Lesson video

Hi everyone, and welcome to today's lesson.

My name is Ms. Mullins, and today we're going to be doing some writing.

So let's get started.

By the end of today's lesson, you'll be able to write the first recount paragraph of a journalistic report about the Titanic.

In this paragraph, we're going to be focusing on its design, construction, and purpose.

Here are some key words we're going to be using.

Passive voice.

The passive voice is a spoken or written voice in which the subject is acted upon by the verb.

Parenthesis.

Parenthesis is additional information that is added to a sentence.

If it is removed, the sentence still makes sense.

Relative complex sentence.

A relative complex sentence is a sentence formed of a main clause and a relative subordinate clause.

Adverbial complex sentence.

An adverbial complex sentence is a sentence formed of a main clause and an adverbial subordinate clause.

Today we're going to be writing the first recount paragraph of a journalistic report about the Titanic.

Firstly, we're going to prepare to write and then we'll move on to actually writing our recount section.

The layout of a journalistic report can look like this.

We start with a headline, then we have an opening, which gives the readers some general information about the event.

The recount section gives specific details that tell the reader about the event.

The quote section includes quotes from people who know more about the event, and the closing describes what is currently happening and what is likely to happen next.

So far in our unit, we've already written the opening, and today we are plan, we have already planned and we're going to write the first paragraph of our recount section.

The purpose is the aim of the text.

The purpose of the recount section is to engage the reader and give the reader specific information about the topic.

Here we want to give our reader some more detail about the Titanic's design and its structure and its purpose.

The paragraph follows a clear structure.

We begin with an introductory sentence, which introduces what the paragraph will be about.

Then we follow that with some specific information.

This gives the reader detailed information about an aspect of the topic.

And finally, we have a linking sentence, which links on to the next paragraph.

The the purpose of this section is to.

Pause the video while you decide.

Well done if you spotted that the purpose of this section is to engage the reader and give the reader specific facts.

Text cohesion is how a text flows to maintain the interest of the reader and achieve the text's purpose.

So far in our report, we have already been learning about subject-specific vocabulary, journalistic language, fronted adverbials.

We're also today going to be thinking a little bit more about parenthesis demarcated using brackets.

Well done.

Now, if we can use a combination of all of these cohesive devices, these together work really well to improve text cohesion.

So make sure that our writing flows really well, that we avoid it becoming repetitive, and we keep our reader engaged in what we are writing.

Match the cohesive devices to their definitions and pause the video while you do that.

Well done if you spotted that subject-specific vocabulary is vocabulary used when writing about a particular subject.

Journalistic language are words and phraseology used in journalistic reports.

A fronted adverbial is a sentence starter followed by a comma.

And parenthesis is additional information that is added to a sentence.

If it is removed, the sentence still makes sense.

Now it's time for your task.

Match the cohesive devices to their examples.

So we've already described, or we've already defined these cohesive devices.

Now your next challenge is to work out whether you can identify the examples of each cohesive device.

Pause the video while you do that.

Well done if you spotted that subject-specific vocabulary would be 'commodore'.

A commodore is the most senior captain for the shipping company, and that was Captain Smith.

Journalistic language would be, 'it has been reported that'.

A fronted adverbial would be 'notably', and parenthesis, '(885 crew and 1,200 passengers)'.

And we've marked that parenthesis using brackets.

A simple sentence is formed of one main clause.

A compound sentence is formed of at least two equally important main clauses joined together by a coordinating conjunction.

I like to imagine it as almost a pair of scales and the scales have to be even, okay? So on either side of my scales, I've got one main clause, and on the other side of the sentence, I've got second main clause.

And they're both equally important, so they weigh the same, but what links them together in the middle here is the coordinating conjunction.

There are three coordinating conjunctions, 'and', 'or', 'but'.

Well done.

When we use 'or' or 'but' as coordinating conjunctions, you can see there on our Lego pieces that we use a comma in front of them, but we do not use a comma in front of 'and' when we use it as a coordinating conjunction.

Let's look at some examples now.

Let's read this main clause together.

"Titanic was designed by Thomas Andrews".

There's one main clause if I imagine one side of my weighing scale.

"And.

.", linking on, "It was built at Harland and Wolff Shipyard." Here now I've got a full compound sentence.

Let's read the whole thing together.

"Titanic was designed by Thomas Andrews and it was built at Harland and Wolff Shipyard." There's an example of a compound sentence using the coordinating conjunction 'and' to link two similar ideas together.

So let's go back to our definitions again.

A simple sentence is formed of one main clause.

A compound sentence is formed of two equally important main clauses joined together by a coordinating conjunction.

Again, thinking about that weighing scale, main clause one, main clause two, they're both equally weighted 'cause they're equally important, and then joined in the middle with a coordinating conjunction.

There are three coordinating conjunctions, and those are 'and', 'or', and 'but'.

Your turn.

Well done.

And this little equation here shows us perfectly we've got one main in the middle, the option of one of those three coordinating conjunctions.

Then our second main creates a compound sentence.

Let's have another look at a different main clause.

So let's read this one together.

You might want to get your arm out and show your main clause with me.

"Captain Smith will retire in the coming months." There's my first mean clause.

"But.

." Showing a contrasting idea, "He will command Titanic on her maiden voyage beforehand." So this time, I've used the 'but' conjunction because I'm not adding two similar ideas, I'm adding a contrasting idea.

So even though he's going to retire soon, he is going to still move ahead with this very important task of commanding the Titanic.

So this is why it's appropriate to use the 'but' coordinating conjunction here to show two contrasting ideas.

Let's read this sentence all the way through together.

"Captain Smith will retire in the coming months, but he will command Titanic on her maiden voyage beforehand." Thank you for your help with that.

Now, we know that a subordinate clause is a group of words that contains a verb, but it does not make complete sense.

A subordinate clause must be joined with a main clause in order to make complete sense, and this is called a complex sentence.

We know two types of subordinate clause.

We have an adverbial subordinate clause and a relative subordinate clause.

They're both subordinate clauses in that they don't make sense on their own, but they are different.

An adverbial clause, here's an example.

Let's read it together.

"Because of the public excitement surrounding the Titanic, mass crowds gathered at Southampton quayside." I can see here my adverbial subordinate clause is written in purple.

Let's read it one more time.

"Because of the public excitement surrounding the Titanic," this is an example of an adverbial subordinate clause.

It begins with a subordinating conjunction 'because'.

A subordinating conjunction is always the first word of an adverbial subordinate clause.

Here are some examples we could also use.

Although, because, after, before.

We can also use 'as' and 'when' as adverbial subordinate clauses, as adverbial subordinating conjunctions as well.

Now let's look a little bit more to our relative clause.

Let's read this whole complex sentence together.

"Thomas Anderson, who is an expert marine engineer, designed the ship." And my relative subordinate clause is 'who is an expert marine engineer'.

We know that a relative clause begins with a relative pronoun, either 'which', or in this case, 'who'.

They're used to give additional information about a noun in the sentence.

Remember, we use the relative pronoun 'who' when the relative clause is about a person.

We use the relative pronoun 'which' when the relative clause is about anyone or anything else.

What tells us that 'because of the public excitement surrounding the Titanic' is an adverbial clause? Pause the video while you do that.

Great work if you spotted that, we know it's an adverbial clause because it doesn't make sense on its own and an adverbial clause is a type of subordinate clause.

It contains the verb 'surrounding'.

So remember, any clause is a group of words containing a verb, and the verb here is 'surrounding'.

So we know it's a clause 'cause it's got a verb in it.

It begins with the subordinating conjunction 'because', and that's how we know it's an adverbial subordinate clause.

A sentence that contains an adverbial clause connected to a main clause is called an adverbial complex sentence.

Here's an example of an adverbial complex sentence.

Let's read it together.

"Crowds gathered at Southampton quayside because of the public interest in this miracle of marine engineering." My subordinate adverbial clause here is in purple.

And we know that it's the subordinate clause because it begins with that subordinating conjunction 'because'.

That's the giveaway.

So here my complex sentence begins with my main clause and ends with the subordinate clause.

However, I can also do a little switch around.

So I can keep the words and the clauses the exact same, but change the order in the sentence.

So let's read this one together.

"Because of the public interest in this miracle of marine engineering, crowds gathered at Southampton quayside." Here I've started my sentence with my subordinate clause and followed it with my main clause.

The one thing we've got to remember though, when we start a sentence with a subordinate adverbial clause, we must remember to use a comma afterwards.

We don't need a comma when the main clause comes first, because we've got that subordinate conjunction, in this case, 'because' differentiating the two clauses.

But when the 'because' comes at the start of the sentence, we need something else to separate the subordinate clause from the main clause.

So that's why we need to have a comma after the subordinate clause when the subordinate clause comes first.

So the adverbial clause can come before or after the main clause, and we can experiment with writing these sentences in different ways.

Now it's time for your task.

Is the highlighted clause a relative clause or an adverbial clause? Pause the video while you complete the task.

Well done, everyone.

"The ship which was built in Belfast, Northern Ireland, took three years to build." This is an example of a relative clause because it has got a relative pronoun 'which' in it.

That's how we know.

"Captain Smith will command the ship before he begins his retirement in the coming months." Well, I can see that purple subordinate clause begins with the subordinate conjunction 'before'.

So it's adverbial.

"Although the Titanic is the largest ship ever built, it is also exceptionally fast." That word, 'although' is a subordinating conjunction.

So it's an adverbial clause.

And "Thomas Andrews, who designed the ship, has been applauded for his innovative engineering." That relative clause, that is a relative clause 'who designed the ship'.

And I know this because it begins with the 'who' relative pronoun.

Well done, everyone.

Now this brings us onto the second part of our lesson where now we're going to write the recount section.

When we write, we always try to do these things.

We plan and say each sentence before we write it.

We use punctuation where we know the rules.

We showcase each sentence type we know.

We write letters neatly on the line in joined handwriting.

We use spelling strategies to spell words accurately, and we check and improve our writing when we think we have finished.

Here's the success criteria we are going to be using today.

So firstly, we're going to include the passive voice.

We did a lot of learning about passive voice in our last lesson when we were planning to write our recount section.

I've included journalistic language and subject-specific vocabulary.

I've included parenthesis demarcated using brackets, and I have included at least one simple compound adverbial complex and relative complex sentence.

We're gonna be using our plans to write our recount section.

We can build on our plans when we are writing today.

Make sure you've got your plan with you ready for writing.

If you need to go and get it, pause the video now while you do so.

Before we come on to write, let's just remind ourselves of the structure of this paragraph in the recount section.

So first thing, we've got an introductory sentence that introduces what the paragraph will be about.

Remember in this paragraph, we're learning all about the Titanic's structure and design and purpose.

Then we are going to be telling our readers some specific information, giving the reader detailed facts about aspects of the event or the Titanic.

And finally, we're gonna end with a linking sentence, which links onto the next paragraph.

We're gonna use the same structure in our planning so that then when we come to write, our writing follows an appropriate flow and structure.

First of all, let's begin with our introductory sentence.

So check the relevant part of your plan.

This is where we explain to our reader that this part of the report is about the Titanic.

Here's what my plan says.

Take a moment to reread your plan.

Now it's time for you to draught your introductory sentence using your plan.

You might want to use my sentence opener.

'This vast naval wonder is.

' Pause the video now while you draught your introductory sentence.

Great work, everyone.

Here's what I've written down.

Remember, what I've got is gonna be different to what you have got, and that's great to have lots of different ideas.

My introductory sentence is "This vast naval wonder is allegedly the safest ship ever built and is also hailed as the largest moving manmade construction of all time." So in my introductory sentence, I have used a compound sentence with 'and' as my coordinating conjunction in my topic sentence.

I've also included some journalistic language and subject-specific vocabulary.

So journalistic language could be the word 'allegedly' and subject-specific vocabulary, a 'naval wonder', 'ship', 'manmade construction'.

All of those create that formal tone.

Now let's move on to our specific information section.

Make sure you've got the relevant part of your plan out in front of you.

Here's what my plan says.

Take a moment to reread your plan and make sure you have reminded yourself of what you want to write in this section.

Now you're going to use your plan to draught your specific information.

You could use my sentence scaffold "Titanic, which hmm.

was constructed by." So I've given you a scaffold there to help you bring in a relative complex sentence if you would like to.

Pause the video now while you do that.

Great work, everybody.

Here is my example.

So let's read it through together.

"Titanic, which was designed by Thomas Anderson, (a leading marine engineer), was constructed by White Star Line at the Harland and Wolff Shipyard, Belfast.

Before his retirement in the coming months, Captain E.

Smith, (the Commodore of White Star Line) is commander of the vessel." So in my sentence here, I have included some passive voice 'was designed by Thomas Anderson' and 'was constructed by White Star Line'.

Remember, a passive sentence is when the subject has the verb done to it.

Also, I've included some journalistic language and subject-specific vocabulary, such as 'constructed', 'White Star Line', 'Commodore', 'commander', 'vessel', lots of subject-specific vocabulary there.

I've included two examples of parenthesis using brackets.

So 'a leading marine engineer' and 'the Commodore of White Star Line'.

And finally, we're onto our linking sentence.

This links onto the next section.

Okay, so make sure you're looking at the relevant parts of your plan.

Here's my plan.

Take a moment to reread your plan and remind yourself of what you want to include in your linking sentence.

Now, it's time for you to use your plan to draught your linking sentence.

You could use my opener if you would like to.

"The luxury liner's primary purpose is.

." So this is where you're gonna tell your reader what the Titanic is actually used for.

Pause the video now while you complete your task.

Well done, everyone.

Here's my linking sentence, "The luxury liner's primary purpose is to transport passengers and cargo across the Atlantic.

Whilst Andrews' innovative engineering has received much praise on the global stage, it is believed that the Titanic's interiors are even more breathtaking." I have used journalistic language, such as 'it is believed that' and subject-specific vocabulary like 'passengers' and 'cargo' and 'Atlantic'.

I have also used a complex sentence here, 'Whilst Andrew's innovative engineering has received much praise on the global stage', that's an example of an adverbial subordinate clause.

So there's an adverbial complex sentence.

Now it's time for you to check your writing and make any edits or improvements that you need.

Remember, use your success criteria to help you with this.

Then rewrite your sentences as a full recount section and pause the video while you do that.

Well done, everyone.

Here's my recount section.

"This vast naval wonder is allegedly the safest ship ever built, and it is also hailed as the largest moving manmade construction of all time.

Titanic, which was designed by Thomas Anderson, (a leading marine engineer), was constructed by White Star Line at the Harland and Wolff Shipyard, Belfast.

Before he takes retirement in the coming months, Captain E.

Smith, (the Commodore of White Star Line) is commander of the vessel.

The luxury liner's primary purpose is to transport passengers and cargo across the Atlantic.

Whilst Andrews' innovative engineering has received much praise on the global stage, it is believed that the Titanic's interiors are even more breathtaking." I'm pretty proud, especially, of my linking sentence because in my linking sentence, my final sentence, I've summarised what I've been talking about in this paragraph by saying that, you know, the engineering has received much praise and it's really impressive.

But I've also linked on to the next paragraph, which is gonna be about the Titanic's interior.

So I've also kind of dropped that little seed for my reader to know that that's what's coming up next.

So I have included passive voice.

I have included journalistic language and subject-specific vocabulary.

I have included parenthesis marked using brackets, and I've used a simple, a compound, an adverbial complex, and a relative complex sentence.

Take the time now just to double check and reread your full recount section and check off your success criteria.

Well done, everyone.

That now brings us to the end of our lesson.

Today, we've been writing the first recount paragraph of a journalistic report about the Titanic.

A clause is a group of words containing a verb.

A subordinate clause is a group of words containing a verb that does not make sense on its own.

A sentence formed of a main clause and a subordinate clause is called a complex sentence.

Including a range of sentence types enhances text cohesion.

When writing, we should use a plan and success criteria.

Well done, everyone.

Of the amount that we needed to include in that writing today was really, really impressive and quite complex to get it all in there.

So well done you for rising to the challenge.

I'm looking forward to seeing you again very soon.