Lesson video

Hi everyone and welcome to today's lesson.

Today, we're going to be using our planning to help us write the second main body paragraph of our persuasive letter.

By the end of today's lesson, you will have written the second part of the main body of a persuasive letter inspired by the text "Front Desk".

Here are some key words we're going to use: formal tone, evidence, persuasive technique.

Formal tone is the effect created by choosing serious factual language.

Evidence are pieces of facts or statistics used to back up a point.

Persuasive techniques are a structure or device used in writing to try to change someone's mind or their behaviour.

Today, we are going to be writing part two of the main body of a persuasive letter inspired by a text.

We're going to begin by preparing to write and then we're going to move on to writing part two of the main body.

Our persuasive letter can be structured like this.

We have an introduction.

Point one is all about the physical health benefits of the community playground, and point two is all about the mental health benefits.

And finally, our conclusion.

The introduction is the first paragraph of the letter.

It states the letter's purpose, main arguments or points.

The main body paragraphs explore key persuasive points in detail, backed up by evidence.

And the conclusion paragraph summarises the key information of the letter and it outlines the letter's next steps.

We've already written our introduction and point one, which was all about the physical health benefits of the playground.

We've already planned our point two paragraph, so today we're going to move on to writing it.

The purpose of a main body paragraph is to do all of these things.

We want to engage our reader, specify a key argument, and give the reader specific information.

Specific information is factual and detailed.

We can use this visual to help us remember that in the main body, our facts need to be detailed and specific.

When we write persuasively, there are several persuasive techniques we can use: flattery, presumption, veiled threats, evidence.

Using these techniques appropriately adds credibility to our writing.

How credible our letter sounds means how trustworthy or reasonable it is.

If we write with strong credibility, our recipient is much more likely to be persuaded and want to help us.

Match the persuasive techniques to their examples.

So down the left hand side, I've got presumption, flattery, evidence or proof, and veiled threat.

Let's read the examples together before you start your task.

I have no doubt you will agree that.

Research from Action for Children proves that.

Such a forward-thinking council member.

I would hate to think that constituents may vote for your opponent if this matter were to be neglected.

Pause the video while you complete your task.

Great work everyone.

Presumption was, I have no doubt you will agree that.

Flattery was, such a forward-thinking council member.

Evidence or proof was research from Action for Children proves that.

And veiled threat was, I would hate to think that constituents may vote for your opponent if this matter were to be neglected.

Great work.

How can we add credibility to the point that the playground would benefit children's mental health? Pause the video while you complete your task.

Well done if you spotted the A, including evidence from credible newspaper articles, B, quoting data and statistics from trusted sources, and C, writing in a formal tone, all help create a strong, credible argument.

This is much more persuasive than an argument where the points are not backed up by solid evidence or proof.

Now, it's time for your first task.

Consider the key argument of the next paragraph of the main body that the community playground will benefit children's mental health.

Note down at least two pieces of evidence or personal experiences to add credibility to this claim.

If quoting research, make sure to include the source of the information.

You could use these sentence scaffolds to help you.

Let's read them together.

According to, hmm, official data.

From my own personal experiences.

Pause the video while you complete your task.

Well done.

Here are a few example sentences that could have been written.

According to the NHS's official data, children who are physically active for a daily average of 60 minutes significantly improve their sleep, which has a direct effect on their mental wellbeing.

From my own personal experiences, I have noticed improved mood and self-regulation when I regularly spend time outside in nature.

Take a moment to reread your sentences.

Do they help back up the point that the playground would be beneficial to children's mental health? Well done.

Neither we have prepared ourselves for writing, we're going to move on to writing part two of the main body.

When we write, we always try to do these things.

We plan and say each sentence before we write it.

We use punctuation when we know the rules.

We showcase each sentence type we know.

We write letters neatly on the line in joined handwriting.

We use spelling strategies to spell words accurately.

And we check and improve our writing when we think we have finished.

This is the success criteria that you are going to use today.

Let's read it through together.

I have maintained a formal tone throughout the paragraph.

I have used evidence to enhance my writing's credibility.

I have used other persuasive techniques appropriately.

I have used a range of sentence types.

You're going to use your plan to write the second main body paragraph of your persuasive letter.

You're going to build on your ideas from your plan when writing today.

Because remember, our plans have been written in bullet points and note form and we need to convert those notes into full sentences.

Make sure that you have your plan with you ready for writing.

If you need to, pause the video while you go and get it.

Let's review our planning for the main body before we begin writing.

So our plan had three clear sections: introductory sentence, specific information, and linking sentence.

Here's my plan.

Let's read through my one first and then you'll have time to go back and read through your plan.

So in my introductory sentence, I included these notes.

In addition to this, comma, or as well as the physical health benefits, comma.

Another integral benefit of the playground would be.

Here, I've included my specific information notes.

The NHS has reported an increase in children needing mental health support.

Increased screen time and lack of outdoor play spaces has correlated with a rise in loneliness.

The playground would feature play areas and natural areas.

It would promote time spent outdoors and socialisation.

This is proven to improve children's wellbeing.

Here are the notes from my linking sentence.

Remember, here we want to summarise the main body's arguments.

So that's the key arguments from paragraph one and paragraph two of the main body.

I'm certain you will agree that this is an urgent matter or I could say it as this is an issue of the utmost importance.

The park or the playground would benefit both the physical and mental wellbeing of children and young people.

Take a moment now to reread your planning and double check that you are happy with it and that if you would like to add any further ideas to your plan, you can pause the video and do that now.

Well done everyone.

Now, we're going to look at a model that I have written.

You are going to help me check how it has met the success criteria.

So here I've got the success criteria down the site.

Let's read this example together.

In addition to the physical health benefits, the playground would offer many positive outcomes for children's mental wellbeing.

According to Action for Children, increased use of social media has led to increased instances of cyberbullying.

I am sure you will agree that it is vital that local councils create opportunities for children to spend time off their screens and social media building strong peer relationships in person instead.

Local constituents who have noted the lack of outdoor place spaces nearby have informed me that children's mental and physical health is an urgent issue.

Surely, you cannot afford to ignore such a pressing matter ahead of upcoming elections.

So I have got a clearly written main body paragraph two.

Let's see how well it's met my success criteria though.

So formal tone throughout my paragraph, first of all, I think that I've included some key language here.

So for example, offer many positive outcomes according to Action for Children.

It is vital, local constituents.

You cannot, rather than using contracted words like can't, I'm using the full versions.

These all help to create a formal tone.

So this is how I've met my success criteria number one.

Number two, using evidence to enhance my writing's credibility.

So where have I referred to research or personal experience or facts to back up my point.

Here, according to Action for Children, increased use of social media has led to increased instances of cyberbullying.

So here I've quoted research from a charity.

And on this, my other example, local constituents who have noted the lack of outdoor play spaces nearby have informed me that children's mental and physical health is an urgent issue.

Here, I've included anecdotal evidence from where I've spoken to local constituents or people who live in the local community.

So I have used evidence to enhance my writing's credibility.

Remember, thinking about my recipient, their counsellor, they're going to want to know what local constituents have got to say.

Number three, I have used other persuasive techniques appropriately.

So I am sure you will agree that this is an example of presumption.

Surely, you cannot afford to ignore such a pressing matter ahead of upcoming elections.

This is an example of veiled threat.

'Cause remember, we know that our counsellors are going to want to be reelected.

So using the threat of upcoming elections is very effective.

So I can say I've met success criteria number three.

And finally, using a range of sentence types.

So according to Action for Children is an example of a non-finite subordinate clause.

So this is an example of a non-finite complex sentence.

Building strong peer relationships in person instead is also an example of a non-finite subordinate clause.

This time it's been moved to go at the end of the sentence.

So I've shown variation in how I structure those two relative clauses.

And who have noted lack of outdoor play spaces nearby is an example of a relative clause using who as the relative pronoun.

So this is an example of a relative complex sentence.

I can therefore say I've used a range of different sentence types in my writing.

It's really important to do this because it helps to keep our writing cohesive, keeps the reader engaged, and allows variation across different sentences.

Now that we've read my example and assessed it against the success criteria, you are going to use your plan and success criteria to write the second main body paragraph of your persuasive letter.

You've got your success criteria visible on the screen to help you.

Pause the video while you complete your task.

Brilliant work everyone.

Take a moment to read your paragraph back and check that it meets the success criteria.

Well done.

Here's another example of what we might have written.

Let's read it together.

Furthermore, as well as children's physical health, we must also prioritise their mental wellbeing.

I am sure that you will be aware that an increasing number of children are spending time indoors online.

As a result, schools and mental health services have seen an increase in pupils who report feelings of isolation and loneliness.

Therefore, it is vital that we address this issue and provide children with safe spaces to learn and play outside.

Of particular significance, it is not only the wellbeing of our children at stake, but it is also the reputation of our esteemed council.

By neglecting this opportunity to prioritise the needs of our community's youth, you risk losing the trust of your constituents.

Take a final chance to reread your writing, and if there are any ideas you would like to magpie from my model and add to yours, you can do that now.

Well done everyone.

We can see that in my example that I've just shown you, I have achieved formal tone, I've used evidence to enhance my writing's credibility, I've used other persuasive techniques appropriately and a range of sentence types.

Take a moment to check that you have met all of your success criteria.

Well done.

Brilliant work everyone.

That now brings us to the end of our session where today, we've been writing part two of the main body of a persuasive letter.

The main body paragraphs of a persuasive letter should be factual, specific, and detailed, and written in a formal tone.

Writers can use a range of persuasive techniques to help achieve the letter's purpose.

Using a range of sentence types and structures improves text cohesion.

Writers should use their plans and success criteria to guide them during the writing process.

I hope you're feeling so proud of the writing you've produced in our lesson today everybody.

Well done for all of your hard work.