Lesson video

Hello, everyone.

It's lovely to see you here today.

My name's Dr.

Clayton.

I'm here to guide you through your learning journey today.

So grab your pen, laptop, whatever you're using for this lesson, and let's get started.

So today's lesson is called Planning In More Detail.

What we're gonna do is talk through a step-by-step guide to creating a plan for writing description of an image.

We're gonna go through each step together.

I'm gonna specifically focus on creating mood and using linguistic devices.

So we have five words we're gonna focus on as our keywords.

Our first keyword is plan.

Now, understanding the concept of a plan is essential to today's lesson because we're gonna be creating a step-by-step plan together.

Now, the definition of a plan is a set of actions that have been thought of as a way to do or achieve something.

Our second keyword is atmosphere.

Now, this is an integral thing to consider when you're creating descriptive writing because the atmosphere of text is a feeling or sense evoked by an environment or setting.

Our third keyword is descriptive.

Now, descriptive means describing something in an interesting and detailed way.

So when you're creating a piece of descriptive writing, you want to make sure you're focusing on the detail of the image and really making sure the reader can visualise what you're describing.

Our fourth keyword is evoke.

Now, evoke means to bring a memory, feeling or image into the mind.

You want your descriptive writing to be evocative because you want the reader to not only be able to visualise the scene, but you want to have an emotional reaction to it as well.

Our final keyword is mood.

Now, mood and literature is the general feeling or atmosphere that a piece of writing creates within the reader.

When you're writing a descriptive piece, you want to make sure that every word, phrase, linguistic device you create contributes the mood of your piece.

You want it all to be cohesive so the reader can understand the emotion you're trying to create.

Now, I'll just give you a moment to write down those keywords and their definitions.

So pause the video and write them down now.

Fantastic.

Let's get started with the lesson.

So two learning cycles in our lesson today.

For our first learning cycle, we're going to be thinking about how to create mood.

Now mood is one of our keywords.

It means the general feeling the reader gets from the text.

So in order to think about how to create a cohesive mood, we're going to consider the steps involved in responding to an image, and then we're going to think about how you respond to the image.

Remember you'll all respond differently because we're all different and individual.

Once we thought about how you respond to the image, we're going to think about what emotional reaction you want the reader to have.

And then we're gonna think about how our vocabulary choices influence that reaction.

For our second learning cycle, we're going to consider how you can use linguistic devices in order to influence the mood of a text.

Now, there are many different types of linguistic devices, but we're gonna focus specifically on similes and metaphors.

We're gonna define similes and metaphors, think about why they might be useful in descriptive writing, talk through a step-by-step process to create them, and then you are gonna have a go at creating them to add to your descriptive writing plan.

In this lesson, we're going to make a plan for a piece of descriptive writing.

Now plan is one of our keywords.

It means to consider how to achieve something.

So we are going to be considering how to achieve a detailed and interesting piece of descriptive writing.

To do that, we're going to consider how to approach an image and create a plan for three paragraphs about that image by filling in this table together throughout the lesson.

As you can see, the table includes a column for the focus of the paragraphs, the details of that paragraph, the mood for each paragraph and linguistic device for each paragraph.

And as I said, we're gonna fill it in together as we go through the lesson.

So what I'd like you to do is pause the video and copy the table into your books.

Fantastic.

Let's move on with the lesson.

Now before we delve into making our own plans, let's just take a few minutes to consider the concept of a plan and why it's important.

So I'd like you to first discuss, why do you think making a plan is an important step in the writing process? So pause the video, take a few moments to consider.

Amazing, some great ideas there.

Now, like Lucas, you might have thought that making a plan allows you to collect your thoughts and select the best ideas.

It's normal to have a lot of different ideas when you first approach image, but making a plan allows us to really consider which of those ideas are the most effective and which will really help the reader to visualise the image.

Or like Sofia, you might have thought, that making a plan also helps you to make sure you're meeting all the success criteria.

It allows you to make sure you have a focus to your writing.

You're giving yourself the best chance possible to write an effective piece of descriptive writing.

So today we're gonna plan a piece of descriptive writing based on an image from Lewis Carroll's "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland." Now, this is one of my absolute favourite books because I love the whimsical, fantastical nature of it.

For those of you who aren't familiar with the story, Alice sees a white rabbit wearing a waistcoat and looking at pocket watch, and she decides to follow him down the rabbit hole into the world of Wonderland where the rules of physics and logic don't apply.

And Alice meets many memorable characters such the Cheshire Cat and the Mad Hatter.

Now this image is taken from a moment in the text where Alice has arrived at the court of the King and Queen of Hearts.

She's invited play croquet, where the mallet is a flamingo, the hoops are cards and the ball is a hedgehog.

And hopefully that gives you a hint of the whimsical nature of "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland." Now when approaching an image, you want to consider what the focal points there are in the image, what catches your eye? Then you can zoom in, describe them in more detail.

Remember, everyone will have different things that draw their eye.

We're all individual, we all respond to stimuli differently based on our previous experiences and our memories.

So in order to record your reaction to the image, I'd like you to create a mind map to show what you can see.

So pause the video and create your mind map now.

Amazing work everyone.

You might have said that perhaps you noticed the card tower in the background.

In the story, the cards are alive.

They can form structures at a moment's notice.

You also might have noticed the King and Queen of Hearts arguing in the background.

Now, if you're familiar with the story, you may know the Queen of Hearts is famous being angry and argumentative.

Her famous catchphrase is "Off with their heads," and she tries to behead anyone who disagrees with her, or who she doesn't like.

You might also notice the heart flowers in the front of the image.

Alice is that the King and Queen of Hearts' court.

So everything is red, and the images of hearts are everywhere.

You also might notice the image of a hedgehog running away in the front of the image.

Now I think that's what draws my eye the most because actually I feel quite sorry for the hedgehog, who's being forced to be a ball in the game.

Finally, you might notice Alice standing in the centre of the image with a Duchess looking over her shoulder and leaning over her.

You also might notice she's holding a flamingo because that's her mallet in the game.

So what I'd like you to do now is choose three details in the image that you'd like to focus on and add them into your plan.

These details will form the basis of your three paragraphs.

So think about which elements of the image you're most drawn to, but also which elements you think you could zoom in on and describe in detail.

So pause the video and add in your three elements now.

Amazing, now you might have said potentially, Alice and the Duchess could be your first focal point.

The card tower could be your second focal point and the hedgehog might be your third focal point.

Now we're gonna zoom in on those focal points and consider what details we notice or what words come to mind.

Now, we're going to consider the hedgehog as our example, because as I said, that's the detail I'm most drawn to in the image.

So what I'd like you to do to practise is to look back at the hedgehog in the image.

What details might we note down? So pause the video, take a few moments to consider.

Amazing, some great ideas there.

You might have said that it looks like it's running away.

You might notice the expression on the hedgehog's face and the way it almost appears that the hedgehog's in motion because of the way its legs have been drawn.

Also, you might have noticed the fact it's wearing a grey jumper, potentially to make it look more like a ball.

You also might notice that the spines are showing through the jumper, and potentially you might imagine that the hedgehog might feel quite uncomfortable because it's wearing the jumper but doesn't fit properly.

So now I'd like you to complete the second column by adding in details for your focal points.

So pause the video and complete the second column now.

Amazing everyone.

Now you might have said that potentially, for Alice and the Duchess, you might have noticed a scared expression on Alice's face.

She looks uncomfortable that the Duchess is looming over her shoulder.

You might have noticed the size difference.

The Duchess looks far larger than Alice, potentially, again, adding to that scared expression that Alice has.

You might also noticed the hand position, the position of the Duchess' hand on Alice's shoulder.

Again, making it seem quite an uncomfortable pose, especially for Alice.

For the card tower, you might've noticed the amount of cards.

There are so many cards in the image.

You might've noticed the heart in the middle, because the King and Queen of Hearts' Court.

You might've noticed how organised they are, for the hedgehog, you might've noticed, it's wearing a jumper, it's running away and the spines are showing.

So now that we have our focal points, we need to think about the mood of each of our paragraphs.

Now, in descriptive writing, the mood is the emotional response the writer wants to evoke in the reader.

So we want to think about what images or feelings your writing's creating in the mind of the reader.

For example, when looking at the argument between the King and Queen of Hearts, the writer might want the reader to feel scared, and they've used language to show that to the reader.

So now what I'd like you to do is look back at the image and complete the third column to show what feelings you want to evoke for each paragraph.

So pause the video, take a few moments to consider.

Amazing everyone.

So for Alice and the Duchess, you might think you don't wanna create tense and uncomfortable mood, because we naturally feel uncomfortable, we see someone else in an uncomfortable situation.

For the card tower, you might think you want to create this idea of curiosity and amazement because we don't normally expect to see animated cards creating buildings.

Now for the hedgehog, potentially you might want to think about pity and surprise, surprise at seeing a hedgehog walking on two legs, but also pity because a hedgehog is clearly uncomfortable at what's happening.

Now we're gonna consider how you can influence the emotional reaction of the reader through the way you use language.

Vocabulary choices such as adjectives and the verbs can really influence the mood of a text.

Now an example sentence might be, "The blank eyes of the card people seemed impossibly intimidating." Now let's focus in on blank and intimidating.

Now they do blank, it means empty, and that suggests an uncomfortable mood.

Intimidating also adds uncomfortable mood.

So we expect people to have emotion behind their eyes.

Now we might change those two words and change the meaning and the emotion of the sentence.

So we might change blank to warm, we might change intimidating to welcoming.

Now having warm eyes suggest someone who's friendly and positive, and a welcoming attitude suggests someone who's kind, so completely change the emotion of our sentence by changing two words.

Now for a quick check for understanding.

What I'd like you to do is match the adjective with the appropriate mood.

So your adjectives are enchanting, intimidating, exquisite, and wilted.

Your options for the mood are either negative or positive.

So pause the video and create the matchups now.

The correct answers are that enchanting creates a positive mood, intimidating creates a negative mood, exquisite creates a positive mood, and wilted creates a negative mood.

So very well done if you've got those right.

Amazing work so far everyone, onto our first task for the lesson.

What I'd like to do is practise using vocabulary to create mood.

Now in the foreground of the image, there are red heart flowers, what I'd like to do is rewrite the highlighted words to change this description to a positive mood.

So at the moment the description reads, "The angry flush of scarlet caught my eye first.

Pressing forward, it almost felt as if they're trying to intimidate me.

I drew back, but I could feel the heat from their stares following me." So at the moment, there's a semantic field of anger and intimidation throughout the description.

What I'd like to do is, as I said, change the highlighted words to create a positive mood.

So pause the video and have a go now.

Amazing work everyone.

It was great to see people using thesauruses and dictionaries to really make sure they choosing the most effective words possible.

They might have said, "The delicate blush of cherry caught my eye first.

Swaying forward, it almost felt as if they were trying to entice me.

I lent forward, and I could feel the warmth from their smiles invigorating me." So instead of the semantic field of anger and intimidation we had at first, we now have a semantic field of delicacy, smiling, and this really gentle feeling that creates a positive mood.

Fantastic work so far everyone.

We're now moving on to the second learning cycle of the lesson where we're going to look at how you can use linguistic devices, specifically similarly, the metaphors, to create effective, descriptive writing.

Now, linguistic devices are essentially ways of using language.

They're techniques that writers use to communicate a mood, a feeling, or theme more effectively.

There are many different types of linguistic devices, such a pathetic fallacy, personification, but we are gonna focus on using similes and metaphors.

Now what I'd like you to do is think about what you already know about similes and metaphors.

So pause the video and take a few moments to consider.

Amazing everyone, like Sam, you might have said that you know both create comparisons, but simile says something is like something else, whereas a metaphor, you're saying something is something else.

Now, before we look at how to create a simile and a metaphor, what I'd like to think about is why might using comparative devices such as similes and metaphors be effective in descriptive writing? So pause the video, take a few moments to consider.

Amazing discussions there.

I really liked how people drew on examples of similes and metaphors that they've heard or read and how people thought about how they helped them to visualise the scene.

And like Izzy, you might have thought that, "Making comparisons allows to paint a vivid picture to the reader to help them picture the scene since comparative devices take the abstract and they turn it into an image that the reader may be familiar with." For example, if you tried to describe someone with a loud voice, you might describe them as having a voice of thunder, because then, that creates the image in the reader's mind of a rumbling sound that stops you in your tracks.

So now let's talk through a step-by-step guide on how to first create a simile and then create a metaphor.

So how to create a simile.

Firstly, you want to decide on the mood.

This is an essential first step in creating any linguistic device, because you want to know what emotional reaction you want to provoke in the reader as that'll be essential in choosing your language.

So in this instance, we might decide the mood we want to create in the reader is scared.

Now second step is take an object from the scene and add an adjective to describe it.

So we might decide we're gonna focus on the hedgehog and its spine specifically, we might describe the spines as limp because that suggests something that lacks energy and vitality.

Now final step is to find something to compare it to that fits with the mood, and remember to use like or as 'cause this is a simile.

So there are two important parts of this step.

Firstly, when you're finding something to compare it to remember that creating a similar or metaphor, it's all about turning the abstract into something familiar.

So try to think of something the reader will be familiar with.

Secondly, remember to find a comparison that fits with the emotional reaction.

Now in this instance, we're trying to create scared emotion.

So we might think about how we can describe the hedgehog spines to show that scared reaction.

We might say something like, "The hedgehog's limp spines quivered like a flower buffeted by a strong breeze." Because quiver is a physical reaction we have when we're scared or uncomfortable, we then might have the comparison of a flower being blown about by the wind because not only does that mimic the shaking action of being scared, but also might imagine a flower would feel scared because there's no control over itself when the wind is blowing, much like the poor hedgehog, caught up in a game, has no control over.

So our final sentence would be, "The hedgehog's limp spines quivered like a flower being buffeted in a strong breeze." Now metaphor follows much the same step-by-step process.

So this time let's practise with an angry mood instead of a scared mood.

Now we know the King and Queen of Hearts are having an argument in the background of the image.

So this time we might take the Queen's fingers as our object from the scene.

We might choose describe as clawed because that fits with the angry, almost animalistic mood we're trying to create.

Then we wanna find something that compares it to that fits with the mood.

Now remember this is a metaphor.

So you're saying something is something else.

So in this instance, we might say, "The Queen's clawed fingers were knives jabbing at their target," because the idea of the Queen's fingers being knives just as she's intending to cause harm, and that fits with the angry mood we're trying to create.

So our final sentence is, "The Queen's clawed fingers were knives jabbing at their target." Now for a quick check for understanding.

So what I'd like you to do is tell me whether the following statement is true or false.

So true or false? The linguistic devices such as similes and metaphors are effective in descriptive writing? So pause the video and make a selection now.

The correct answer is true.

They are effective in descriptive writing.

Now I'd like to justify that answer.

So are they effective because A, they can take the abstract and turn it into a more familiar image for the reader to picture, or B, they can add to the abstract nature of description to make the reader work harder to understand? So pause the video and make your selection now.

The correct answer is A, they can take the abstract and turn it into a more familiar image for the reader to picture.

So very well done if you got that right.

Now let's have a look at how similarly the metaphors can be used effectively in descriptive writing.

We're going to look an example from Lewis Carroll's "Through the Looking-Glass and what Alice Found There." In this story, with the same main character as Alice from "Alice's Adventures in Wonderland," but instead of going down a rabbit hole, in this story, Alice goes through a mirror and explores the mirror world, whereas in Wonderland, the laws of physics and logic aren't the same as our world.

In this extract, Alice is going through the mirror.

"Let's pretend there's a way of getting through it, somehow, Kitty.

Let's pretend the glass has got all soft like gauze, so that we can get through." So what I'd like you to think about is how does the simile "soft like gauze" add to Carroll's description of the looking glass? So pause the video, take a few moments to consider.

Amazing work everyone.

You might have said that, "By describing the looking-glass as "soft like gauze," Carroll adds texture to his description of the looking-glass so the reader can imagine what it would feel like to reach out and touch the looking-glass just as Alice is doing." Now, let's consider an example of a metaphor in Carroll's work.

"'Get to your places,' shouted the Queen in a voice of thunder, and people began running about in all directions, tumbling up against each other." So what I'd like you to do is discuss how the metaphor, "voice of thunder" adds to Carroll's description of the Queen.

So pause the video, take a few moments to consider.

Amazing everyone.

You might have said that, "By describing the Queen's voice as 'thunder,' Carroll helps the reader to not only understand the emotion that the Queen is feeling, but also helps the reader to hear the Queen's voice in their head as it's just a loud, rumbling sound of thunder." Now for a quick check for understanding, what I'd like you to do is tell me whether the following statement is true or false.

So is it true or false that Carroll arguably uses simile to add sensory textural element to his writing? Pause the video and make a selection now.

The correct answer is true.

Now I'd like you to justify that answer.

So did he A, describe the mirror as being "soft like cotton wool," or B, describe the mirror as being "soft like gauze?" Pause the video and make a selection now.

The correct answer is B.

He described the mirror as "soft like gauze." So very well done if you got that right.

Amazing work everyone.

We're now with the final task of the lesson.

What we're gonna do now is complete our planning grid by adding in a linguistic device for each of our paragraphs.

Now remember to make sure your linguistic device matches the mood of your paragraph.

Remember to think about creating comparison that will help the reader visualise and understand the scene.

So pause the video and create your devices now.

Amazing work everyone.

Here's what you might've said.

So our first paragraph, the focus was Alice and the Duchess.

Want to create that tense and uncomfortable feeling.

So you might have said, "Her damp breath was a steam engine running up and down my neck." Now if you've ever seen a steam engine, you'll know they throw out clouds of smoke.

This to do the damp smoke engulfing us, would make us feel uncomfortable, and then we might understand just how Alice is feeling in that particular moment.

For the card tower, we want great curiosity.

So you might have said, "The sight created an irresistible tingling in my outstretched fingertips as if a butterfly was dancing on my skin." Now here, the tingling sensation mimics that excitement we feel when we're curious about something, want to explore it.

For the hedgehog, want to create surprise and confusion.

So you might have said, "My amazed mouth hit the floor like a drawbridge clanging open." Here, that if your mouth hanging open is a natural response to feeling surprised by something and that of a drawbridge clanging open also creates the idea of a sudden, loud noise, and that helps us create that surprise sensation because we're surprised when we hear a loud, sudden noise.

Amazing work today everyone.

Here's a summary of what we covered.

Creating a plan's important because it allows you to organise your thoughts and meet the success criteria.

The mood of a text is an emotional response the writer wants to evoke in the reader.

You can influence the mood through your vocabulary choices as well as the choice of linguistic devices.

Similarly and metaphors are effective in descriptive writing because they help the reader to picture the scene.

I really hope you enjoyed the lesson, everyone, goodbye.