Lesson video

Hello everyone, it's me, Miss.

Chu, and in this lesson, we are going to be writing the opening of "Whale Rider." Do you remember that in the opening we introduce the main character and we set the scene for the whole story.

So when you're ready, let's get started.

The lesson outcome is, I can write the opening of "Whale Rider." Here are the keywords for this lesson.

I'm going to let you read through the keywords and their definitions now.

The lesson outline looks like this.

First we are going to prepare to write and then we're going to write the opening.

So let's start preparing.

"Whale Rider" can be structured like this.

The opening, build-up, climax, and resolution.

In this lesson, we are going to be writing the opening.

The purpose of the opening is to do all of these things.

Engage the reader, introduce the characters, and introduce the setting.

The purpose of the opening is, is it A, to solve a problem, to introduce the characters, to build tension, or to introduce the setting? Pause the video and think about what the answers could be.

Okay, so the answers are to introduce the characters and to introduce the setting, well done.

Let's review the notes from a plan.

Let's look at the one of the key moments.

Paikea and her grandfather were riding on a bicycle.

The planned fronted adverbials were, "In the late afternoon, over the crest of the hill," and "One bright, sunny day.

Let's now look at the ambitious vocabulary that would go alongside this key moment.

"Young girl, sparkling sea, towering mountains," and "wind in her hair." Let's look at the second key moment.

Her grandfather was cycling whilst Paikea looked up at him.

The appropriate fronted adverbials for this key moment are here.

"Down towards the sea, happily, without a care in the world." And the ambitious vocabulary that would match would be, "stared up lovingly, breathtaking landscape," and "gazed out to sea." This third key moment, Paikea was holding onto Koro's Maori necklace.

The fronted adverbials for this key moment are, "carefully, gently, at the edge of the village." And then the ambitious vocabulary, "ancestors guiding, secure and safe, smooth, curved shell, contented girl." This section needs to include the following.

Ambitious vocabulary, that means using precise adjectives, adverbs and verbs.

References to the noun in different ways.

Sentences written in the past tense.

Fronted adverbials.

Text flow, that means using simple compound and complex sentences, a range of sentence types.

A simple sentence is formed of one main clause about one single idea.

We've got our main, which is one simple sentence.

For example, "One special day, a cheerful baby was born." The fronted adverbial, "one special day," gives extra detail to our main clause, "a cheerful baby girl was born." True or false? A simple sentence is formed of one main clause.

Pause the video and have a think about whether this is true or whether this is false.

Okay, so the answer is true.

Yes.

A simple sentence is a full sentence about one idea or a simple sentence does not contain any clauses.

A simple sentence is a full sentence about one idea, well done.

A compound sentence is formed of at least two equally important main clauses joined together with a coordinating conjunction.

There's our main, joined with a and or but, with another main.

And that forms our compound sentence.

Let's look at two main clauses that are of equal importance.

She rode on a bike.

And Paikea held his necklace.

These two ideas can be joined into one compound sentence with the coordinating conjunction, and.

Can you say, "And"? Lovely.

"Joyfully, the thoughtful, spiritual girl rode on the bike and she caressed the smooth exterior of his shell necklace." "Joyfully" is our fronted adverbial, "the thoughtful, spiritual girl" is our expanded noun phrase, "and" is our coordinating conjunction.

And we've got our descriptive adjective there, and that makes a really great compound sentence.

Which of the following is a compound sentence? "The girl rode the bike because she needed to get home." "The girl rode the bike and she held onto a precious necklace." "The girl rode down to the village." Pause the video and think about which of those sentences has two main clauses joined by a coordinating conjunction.

Okay, so hopefully you were able to see that B is our compound sentence because we have our main clause of "The girl rode the bike," joined by "and she held onto a precious necklace." The first one is actually a complex sentence because we have "The girl rode the bike," which is our main clause, joined by our subordinating conjunction, "because," and then we've got our subordinate clause, "she needed to get home." And then we have the final sentence, which is "The girl rode down to the village." is just a main clause, one idea, it's a simple sentence.

A complex sentence is formed of a main clause stretched with a subordinate adverbial clause that starts with a subordinating conjunction.

So we've got our main clause, and this time it's joined or stretched by a subordinating conjunction.

So we could have as, while, because, and there are a few more as well that haven't been listed here.

This forms our complex sentence.

Let's look at a main clause and a subordinate adverbial clause.

"While Paikea looked up at her grandfather, he cycled over the crest a hill." The first idea can be stretched with the second idea to make one complex sentence.

For example, "The girl looked up tenderly at her wise grandfather," which is our main clause, "while he cycled over the crest of the hill." And we stretched that main clause with our subordinate adverbial clause, starting with our subordinating conjunction, "while." So we've said, "The young girl," which is an interesting way to refer to the noun rather than just stating her name.

We've got a descriptive adjective to describe her grandfather.

We've got, "while" for our subordinating conjunction, and this forms our complex sentence.

True or false? This is a complex sentence.

"The girl rolled down the hill while gently clasping his Maori necklace." Is this true or is this false? Pause the video and have a think.

Okay, so we are going to say that this is, let me hear you say it, true, well done.

The subordinate adverbial clause starts with the subordinating conjunction, "while" and it is joined to the main clause.

Or is it, a complex sentence contains two clauses.

Which one is a more accurate description of why we think that sentence is a complex sentence? Well, it's A, isn't it? The subordinate adverbial clause starts with the subordinating conjunction, "while" and it is a join to the main clause.

Task A, say the first two sentences of the opening and make sure you include the following.

Ambitious vocabulary from your plan, a fronted adverbial, sentences in the past, and use these sentence scaffolds to help you.

"One bright, sunny day, mm." Use your plan.

"With the wind in her hair, mm." And use your plan.

Remember to use ambitious vocabulary.

You may use the fronted adverbials that are in the scaffolds, or you can choose your own and you must say your sentences in past tense.

Good luck and off you go.

Okay.

Some really great sentences there that I could hear.

Let's listen to this one.

"One bright, sunny day," that's a fronted adverbial from the scaffold, "a young girl rode on her bike with her grandfather towards the sparkling sea.

With the wind in her hair, Paikea stared up lovingly at her grandfather while he looked out towards the horizon." Have we got our ambitious vocabulary? Yes, we've described the girl, we've described the sea.

We've described how she stared up at her grandfather and what he was doing while he was looking out.

Have we included fronted adverbials? Yes, we've said, "One bright, sunny day." We said, "With the wind in her hair." And we have written all in past tenses.

Well done.

Let's now move on to writing the opening of "Whale Rider." When we write, we always try to do these things.

Plan and say each sentence before we write it.

Use punctuation where we know the rules.

Showcase each sentence type we know.

Write letters neatly on the line in joined handwriting.

And use spelling strategies to spell words accurately.

Finally, we check and improve our writing when we think we have finished.

Here is the success criteria for your writing today.

You're going to have written at least two fronted adverbials.

You're going to have used ambitious vocabulary from your plan, and you're going to have written a range of sentence types, simple, compound, and complex to improve text flow.

And I would have liked you to have written in past tense as well.

There are three key moments on your plan to describe in the first part of the opening.

The first key moment is Paikea and her grandfather are riding on a bicycle.

The second key moment is her grandfather was cycling and Paikea was looking up at him.

The third one is she held onto his necklace.

Let's look at a model opening.

I want you to just check that the success criteria is demonstrated in the opening paragraph.

I'm going to read it first.

"One bright, sunny day, a young girl rode on a bike with her grandfather towards the sparkling sea.

With the wind in her hair, carefree Paikea stared up lovingly at her grandfather while he looked out at the breathtaking landscape.

It was his home.

Thoughtfully, she caressed the smooth exterior of his shell necklace and she felt the calling of her ancestors." I'm going to check now.

Have I written at least two fronted adverbials? Let's see, "One bright, sunny day," that's one, "With the wind in her hair," that's two, and "thoughtfully," that's three.

So I have written at least two.

I can tick that one off.

Have I used ambitious vocabulary? Let's have a look.

"Sparkling" to describe the sea, "carefree" to describe Paikea, "stared up lovingly," "breathtaking landscape." And "caressed" to describe the way she touched the shell and "smooth exterior" to describe the shell.

So yes, I have.

I'm going to move on now to have I written in the past tense? "Rode," "stared," "looked," "felt," yes, all my verbs are in the past tense, so I can tick that one off.

And then finally, I want to check that I've written a range of sentence types.

So I have the first sentence, "A young girl rode on her bike with her grandfather towards the sparkling seas," are my simple sentence, I also have, "It was his home." That's also another simple sentence.

Then let's move on to our compound sentence that's in my final sentence.

"Thoughtfully, she caressed the smooth exterior of his shell necklace and she felt the calling of her ancestors." The "and" coordinating conjunction there to join my two main clauses makes that a compound sentence.

Then finally, have I got my complex sentence? "With the wind in her hair, carefree Paikea stared up lovingly at her grandfather while," that's my subordinating conjunction, "he looked out at the breathtaking landscape." forming my main clause and my subordinate clause, and that is my complex sentence, so I can tick that one off.

Now it's your turn to write.

I'd like you to indent your first sentence when you are writing and use the success criteria, like I have, and your plan to help you structure your opening paragraph.

Good luck and I can't wait to read them after you have finished.

Now I would like you to read back your opening.

Use your success criteria to help you check that you have included everything needed in this section.

Then once you have done that, tick off everything in your success criteria.

To summarise, the purpose of the opening is to engage the reader and to introduce the setting and characters.

Using a range of simple compound and complex sentences improves text flow for the reader.

Fronted adverbials of time, place or manner add extra detail to the main clause.

This narrative version of "Whale Rider" is written in the past tense.

Oral rehearsal before writing helps to structure grammatically correct sentences and check for sense.

I hope you enjoyed writing the opening of "Whale Rider." Goodbye.