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Hello, my name is Miss Grant, I'm so glad you decided to learn with me today.

We're in the modern text first study unit, and our modern text is "Leave Taking".

Today we're gonna create a fantastic plan in response to an essay question about "Leave Taking".

And we're gonna think, well, why is planning so important? How can it help set us up for a fantastic bit of extended writing? I can't wait to hear all of your fantastic ideas.

I'm gonna be your support and guide as we work through today's lesson together.

Let's get started.

So by the end of today's lesson, you are going to plan an essay response, showing a clear understanding of the key terms which structure a successful plan.

Now we're gonna be focusing on "Leave Taking", of course, but all of the ideas that we explore today will be useful in any analytical essay that you write, so that's why it's such an important and exciting lesson.

There are some key words which are going to help unlock our learning today, and help us achieve our objective.

And they are thesis, which is the overarching argument to an essay supported by the entire text.

And we're gonna look really, really carefully at what a successful thesis statement might be during today's lesson.

Topic sentence, the first sentence of a paragraph, it states the paragraph's main idea.

And again, we're gonna really drill down what makes a really good topic sentence, and how is it different to a thesis statement.

Concluding sentence, the final sentence of a paragraph, it comes to a conclusion about the paragraph's main idea, focusing on writer's intention.

And our second learning cycle today is gonna be devoted to concluding sentences, which can often be a bit tricky, sometimes we don't look at them in as much detail as we do with topic sentences.

But in today's lesson, we are going to look at concluding sentences very carefully.

Main quotations, which are quotations which support your topic sentence, and that require analysis.

And supporting quotations, which are quotations which support your topic sentence, but don't require analysis.

So these keywords today, they're gonna help us unlock our learning, and achieve our objective.

Our lesson outline for today.

We're gonna start off by thinking about thesis statements, and we're gonna write a really powerful thesis statement, and then we're going to look at concluding sentences of paragraphs.

Let's start off with writing a thesis statement.

So you're gonna plan an answer to this question in today's lesson.

How does Pinnock use Brod to explore ideas around belonging in "Leave Taking"? Now Aisha has annotated the question, that important crucial first step when looking at an essay question.

And she's annotated how, and just noted down that this means she needs to explore Pinnock's dramatic methods.

Brod, noting down that she needs to explore this character.

And belonging, noting down that she needs to explore this theme.

So a crucial step, a very quick step, but one that you shouldn't miss out, just so that you know that you're completely focused on the right character, right theme, and you know that you need to explore dramatic methods for your particular essay question.

Now here's Aisha's planning grid.

So she's annotated the question, now she's thinking, I want to create a successful plan, and here's her planning grid.

And each section of Aisha's planning grid has a purpose.

So the thesis, here she's going to think what her overarching argument is, supported by the whole text, she's gonna plan for three topic sentences, so three main body paragraphs, and those topic sentences are the first sentence of a paragraph, and it states the paragraph main idea.

She's gonna write her thesis statement and topic sentences in full sentences.

Then she's gonna think about the supporting details.

Now these are references to the text which support your topic sentence, and they can be written in note form, and they include main quotations and supporting quotations.

So unlike your thesis statement and topic sentence, which you will write in full, even in the planning stage, your supporting details can be written in note form.

Concluding sentences.

Now these are the final sentence of a paragraph, and they conclude a paragraph's main idea.

And we're gonna look really carefully what makes a successful concluding sentence in learning cycle two.

And then, of course, your conclusion, which sums up your essay's overall thesis.

So this planning grade will ensure that Aisha has a really, really clear purposeful plan before she starts writing her analytical essay plan that she can rely on.

A check for understanding.

I'd like you to match each section of the planning grid to its purpose so that when you are faced with this planning grid, when you are thinking, I'm gonna plan an essay for "Leave Taking", or indeed any essay on any text that you want to write about, you know the purpose of each section of the planning grid.

So pause the video, and match each section of the planning grid to its purpose.

Pause the video now.

Well done for showing a fantastic understanding of each section of the planning grid.

So a thesis is your overarching argument supported by the whole text.

Topic sentence, the first sentence of a paragraph, it states the paragraph's main idea.

Supporting detail, references to the text which support your topic sentence.

Concluding sentence, the final sentence of a paragraph, it concludes the paragraph's main idea.

And conclusion, which sums up your essay's overall thesis.

You now have a fantastic understanding of each section of the planning grid and its purpose.

So Aisha wants to start her plan by drafting a thesis statement, and comparing thesis statements to topic sentences can be a useful way to understand what a thesis statement is.

So a thesis statement is the overarching argument of the entire essay, whereas a topic sentence explains the purpose of an individual paragraph, not the entire essay, but the individual paragraph.

A thesis statement is supported by the entire text, so your reading of the entire text no matter what that text is, whereas a topic sentence can be supported by moments in the text, it does not need to be supported by the entire text.

A thesis statement is found in your introduction, whereas a topic sentence is found at the start of each main body paragraph.

Let's look at some examples.

So I'd like you to consider the thesis statements in contrast to the topic sentences, and discuss what are the differences.

We've got our thesis statement, Pinnock presents Brod as deeply aware of the importance of belonging and the effect of its opposite: the feeling of dislocation.

And Brod is presented as dependent on Enid and alcohol, and bitter about his experiences in Britain.

He feels little sense of belonging, a feeling Pinnock shows as destructive.

So these are our two thesis statements in the first column.

Our topic sentences.

Pinnock uses Scene Two to show it is Brod's experiences in Britain which contribute to his uncertainty about where he belongs.

And the character of Brod serves as a contrast to Enid: whilst both want Del and Viv to feel a sense of belonging, their approaches differ.

So two thesis statements and two topic sentences.

I'd like you to discuss what are the differences between the two? Pause a video and discuss the question now.

Fantastic discussion there, showing off a brilliant knowledge of the difference between a thesis statement and topic sentences.

So some ideas that you might have had.

Well, these two thesis statements, or this first thesis statement here about Pinnock presenting Brod as deeply aware of the importance of belonging and the effect of its opposite: the feeling of dislocation.

This is an idea supported by the whole text, it doesn't refer to a specific moment, but actually that's a reading of the character throughout the whole play.

Whereas the topic sentence, Pinnock uses Scene Two to show it's Brod's experiences in Britain which contribute to his uncertainty about where he belongs.

That is focused on a specific scene in the text, it's focusing on Scene Two.

So that's a topic sentence, not a thesis statement.

The second example.

The thesis statement about Brod being dependent on Enid and alcohol, and that destructive feeling, a little sense of belonging.

This is an idea supported by the whole text, so that is a reading of Brod across the whole text, whereas the topic sentence, the idea of the character Brod serving as a contrast to Enid, this is focused on a specific idea in the text, Brod is a contrast to Enid, and that paragraph would explore just that one specific idea.

So we can see the differences between thesis statements and topic sentences.

And hopefully that will mean that you understand the differences between the two, and how a thesis statement can set up your overarching argument, and a topic sentence provides focus for an individual paragraph.

So a check for understanding.

Thesis statements start every paragraph.

Is this true or false? Pause a video and select your response now.

Well done if you selected false.

Now I'd like you to justify your answer.

Is it A, a thesis statement starts your essay as an argument supported by the whole text? Or B, a thesis statement starts your essay and your first topic sentence, then create a new thesis? Pause a video and select your response now.

Well done if you selected A.

A thesis statement starts your essay, and it is an argument supported by the whole text.

So a really secure understanding of a thesis statement at this point in the lesson.

Now I'd like you to write your own thesis statement for this question.

How does Pinnock use Brod to explore ideas around belonging in "Leave Taking"? Aisha annotated the question really helpfully for us earlier, and we have a really secure understanding of what a thesis statement might be, and I've got those pointers on the board for you that it should be the overarching argument of the entire essay and supported by the entire text.

So pause the video, and I'd like you to write your thesis statement for this question.

How does Pinnock use Brod to explore ideas around belonging in "Leave Taking"? Pause the video and write your thesis statement now.

Really beautiful to see people writing with such energy, with such drive, and really thinking, what would my response be about the character of Brod? I can see people thinking hard, drafting and redrafting aspects of their thesis statement to make sure that it's a really, really powerful idea, supported by the whole text.

Now thinking of redrafting a thesis statement, we've got Aisha's thesis here.

She wrote for her first draught, "Pinnock presents Brod as a character.

His sense of belonging is destabilised in Scene Two when the government calls him an 'alien'." Now it does not meet the checklist, because it's not an overarching argument for the entire essay.

I'm not sure what her argument is yet about the character of Brod, she's told me that he's a character, and that his sense of belonging is destabilised, but actually she does not have an overarching argument for the entire essay.

And it's not supported by the entire text because Aisha's focused on Scene Two, and including a short quotation from there.

So it does not yet meet the checklist.

But because she knows it doesn't meet the checklist, she's decided to do a redraft, and here is her redraft.

"Pinnock presents Brod's sense of belonging in contrast to each of the other characters in 'Leave Taking'.

His clear understanding of its importance allows Pinnock to be critical of factors which undermine this feeling." A fantastic redraft.

So now we've got an overarching argument of the entire essay because I know that this student, Aisha, is going to explore Brod's sense of belonging in contrast to each of the other characters.

And also the idea that Pinnock is critical of factors which undermine this feeling.

And absolutely it's supported by the entire text.

So Aisha is no longer just looking at Scene Two, but thinking about all eight scenes of "Leave Taking".

She might drill down into particular scenes for her topic sentences, for her main body paragraph, but this thesis is supported by the entire text.

So I'd like you to be like Aisha, and self-assess your own thesis using the checklist.

And just like Aisha was, be critical of yourself, and that doesn't mean that you need to give yourself a hard time if your initial thesis doesn't meet the checklist.

The whole point about writing is to evaluate what you've done, and improve and refine, that is part of the writing process.

So pause the video, and be like Aisha, and self-assess your own thesis using the checklist now.

Fantastic to see people evaluating their own thesis, and you now have a really strong overarching argument in response to the question, how does Pinnock use Brod to explore ideas about belonging? Now we are going to move on, and think about concluding sentences to main body paragraphs.

So we know we've got a really powerful thesis statement for our essay on the character of Brod.

We're gonna think about these main body paragraphs with a particular focus on concluding sentences.

So I'd like you to read this section of Aisha's plan.

She's got her thesis, and now she's moved on to planning out her topic sentences, her supporting detail, and concluding sentences.

So her topic sentences, "Like many characters in 'Leave Taking', it is Brod's experiences in Britain which contribute to his uncertainty about where he belongs." And the supporting details she selected is Enid, "This is my home", and Brod, "A few years ago, I woulda say the same thing", from Scene Two.

This quotation, "Call me a alien.

As if me live the last 30 years on the moon", also from Scene Two.

The story of Gullyman from Scene Two, and Enid's husband, Scene Seven, he understands the extent of racism in Britain.

And the fourth piece of supporting details, doesn't have anywhere to go when Enid throws him out in Scene Seven.

And then Aisha's concluding sentences.

"Ultimately, Pinnock uses Brod to voice explicit political criticisms of Britain's attitude towards migrant citizens from its Commonwealth." So you can see Aisha's written her topic sentence and concluding sentence in full, and her supporting detail in note form, which is a really, really nice way to create a plan.

Now I'd like you to discuss, just focus on the concluding sentence.

What is the purpose of this concluding sentence? Pause the video and discuss the question now.

Some really lovely discussions about this concluding sentence.

Really picking it apart, it's just one sentence, but it's such an important part of Aisha's plan, and really sets her up for success when she's going to be writing the analytical essay.

So here are some ideas that you might have had.

So Aisha's concluding sentence was, "Ultimately, Pinnock uses Brod to voice explicit political criticisms of Britain's attitude towards migrant citizens from its Commonwealth." And we've got, well, this adverb here, ultimately, it makes it clear that the paragraph has reached a conclusion, ultimately, so the final thing I'd like to say.

We've got a focus on writer's intention with Asia using the name Pinnock.

"Pinnock uses Brod to", so a real focus on writer's intention.

And then it links to, but it doesn't repeat, her topic sentence, so she's looking at the "explicit political criticisms of Britain's attitude towards migrant citizens from its Commonwealth." So it's one sentence, but it is very, very powerful.

We know the paragraph has reached a conclusion, there's a focus on writer's intentions, and it's linking to the topic sentence, but not repeating it.

So it's a really beautiful ending to a paragraph.

Now let's look at another section of Aisha's plan.

So this is a new topic sentence, her second of three topic sentences that she's planned.

And she has, "The character of Brod serves as a contrast to Enid: whilst both want Del and Viv to feel a sense of belonging, their approaches differ." So really strong topic sentence.

And then she's got a selection of supporting detail.

So Brod saying, "You teaching these children all wrong" in Scene Two, Brod imitating talking tongues, and Enid telling him to be quiet.

And Del saying, "He wants me to know who I am" to Enid in Scene Eight, after Brod has told her about her father's treatment of her mother.

So really nice topic sentence, some fantastic supporting detail, and then we've got this concluding sentence here.

"This proves Brod is a contrast to Enid." And this concluding sentence is less successful than the one she wrote earlier.

"This proves Brod is a contrast to Enid" is less strong than the concluding sentence we looked at earlier.

Ultimately, Pinnock uses Brod to explore criticisms, or voice explicit criticisms. This concluding sentence that Aisha has written is less successful.

And I'd like you to discuss what feedback would you give her so that she could improve this concluding sentence? Pause the video, and discuss what feedback would you give her? Pause the video now.

Some lovely discussions there, showing off your fantastic understanding of what a powerful concluding sentence should do.

So I'm really looking forward to seeing yours, which we will write later in this learning cycle.

So what feedback would we give her? Well, first of all, you should make clear that the paragraph has reached its conclusion.

And this proves Brod is a contrast to Enid does not make it clear that the paragraph is about to end, unlike the earlier concluding sentence which said, ultimately, which really signalled, look, this paragraph is coming to an end.

The other feedback was also to focus on writer's intention.

So earlier Aisha had used Pinnock uses Brod too to show that she understands that Brod has been crafted by Pinnock for a specific purpose, but she doesn't have that here.

And finally, link, but don't repeat, the topic sentence.

So we know that Brod is a contrast to Enid, that is what Aisha said in her topic sentence, and this just seems a slightly redundant repetition of that topic sentence.

So really good, clear, specific bits of feedback that Aisha can work on.

And indeed she does work on it, and she redrafts her concluding sentence.

And she writes, "In this way, Pinnock deepens our understanding of Viv and Del's sense of dislocation." "His function", Brod's function, "is to challenge Enid, and reveal her past so that her daughters have a more secure understanding of their identity." So a really successful redraft.

And it's a skillful concluding sentence, so not just a great redraft, but a great concluding sentence, because "in this way" makes it clear that the paragraph has reached its conclusion.

We've gotta focus on writer's intention.

So Aisha now used the name Pinnock, and talked about the character's function.

And finally it links, but it doesn't repeat, the topic sentence.

So we know Aisha wants to talk about Brod as a contrast to Enid, but here we've got the idea of challenging Enid, and his function is to "reveal her past so her daughters can have a more secure understanding of their identity." So really, really successful redraft here, reaching those three success criteria for a great concluding sentence.

So I'd like to do a check for understanding.

You've given me some fantastic ideas about what it means to have a powerful concluding sentence.

And can we see if we can identify of the three options here, which would serve as the strongest concluding sentence? So a pupil has written a paragraph exploring Brod and ideas of belonging.

Which would serve as a strongest concluding sentence? Is it A, as I said in my topic sentence, Brod explores not just ideas of belonging, but also ideas of isolation.

B, perhaps through the character of Brod, Pinnock is examining how your sense of belonging can be impacted by other people, rather than place.

And C, this brings me onto my next point about the character of Brod, and what Pinnock's intentions with this character are.

Pause the video, and select which you think is the strongest concluding sentence.

Pause the video now.

Well done if you selected B.

Perhaps, so signalling the end of the character, through the character of Brod, Pinnock is, so looking at writer's intentions, examining how your sense of belonging could be impacted by other people, rather than place.

A and C, rather than talking about a topic sentence, or Pinnock's intentions, these are things that you should, well, a topic sentence is something you should write, but you don't need to include the phrase at any point in your essay.

And then again, thinking about Pinnock's intentions, and saying, this brings me onto my next point, is a less skillful way of moving on to a new paragraph, or finishing a concluding sentence by drawing attention to the fact that you are moving on to your next point.

That is less skillful than simply moving on to your next point.

So perhaps through the character of Brod, Pinnock is examining how your sense of belonging can be impacted by other people, rather than place, is the most skillful concluding sentence.

Now I'd like you to plan your response to the question, how does Pinnock use Brod to explore ideas around belonging in "Leave Taking"? You have already written your thesis, which in some ways is the hardest thing, 'cause that's your overarching argument upon which everything else in your essay will hang.

You will focus on creating three topic sentences, and we've had some examples from Aisha to kind of guide us about what that might look like.

Supporting details, again, we looked at two sections of Aisha's plan, so we know that supporting details looks like references to the text.

And then of course, we've had some real focus on concluding sentences.

So I'm excited to see the power of those concluding sentences in your plan.

So pause the video, and using that planning grid, using your thesis, I'd like you to plan your response to the question, how does Pinnock use Brod to explore ideas around belonging in "Leave Taking"? Pause the video now.

Beautiful to see people planning so carefully, and it was great to see that the first step most people went to was getting their play script in front of them, and looking at their annotations, the ideas that they've had over the course of reading the play.

And those are things that you can rely on when you are planning any essay on "Leave Taking".

It was also really, really nice to see people making sure that their topic sentences link to their thesis so that the essay is really coherent, whole, and of course, looking at those concluding sentences.

Now, before we celebrate those plans, I'd like you to self-assess using these questions.

So do your topic sentences state your main idea for each paragraph? Remember we looked at the idea of topic sentences in learning cycle one.

So you've got a really secure idea of what makes a powerful focused topic sentence.

Does your supporting detail contain both main quotations and supporting quotations? So main quotations that you will analyse, and supporting quotations that you will just embed into sentences.

And do your concluding sentences make clear the paragraph has reached its conclusion? Focus on writer's intentions, so probably using Pinnock's name.

And link, but not repeating, your topic sentence.

So it's a really important part of the planning process so that you've got a secure, powerful, great plan that you can rely on.

Use these three questions now to self-assess your plan.

Pause the video, and complete that self-assessment now.

Well done for refining your ideas for your plan.

The reason why that's so important is now you have this fantastic plan, you've really developed your thinking about the character of Brod that might have led you in some interesting directions, some interesting thoughts that maybe you didn't have when you initially read the play.

And that plan can be used as a revision tool that you can return to.

Or indeed you can write up the essay, and just test those ideas.

Do they hold up? Was your plan as watertight as you thought it was? So you might return to that at a later point to write up this full essay.

So always trying to push, refine, and develop those ideas about a particular character, and creating essay plans, or writing the essay itself, is a fantastic way to do that.

In summary, you should annotate an essay question so you know its focus.

A successful plan follows a clear structure.

A thesis is a clear overarching argument supported by the whole text.

Topic sentences state a paragraph's main idea.

Concluding sentences focus on the writer's intentions, and link to your topic sentence without repeating it.

It's been such a pleasure to look at what makes a fantastic plan with you today, to explore the character of Brod, and have a particular focus on concluding sentences.

I look forward to seeing you next time.