulgent chocolate.

They are mouth wateringly delicious." My first paragraph is focusing on taste, and you will notice that I used a variety of adjectives and synonyms that's differed from my headline and opening.

Let's check your understanding.

How can you ensure the first paragraph doesn't sound repetitive to the headline and opening? A.

varied use of adjectives, B.

range of synonyms for the product, C.

completely different language and points, or D, different font and colour.

Pause the video and select your answers now.

The answers are A and B.

By using a variety of adjectives and a range of synonyms for the product, we can ensure that our happy and healthy section does not sound repetitive to our headline and opening.

This will make your persuasive advert more engaging and exciting for the reader, which will help to persuade them.

Read the first sentence for paragraph one.

"These tantalising treats, which are packed full of nutrient-rich ingredients, are coated in the creamiest most indulgent chocolate." This is an example of a relative complex sentence.

Main clause comma subordinate clause comma main clause.

The relative pronoun 'which' has been used to embed a relative clause within our main clause.

This allows us to add more detail about the proceeding noun.

The main clause in this sentence is, "These tantalising treats are coated in the creamiest most indulgent chocolate." My relative embedded clause is, "which are packed full of nutrient-rich ingredients." This adds detail about the preceding noun, the tantalising treats.

A relative clause is a type of subordinate clause that starts with a relative pronoun.

Who need nutrients from healthy snacks, which is a healthy and nutritious snack.

The relative pronouns are who and which.

Who is used when the relative clause is about a person and which is used when the relative clause is not about a person.

Our persuasive advert is not about a person, it is about a delicious and nutritious snack, so we will be using the relative pronoun which.

Let's check your understanding.

Tick the examples of relative clauses appropriate for adding detail about the energy ball.

Remember, you need to look out for the correct relative pronoun that is used when adding detail about a noun that is not a person.

A, who are coated in milk chocolate, B, which contains energy boosting ingredients, C, which is a healthy alternative snack, or D, who is a delicious and healthy treat.

Pause the video and select your answers now.

The answers are B, which contains energy boosting ingredients, and C, which is a healthy alternative snack.

These relative clauses have used the correct relative pronoun, which.

Read the first sentence for paragraph one again.

How does the structure of the sentence communicate the unique selling point while focusing on the taste of the product? "These tantalising treats, which are packed full of nutrient-rich ingredients, are coated in the creamiest, most indulgent chocolate." The main clause focuses on the taste of the product.

A relative clause has been embedded to communicate the unique selling points.

Let's check your understanding.

Which relative clauses could I embed in the following main clause to communicate the unique selling point? My main clause is, "The blissful bite will fulfil all your chocolate cravings." I have left a blank space where you can embed a relative clause to communicate the unique selling points.

Choose from the following options which would work.

A, which is the best snack available, B, which is packed with nutrients, C, which is crunchy and mouthwatering D, which is also a great health snack.

Pause the video and select your answer now.

The answers are B and D.

We could say, "The blissful bite, which is packed with nutrients, will fulfil all your chocolate cravings." That communicates the unique selling point because it talks about health benefits and the chocolate taste.

D does the same.

"The blissful bite, which is also a great health snack, will fulfil all your chocolate cravings." Well done.

It's important to use persuasive linguistic techniques throughout your writing in paragraph one.

You can use the following techniques.

Exaggeration, so you could use a superlative.

The softest, chewiest chocolate treat there is, that is a great example of exaggeration.

Alliteration, blissful bite, tantalising treat.

Rhyme, sweet treat eat.

Onomatopoeia, words like boing, crunch, swirl.

These are words that imitate the sound they describe.

Personification.

An example of where we did that is saying, "make your taste buds dance," because we know that taste buds can't actually dance.

Let's check your understanding of persuasive linguistic techniques.

Read the following example for paragraph one.

Which persuasive linguistic techniques can you spot? "Happy and Healthy.

These tantalising treats, which are packed full of nutrient-rich ingredients, are coated in the creamiest, most indulgent chocolate.

They are mouth wateringly good.

When you bite into this chocolatey chew, your taste buds will jump with joy.

Boing.

If you are looking for a delicious treat that is healthy and sweet, the energy bouncing ball will be right up your street." Pause the video and spot the persuasive linguistic techniques that have been used now.

Hopefully you spotted alliteration and synonyms. For example, tantalising treats and chocolatey chew are synonyms for our product, but they have also carefully paired an adjective to the noun that forms alliteration.

Maybe you spotted the use of superlatives, the creamiest, most indulgent chocolate, to try and make the reader think that it's the best.

Hopefully you spotted the personification, taste buds will jump, and the onomatopoeia, boing.

And the rhyme, treat sweet street.

Well done.

It's now time for your first task.

Say the first two sentences of your first paragraph.

Make sure you include the following.

A relative complex sentence, communicating the unique selling point of the product with a focus on the taste and chocolate ingredient.

Your main clause should be about the chocolatey taste and your relative clause can add in a detail about the health benefits.

And your second sentence should incorporate a persuasive linguistic technique.

A reminder of these are exaggeration, alliteration, rhyme, onomatopoeia, personification.

And just a visual reminder of what that relative complex sentence looks like.

Main clause comma subordinate clause, about health benefits, comma main clause.

Pause the video and discuss and orally rehearse your sentences now.

It's time to check your sentences.

Did you include a relative complex sentence? Did you use a variety of linguistic techniques to persuade? I heard some wonderful ideas.

Let's take a look at a good example.

"Happy and Healthy.

These tantalising treats, which are packed full of nutrient-rich ingredients, are coated in the creamiest, most indulgent chocolate.

They are mouth wateringly delicious.

When you bite into this sweet treat, you'll experience a taste that you just can't beat.

Choose this nutritious nibble for the dreamiest chocolate experience.

Crunch." Now let's take a look at why this is a really good first paragraph for our happy and healthy section.

I can see that I've got that relative complex sentence first.

"These tantalising treats, comma, which are packed full of nutrient-rich ingredients, comma, are coated in the creamiest, most indulgent chocolate." My relative clause has embedded a piece of information about the nutrients so that the whole sentence communicates the unique selling point.

I can also see a variety of linguistic techniques to persuade.

Creamiest, most indulgent is a superlative.

Mouth-wateringly delicious is really precise, descriptive vocabulary that evokes the reader's senses.

I've got rhyme, sweet, treat, beat.

I've got different synonyms like nutritious nibble, and I've even got a piece of onomatopoeia in there.

Crunch.

Well done for doing your talk task and coming up with such brilliant ideas for your first paragraph.

It's time for the second part of our lesson, the most exciting part because you are going to take all of your wonderful ideas and write them down.

Here is your success criteria.

I have written a relative complex sentence focusing on taste and communicating the unique selling point.

I have used a range of synonyms and adjectives to describe the product.

I have used a variety of persuasive linguistic techniques and I have varied my choice of vocabulary, so it is not repetitive of my headline or opening.

I am now going to model writing the title and the first sentence for paragraph one and then I need you to check it against the success criteria for me.

So the title for for this section is "Happy and Healthy." And my first sentence is, "These scrumptious snacks, which are nutrient-rich, are the most satisfying and succulent gift you can give your taste buds." Now take a look at my success criteria.

It says, "I have written a relative complex sentence focusing on taste and communicating the unique selling point." Take a look at my sentence.

Spot how I have done this.

Pause the video.

I have used the relative clause, "which are nutrient-rich," and embedded it within the main clause.

Well done for spotting that.

I can tick that part of my success criteria.

Also, remember your general checks.

Capital letters and full stops, neat handwriting, and any punctuation for rules you know.

It's time for your task.

Write paragraph one of your persuasive advert.

Use the success criteria to help guide you.

Pause the video and do the task now.

well done for your fantastic writing.

I have loved seeing what you have written down.

Let's take a look at this model example and spot how and where it has met the success criteria.

"Happy and Healthy.

These blissful bites, which are healthy and nutritious, are the most mouthwatering snack you'll ever taste.

They're coated in the creamiest, most scrumptious chocolate that will make your taste buds dance with joy.

Experience the crunch of the chocolate shell before it melts in your mouth.

Choose the champion chew to make your chocolate dreams come true." So, I have written a relative complex sentence focusing on taste and communicating the unique selling point.

Well, I can see my first sentence does this.

It has the relative clause, "which are healthy and nutritious," embedded within the main clause.

So I can tick that.

I have used a range of synonyms and adjectives to describe the product.

Well, I can see blissful bites, mouthwatering snack, champion chew.

I can see the adjectives scrumptious, healthy, and nutritious.

That is a wide range of synonyms and adjectives.

So I can tick that.

I have used a variety of persuasive linguistic techniques.

Well, I can see I've used superlatives.

The most mouthwatering snack you'll ever taste, and the creamiest, most scrumptious chocolate.

I have personification, tastebuds dance, onomatopoeia, crunch, and make your chocolate dreams come true.

Well that is a huge piece of exaggeration isn't it, but it makes it sound so persuasive and appealing to the reader.

So I can tick that one.

And I have varied my choice of vocabulary, so it is not repetitive of my headline or opening.

You'll need to compare this paragraph to your headline and opening to be sure of that.

But I know that my headline said "Energy Bouncing Balls," which I haven't repeated here, so I can tick that.

Well done for writing the first paragraph of your happy and healthy section.

We've now come to the end of our lesson, so let's go over a summary together.

The beginning of persuasive writing should focus on the most appealing aspects of the product.

For example, taste.

It's crucial to communicate the unique selling point of a product.

Use of a relative complex sentence supports communicating extra detail about a noun to the reader.

Using a range of adjectives and synonyms to avoid repetition is important in persuasive writing.

And a variety of linguistic techniques are used to create persuasive adverts.

I have really loved teaching you this lesson and I hope you have enjoyed learning.