Lesson video

Hi everybody, I'm Miss Gardner, and welcome to your next lesson from our unit, "The Happy Prince" reading and narrative writing.

I hope you've been enjoying this unit as much as I have.

I'm really looking forward to today's lesson because we are going to be doing some more writing, so let's get started.

In today's lesson from our "The Happy Prince" unit, we are going to be writing the next section of our narrative.

So your learning outcome is, I can write the buildup of "The Happy Prince".

Let's start by looking at the keywords.

We'll do my turn, your turn.

Text flow, apostrophe for possession, relative clause, direct speech.

Let's have a look at what these mean.

Text flow is how a text is written to keep the reader engaged.

An apostrophe for possession is a punctuation mark used to show if a noun belongs to another noun.

A relative clause is a type of subordinate clause that starts with a relative pronoun.

And we write direct speech to show that a character is speaking out loud in a text.

So there are two sections of our lesson today.

In the first, we'll be preparing to write.

And in the second, we'll be writing our buildup.

So let's start with preparing to write.

"The Happy Prince" can be structured like this.

An opening, which we've already written, buildup, a climax, and then a resolution.

In today's lesson, we are writing the buildup.

The purpose of the buildup is to do all of these, develop the plot and characters, and build up the tension and excitement.

In this buildup, we really developed the main characters, the prince and the bird, and also the citizens.

So the prince, what happened to the prince in the buildup? He described the suffering that was causing him so much sadness.

He sacrificed his own happiness and comfort, so he gave away his jewels and his eyes and his gold leaves in order to help others.

He was very firm with the bird, told the bird what to do, ignored all of the bird's concerns.

And then the bird does what the prince tells him to do.

But the bird became more and more concerned and worried with the prince's wellbeing, but he did not leave the prince's side.

This all happened in the buildup.

And then also, the citizens, the people in the city, they became much happier, healthier, and were suffering less throughout the buildup as the prince and the bird were helping them more and more.

So, just checking for understanding.

In the buildup of "The Happy Prince", A, the bird becomes weaker and frailer, B, the prince and the bird help more and more people, C, the bird rests on the prince's feet.

And, D, the prince sacrifices more of his own wellbeing.

Pause the video now.

That's right, it was B, the bird and the prince helped more and more people.

And D, the prince was sacrificing more of his own wellbeing.

Great job, well done.

So let's just review quickly the notes from our plan, because we want to make sure we are including the notes in chronological order in our writing today.

So the first key moment, the prince described the suffering of the seamstress and her unwell son.

And here was some of the vocabulary that we generated in our previous planning lesson.

Far away in a narrow street, with a mournful look in his eye, sadly.

These are all fronted adverbials.

And then also, the distressing sight of seeing the seamstress.

The poor, long-suffering seamstress and her sickly son.

And then the second moment where the prince took, sorry, the bird took the prince's ruby to the seamstress and he flapped his wings to help the boy feel better.

On our plan, we had immediately, immediately the bird went.

Through the quiet city and quickly, describing how the bird flew.

And then also, he soared determinedly, gently flapped its fragile wings, and the boy's pale face brightened.

And finally, the prince sacrifices eyes and gold leaves, this concerned the bird.

And we had the beautiful sapphire and the shimmering gold to describe the prince.

He selflessly sacrificed, and then the reluctant, concerned bird.

And then the dialogue, because we want to include speech in our writing today was, "Take out my other eye and give it to that girl." "I cannot take out your other eye, you will not be able to see," said the bird.

And then the prince replied, "Take my gold leaves too, and give them to the poor people." So all of these notes on our plan, we want to think about making them part of full sentences to include in our buildup.

So this section needs to include the following.

Ambitious vocabulary, which we definitely will, because we've got it on our plan.

So that includes precise adjectives, adverbs, and verbs, sentences written in the past tense, fronted adverbials, direct speech.

And then text flow, we want to have a range of simple, compound, and complex sentences.

So let's think about using our plan.

We can use the notes from our plan to form full sentences.

These notes on our plan contain really precise and descriptive vocabulary that we can use to create a vivid picture for the reader.

So you can see here the notes that we made on our plan.

We want to include a range of sentence types in our writing to improve our text flow.

So let's think about how we can use these notes, and write them as full sentences.

After the bird had said he would help, the prince described the distressing sights.

With a mournful look in his eye, he told the bird about the poor, long-suffering seamstress.

Sadly, her son was very sickly, but she was unable to help him.

So you can see here I haven't just copied off my plan, because the plan is not in full sentences.

What I have done is include the ambitious and precise vocabulary that we had in our plan in a range of sentence types.

So checking for understanding, true or false? When I write the buildup, I can just copy out my plan.

Pause the video now.

That is false.

Can you use A or B to justify your answer? A, I should use the notes in my plan to form a range of sentences.

Or B, I should reorder the events from my plan.

Pause the video now.

That is A, we don't want to reorder the events from our plan because we've written them in chronological order, so we should stick to that order when we are writing our buildup, well done.

So let's look at these sentences that we've just formed from the plan, think about how we've included a range of sentence types.

So our first sentence started with an adverbial clause, after the bird had said he would help.

And it came before a main clause, the prince described the distressing sights.

So we formed an adverbial complex sentence here.

Then we've got a simple sentence, which begins with a fronted adverbial, with a mournful look in his eye.

And then we have our main clause, he told the bird about the poor, long-suffering seamstress.

So we have a simple sentence now.

So already, we've got an adverbial complex sentence and a simple sentence.

And then our final sentence includes the coordinating conjunction, but, to join two main clauses.

Sadly, her son was very sickly and she was unable to help him.

So we formed a compound sentence as well.

Simple compound and an adverbial complex sentence, all from the notes in our plan.

So we've included a wide range of sentence types, which we know is important to improve text flow.

So let's think now about another type of complex sentence.

We know about two types of subordinate clause.

An adverbial clause, for example, after he had dropped the valuable stone with the mother, the bird began to gently flap his wings.

After he had dropped the valuable stone with the mother begins with the subordinating conjunction after.

So it's the subordinate adverbial clause.

But there are many more other examples of subordinating conjunctions, such as as, when, while.

Now, another type of subordinate clause is a relative clause.

For example, the seamstress, who was very poor, was unable to help her son.

The relative clause begins with a relative pronoun.

In this sentence, it's who.

And the relative pronoun is adding extra detail about the noun, the seamstress.

So there are two types of relative clause, relative pronouns that we know, which and who, and they start our relative clause.

And we want to think about including a relative complex sentence in our writing today.

So let's think about that in a bit more detail.

In a relative complex sentence, the relative clause can interrupt the main clause after the noun or the noun phrase it links to.

So, for example, the poor, exhausted citizens were now happier and brighter.

The poor, exhausted citizens is your noun phrase.

We want to add extra information about that noun, so we're going to add in a relative clause.

The poor, exhausted citizens, who had suffered for so long, were now happier and brighter.

So you can see here, the relative clause interrupted the main clause to add extra information about the noun.

The rules we need to remember here about commas are really important.

So you can see at the bottom of the screen, we have the main clause split in two.

And then you have a comma before the subordinate relative clause, and then a comma after the subordinate relative clause.

So those two commas makes it really clear when the relative clause starts and ends.

And here you have then a relative complex sentence.

So checking for understanding, true or false? This relative clause complex sentence is punctuated correctly.

The prince who did not care about his jewels or gold was determined to help.

Pause the video now.

That is false.

Can you use A or B to justify your answer? A, commas must go either side of a relative clause when it interrupts the main clause in a complex sentence.

Or B, commas are needed in a complex sentence to separate the main and subordinate clauses.

Pause the video now.

That's right, it is A, commas need to go on either side of the relative clause.

So it should say, the prince, comma, who did not care about his jewels or gold, comma, was determined to help.

Well done.

So dialogue is the written conversation between two characters or more within a narrative.

It is used to help move the action forward in a narrative.

Here is the most important dialogue in the buildup.

The prince said first, "Another girl needs our help." "Take out my other eye and give it to her." The bird responded, "I cannot take out your other eye, you will not be able to see." So the prince prince replied to that, "Take out my gold leaves too and give them to the poor people." So we need to remember to include this dialogue in our buildup today.

However, we need to remember to include speech punctuation.

We use direct speech to show that a character is speaking out loud.

And each time there is a new speaker, you need to remember to start a new line, so it's really clear that somebody new is speaking.

Direct speech is shown to the reader using inverted commas, they look like this.

The inverted commas tell us where the words the character said begin and end.

So we're going to think now about a speech second.

A speech second sentence always follows the same steps.

So here is our direct speech.

The prince demanded, "Take my gold leaves and give them to the poor." We started with a capital letter for the, because it's the start of our sentence.

Then we had our reporting clause, the prince demanded.

Then at the end of the reporting clause and before the speech begins, you have a comma.

Then it's the start of the speech, so you need your first set of inverted commas.

Then you have a capital letter at the start of speech, then it's your speech.

And then punctuation to end the speech before your final set of inverted commas.

So now, the reporting clause comes at the start of the sentence.

So it has to have a capital letter.

And the reporting clause is now always followed by a comma.

So checking for understanding.

Where should a capital letter and inverted commas be added to make this a direct speech second sentence? The concerned bird exclaimed, "I cannot take out your other eye, you will not be able to see." And these are the words that are said out loud.

So pause the video now, and decide where you need to add in a capital letter and inverted commas, off you go.

Okay, so here's the sentence correctly punctuated.

You have your capital letter for the, the first word of the reporting clause.

Then you have a comma at the end of the reporting clause, then an inverted comma to start the speech, capital letter at the start of speech, your speech, and then you have your closing inverted commas, well done.

So a noun is a person, a place, or a thing.

Nouns can be singular or plural.

A singular or plural noun can possess another singular or plural noun.

For example, a son belonging to the seamstress, the gold leaves belonging to the prince.

When a singular noun possesses another noun we usually add an apostrophe S to the first noun.

This is called an apostrophe for singular possession.

For example, the prince's eye, the prince possesses the eye.

The statue's golden leaves, the statue possesses the golden leaves.

The bird's beak, the bird possesses the beak.

These are all singular nouns, and so we use an apostrophe S to show that these nouns belong to the singular noun.

If the singular noun that owns a noun ends in S, we need to be careful.

We need to put the apostrophe after the S, we do not add another S, let's have a look.

The seamstress' son, the seamstress' house.

The seamstress is a singular noun ending in S.

So you have your apostrophe after the S, and before the noun that belongs to the singular noun.

So checking for understanding.

Which sentence shows its possession correctly with an apostrophe? A, the seamstress's son was very sickly.

B, the seamstress son's was very sickly.

C, the stream seamstress' son was very sickly.

Pause the video now.

That's right, it is C.

The seamstress is a singular noun that ends in S.

So the apostrophe for possession has to come after the final S.

Great job, well done.

It's time for task A.

You need to say the first few sentences of the buildup.

Make sure you include the following for text flow, precise and ambitious vocabulary from your plan, fronted adverbials, and a range of sentence types, including a relative complex sentence.

Use these sentence scaffolds to help you.

The prince, who.

And sadly, the seamstresses' son, and then you can carry on.

So pause the video now and off you go, saying these sentences out loud.

Okay, well done.

Welcome back.

Let's read these sentences out loud together.

The prince, who was very distressed by what he saw, told the bird about a poor, long-suffering mother.

Sadly, the seamstresses' son was very sickly, but she was unable to help him.

With a mournful look in his eye, the prince asked the compassionate bird to take her his ruby.

So we've included lots of ambitious vocab from the plan, distressed, long-suffering, sickly, mournful, compassionate.

We've included two fronted adverbials, sadly, and with a mournful look in his eye.

And we've included a relative complex sentence, our first sentence, the prince, who was very distressed by what he saw, told the bird about a poor, long-suffering mother.

Well done everybody for task A.

You need to, you can pause the video now and have another go at saying these sentences out loud, otherwise, great job.

It's now time to write the buildup.

When we write, we always try to do these things.

Plan and say each sentence before we write it.

Use punctuation where we know the rules.

Showcase each sentence type we know.

Write letters neatly on the line in joined handwriting.

Use spelling strategies to spell words accurately, and check and improve our writing when we think we have finished.

Here is the success criteria for your writing today.

I have written at least two fronted adverbials.

I have included a relative complex sentence.

I have used an apostrophe for possession accurately, and I've included direct speech sentences with correct punctuation.

So you're going to use the success criteria to help you make sure you've included everything you need to.

So there are three key moments on your plan to describe in the buildup.

One, the prince described the suffering of the seamstress and her unwell son.

Two, the bird took the prince's ruby to the seamstress and he flapped his wings to help the boy feel better.

And three, the prince sacrifices eyes and gold leaves, this concerned the bird.

So you can use paragraphs in your writing today.

You can start a new paragraph to signal the start of a new idea or a new key moment.

But remember, it is important to indent at the beginning of each paragraph, so it's really clear that it is a new paragraph.

So let's have a look at a model section.

I'm going to read it out loud, and you can be checking if I've included everything I need to from my success criteria.

We'll start with the first paragraph.

With a mournful look in his eye, the prince described the distressing sights.

He told the bird about the poor seamstresses' sickly son, and he asked the compassionate bird to take her the dazzling ruby from his sword.

At once, the bird soared determinedly through the quiet streets to their house, and he dropped the jewel on the mother's desk.

As the bird gently flapped his wings near the child, the boy's pale face began to brighten and he quickly felt better.

So, what can I tick off my success criteria? I have included two fronted adverbials, with a mournful look in his eye, and, at once.

So I can tick that off.

And I've used an apostrophe for possession accurately.

I said the poor seamstresses' sickly son, and the mother's desk.

And I remembered that seamstress ended in S, so the apostrophe had to go at the end.

Okay, here's my next paragraph.

The selfless prince, who wanted to help the other suffering citizens, was willing to sacrifice his own comfort.

"Take out my other eye and give it to that girl," he instructed the bird.

The reluctant bird whispered, "I cannot take out your other eye, you will not be able to see." The prince was more worried about the others in the city.

He replied firmly, "Take my gold leaves too, and give them to the poor people." Soon, the citizens were brighter and happier than ever.

So, now what can I tick off my success criteria? I've said, the selfless prince, who wanted to help the other suffering citizens.

So I've included a relative complex sentence.

And I've included direct speech with correct punctuation, you can see all the speech sentences in green there, so I can give myself a tick.

So it's time for task B.

You now need to write the buildup of "The Happy Prince".

Make sure you use your success criteria and your plan to help you structure your paragraphs.

Remember, if you need to start a new paragraph, you need to indent the first word.

Pause the video now and off you go.

Well done everybody.

In a moment, you're going to read back through your buildup of "The Happy Prince" again.

Then you'll use your success criteria to help you check that you have included everything you needed in this section.

So if you've written at least two fronted adverbials, you can give yourself a tick.

If you've included a relative complex sentence, give yourself a tick.

If you've used an apostrophe for possession accurately, give yourself a tick.

And if you've included direct speech sentences with correct punctuation, give yourself a tick.

So pause the video now and go back, reading through your buildup again, off you go.

Well done everybody, great work today.

Here is a summary of everything we've learned.

We use notes from our plan to form full sentences.

Using a range of sentence types, simple, compound, and complex, improves text flow for the reader.

A relative complex sentence is formed of a main clause that's interrupted by a relative clause.

We use direct speech to show that a character is speaking out loud, and to move the action forward.

And when a singular noun possesses another noun, we use an apostrophe for possession.

Well done everybody, great job today.