Lesson video

Hi everyone.

My name is Ms. Voyle and welcome to today's lesson where you are going to be writing the final paragraph of your diary entry.

This unit is based on the story "Into the Forest" and you may wish to refer to it.

You will need a copy of the 2022 Walker Books Limited edition of "Into the Forest" by Anthony Browne.

You have also already written a plan for your writing today and it's important that you use this to support you.

Pause the video and get your copy of "Into the Forest" and your plan now.

Great.

Now I know you have the book and your plan with you.

During this lesson, you'll need to be listening and looking carefully.

There'll be tasks where you need somebody to talk to and you'll also need a piece of paper and pen or pencil for writing.

I hope you are feeling excited and ready to learn.

Let's get started.

The learning outcome for today's lesson is I can write the final paragraph of a diary entry based on "Into the Forest." Here are the key words for today's lesson.

Let's practise saying them.

My turn.

Your turn.

Emotions, present tense, rhetorical question.

Great job, well done.

Let's take a look at their definitions.

Emotions are strong feelings that result from a person's circumstances, mood or relationships with others.

Present tense refers to a verb form that indicates an action or state happening in the current moment and a rhetorical question is a question asked that does not expect an answer.

There are two parts to today's lesson.

In the first part, we will be preparing to write and in the second part you will be writing the final paragraph of your diary entry.

So let's begin with preparing to write.

Your diary entry can be structured like this.

Date and greeting.

The greeting is, "Dear Diary." Opening paragraph.

This is where you gave a general statement about the day and beginning of your recount.

Paragraph one.

This is where you gave a recount of the strange encounters in the forest.

And paragraph two.

This is where you will recount reaching grandma's house, finding dad, and returning home.

You have already written the date and greeting, the opening paragraph and paragraph one.

You have already planned paragraph two, and in today's lesson you will be writing this final paragraph.

We are going to continue writing a diary entry from the first person perspective of the boy in "Into the Forest." First person perspective is the point of view where the writer is the I character.

You are writing in character as the boy.

You will use pronouns like I, me and we because you are writing in the first person.

Diary entries use informal language.

This is because only the writer is reading their writing, so it does not need to be formal.

You are writing in character as the young boy from "Into the Forest" and your language choices should reflect this.

Here is an example.

Her voice sounded so strange and I was really freaked out.

This is a great example of informal language because there is exaggeration with the capitalization of so and freaked out is really emotive language.

Another example of informal language is the use of a contraction.

You will notice an apostrophe has been used in the word didn't here because this is a contraction of the two words did not.

Let's check your understanding.

Which of the following sentences would you expect to find in a diary entry? A, I was totally freaked out.

B, However it felt significantly strange.

Or C, She was really scared.

Pause the video and select the correct answer now.

The sentence that you would expect to find in a diary entry is A, I was totally freaked out.

This uses the first person and informal language.

B is too formal and C is written in the third person perspective.

So you would not find these sentences in your diary entry.

You will use the notes from your plan to form a range of sentences in your diary writing.

Here is an example of some of the notes we created for this final paragraph.

You developed precise vocabulary to describe what's happened and you developed thoughts and feelings including show and tell.

Let's take a look at a model of this final paragraph together and then we will consider how using a range of sentence types supports with text flow.

Listen carefully.

"As I paced it to grandma's house, I had an awful sense that I was being followed.

When I arrived, the voice inside didn't even sound like grandma's.

My heart pounded.

I was really freaked out about going in, but it turned out that grandma and dad were there.

Can you believe it? I told them everything and they gave me the biggest hug.

Today was honestly the scariest day, but I am so proud of myself for what I overcame.

I'm back home now and I feel relieved." The first sentence is an example of an adverbial complex sentence.

It begins with the adverbial subordinate clause, "As I paced it to grandma's house." And then has a comma to separate it from the main clause that follows.

A little further down, we can see an example of a great simple sentence.

"My heart pounded." This contains one main clause.

And then we can see an example of a compound sentence, where the coordinating conjunction "but" has been used to join two main clauses.

Let's check your understanding of the different sentence types.

Match each sentence type to the correct example.

We have A, simple sentence, B, compound sentence, C, adverbial complex sentence.

The sentence examples are, "I was super freaked out, but I went inside anyway." "When I arrived, the voice inside was strange and didn't sound like grandma." And "My heart pounded in my chest." Pause the video and match these now.

Let's take a look at the answers together.

The simple sentence is, "My heart pounded in my chest." This contains one main clause.

The compound sentence is, "I was super freaked out, but I went inside anyway." Here, the coordinating conjunction "but" has been used to join two main clauses.

And the adverbial complex sentence is, "When I arrived, the voice inside was strange and didn't sound like grandma." Here, the adverbial subordinates clause has begun the sentence, "When I arrived." Well done for demonstrating your understanding of the different sentence types.

A key linguistic feature in the final paragraph of a diary entry is the shift from past to present tense.

Listen carefully as I read this model to you.

"I was really freaked out about going in, but it turned out that grandma and dad were there.

Can you believe it? I told them everything and they gave me the biggest hug.

Today was honestly the scariest day, but I am so proud of myself for what I overcame.

I'm back home now and I feel relieved." Can you spot where the shift from past to present tense takes place? Pause the video and discuss with your partner.

Hopefully you spotted that the writing shifts into present tense here, "But I am so proud of myself for what I overcame.

I'm back home now and I feel relieved." You can write a compound sentence that begins in the past tense and shifts into the present tense in the second main clause.

Let's take a look at some examples.

I was really shaken earlier, but I feel so much better now.

It was the scariest day, but I am so proud of myself for my bravery.

Using the coordinating conjunction "but" shows a contrast between your emotions during the day, which is in the past tense and your emotions now, which is in the present tense.

Let's check your understanding.

True or false? I cannot use different tenses in the same sentence.

Pause the video and select your answer.

That is false.

Well done.

Now it's time to justify your answer.

A, I can use the coordinating conjunction "but" to show a contrast between my feelings in the past and my feelings in the present or B, I can use a mixture of verb tenses however I like.

Pause the video and select the correct justification.

The correct justification is A.

Well done.

You can use the coordinating conjunction "but" to show a contrast between your feelings in the past and your feelings in the present.

A rhetorical question is a question asked that does not expect an answer.

Take a look at this model right one more time.

Can you spot a rhetorical question? Pause the video and discuss with your partner.

Hopefully you spotted, "Can you believe it?" Rhetorical questions can be used to convey a character's thoughts and feelings.

In a diary entry, rhetorical questions most commonly express emotions such as surprise or confusion.

Let's take a look at some more examples.

Guess what? Who could it have been? Can you believe it? These rhetorical questions convey the boy's internal questions and emotions.

Let's check your understanding.

True or false.

A rhetorical question is meant to be answered.

Pause the video and select the correct answer.

That is false.

Well done.

Now it's time to justify your answer.

A, A person may use rhetorical questions to convey their emotions in a diary entry.

For example, surprise or confusion or B, rhetorical questions are meant to be funny for the reader of a diary entry.

Pause the video and select the correct justification.

The answer is A.

Well done.

A person may use rhetorical questions to convey their emotions in a diary entry.

For example, surprise or confusion.

It's now time for your first task and it is a talk task.

Say the first few sentences of your final paragraph.

Make sure you use your plan and include the following.

Precise vocabulary from your plan, including show and tell.

A shift from past to present tense to convey current feelings.

And a rhetorical question.

You can use the following sentence starters to help you.

As I ran towards grandma's.

Here, complete the sentence with a main clause that conveys heightened emotions for the boy.

Intense fear.

The following sentence could begin with a fronted adverbial followed by I had a horrid feeling that.

Here, complete the main clause.

Pause the video and orally rehearse your sentences now.

Welcome back.

Well done for orally rehearsing your sentences.

I loved listening to you.

Let's take a look at a good example together.

"As I ran towards grandma's, I had a horrid feeling that I was being followed.

When I arrived at the house, it didn't even sound like grandma inside.

My heart was pounding in my chest.

I was terrified to open the door, but I found grandma and dad on the other side.

Can you believe it? Today was a rollercoaster of emotions, but at least we are safely home now." Let's take a look at how the necessary linguistic features have been included here.

So for precise vocabulary from the plan, including show and tell.

We have a horrid feeling that I was being followed, arrived at the house, didn't sound like grandma, my heart was pounding in my chest.

That's a great example of show and tell.

Terrified to open the door.

For a shift from past to present tense to convey current feelings.

This takes place in the final sentence.

Today was a rollercoaster of emotions, but at least we are safely home now.

This is a compound sentence, whether coordinating conjunction "but" has been used to contrast between the past and the present.

And for a rhetorical question we can spot, "Can you believe it?" Well done again for orally rehearsing your sentences.

I hope you are feeling really ready and excited to write the final paragraph of your diary entry.

It's now time for the second and most exciting part of the lesson where you are going to be writing the final paragraph of your diary entry.

When we write, we always try to do these things.

Plan and say each sentence before we write it.

Use punctuation where we know the rules.

Vary our sentence types.

Write letters neatly on the line in joined handwriting.

Sound out words to spell them accurately.

And read our sentences out loud to check they make sense and edit to improve our writing if necessary.

Here is the success criteria for your writing today.

Listen carefully, I will read it to you.

I have used the linguistic features of a diary entry, first person perspective, shift from past to present tense and informal language.

I have used precise and ambitious vocabulary from my plan to recount events and convey emotions.

I have written at least one rhetorical question to convey surprise or confusion, and I have included a compound sentence using "but" to contrast between past and present tense.

You should use your plan to help you structure your writing today.

Pause the video and make sure you have your plan with you.

Great.

Now I know you have your plan with you.

I am now going to share a model of the beginning of this paragraph of the diary entry with you, and then I will need your help checking it against the success criteria.

Listen carefully.

"As I sped towards grandma's, my pulse raced.

I was convinced somebody was following me, but who could it be? Finally, I arrived.

I was terrified because it didn't even sound like grandma inside.

I nervously went in and discovered that grandma was okay and dad was there too.

They hugged me tight and I exhaled deeply." Can you now check my writing against the success criteria? See if you can spot where I met each point.

Pause the video and discuss with your partner.

Thank you so much for checking my writing against the success criteria.

You did a great job at spotting how I'd met it.

Let's take a look at the answers together.

So for linguistic features of a diary entry, we can see lots of use of the first person pronoun I, which means it has been written in first person perspective.

For the shift from past to present tense, that has not yet taken place, but that's okay.

I know that's to come.

And for examples of informal language, we can see a contraction "didn't" and we can see a capitalised word "And" so we can take that first point.

For ambitious vocabulary from my plan to recount events and convey emotions, we can see sped towards grandma's, my pulse raced.

Great examples of show and tell that convey emotions.

Convinced somebody was following me, terrified, didn't even sound like grandma inside.

So lots of important and ambitious vocabulary from the plan and we can tick that.

For a rhetorical question to convey surprise or confusion.

We can see, "but who could it be?" So we can tick that point.

And you were great at spotting that I have not yet used a compound sentence to contrast between the past and present tense.

So I won't tick that point yet, but I know that I need to do that next.

It's now time for you to do your writing.

Indent the first sentence.

Use the success criteria and your plan to help you write this paragraph of your diary entry.

Pause the video and do your writing now.

Welcome back.

Well done for writing the final paragraph of your diary entry.

It's now time for you to read your writing back, to check it to make sense and edit any punctuation errors.

You should also check your writing against the success criteria and tick each box once you are sure you have met it.

Pause the video and do this now.

Well done for reading over your writing, reflecting on it and making any necessary edits and improvements.

I am sure you did a great job at meeting the success criteria.

Let's now take a look at a good example together.

Listen carefully.

"As I ran towards grandma's house, I became even more terrified.

I had this awful feeling I was being followed.

When I finally arrived, it didn't even sound like grandma inside.

The fear took over me and my heart pounded in my chest.

Guess what? Not only was grandma okay, but dad was inside too.

I was so relieved.

I told them all about my scary journey and they hugged me tightly.

Honestly, today was such a difficult day, but I am so proud of myself for being brave.

I am finally back home with mom and I feel so grateful.

It is time to get some rest because I am exhausted.

Until next time." Let's now check this against the success criteria.

So for linguistic features of a diary entry, we can see use of the first person pronoun I, which means it has been written in the correct perspective.

We can see past tense verbs, as I ran, I didn't, the fear took over me.

We can see examples of informal language, didn't is a contraction, so is capitalised which is exaggeration, and we can see a shift into present tense near the end.

"I am so proud of myself for being brave." So we can tick that.

For ambitious vocabulary from the plan to recount events and convey emotions, we can see even more terrified, awful feeling, the fear took over me and my heart pounded in my chest.

That's great show and tell.

I was so relieved, so proud of myself, finally back home with mom and I feel so grateful, I am exhausted.

So lots of emotions and key vocabulary from the plan and we can tick that.

For at least one rhetorical question.

I can see the rhetorical question, "Guess what?" So we can tick that.

And the final point on the success criteria, a compound sentence using "but" to contrast between past and present tense.

This is where we shifted from the past to the present tense.

Honestly, today was such a difficult day.

That first main clause is in past tense, but that's my coordinating conjunction.

I am so proud of myself for being brave.

That second main clause is in present tense, so we can tick that point.

Well done for your hard work completing your diary entry from the perspective of the boy in "Into the Forest." We've now come to the end of our lessons.

So let's go over a summary together.

This paragraph recounts the final part of the boy's journey and his reunion with his dad in the past tense.

The boy's emotions heighten and he experiences intense fear before experiencing great relief.

A key linguistic feature in the final paragraph of a diary entry is the shift from past to present tense.

Present tense writing at the end of a diary entry conveys current reflections and feelings.

And rhetorical questions can be used to convey internal questions and emotions in a diary entry.

Well done again for your hard work in today's lesson.

I have thoroughly enjoyed teaching you.