Hello, my name is Ms. Grant.

I'm so glad that you've decided to learn with me today.

We're in the world at war: short stories unit.

Today we are going to do some creative writing.

We're gonna look at Katherine Mansfield's "The Fly." We're gonna focus on a minor character, the character of Macey.

We're gonna think, what do we learn about him? What can we infer about him? And if we were rewriting "The Fly" what would we say about this character to develop him.

I cannot wait to hear all of your fantastic ideas.

I'm gonna be your support and guide as we work through today's lesson together.

Let's get started.

So by the end of today's lesson, you are going to be able to rewrite two paragraphs of "The Fly" with a focus on the character of Macey, the boss's employee.

So we're gonna have a really close look at the character of Macey.

We're gonna see what Katherine Mansfield was doing with this character, why he's included, and then think, well, if I were going to rewrite "The Fly" from the perspective of Macey really inhabiting the internal life of Macey, what would I say? There are some keywords which are gonna be referenced throughout today's lesson.

We're really gonna get to grips with them.

They're gonna help us achieve our objective.

I'm gonna draw attention to one just now, which is omniscient.

That is how you pronounce this word, omniscient.

It's the third keyword and it means all-knowing.

So in "The Fly" we have an omniscient narrator.

It's in the third person.

So Mansfield uses pronouns like she, he, they, rather than I She's not a character in the story and she's all-knowing.

She knows about all the characters, all the events, all their lives.

So omniscient is the one I've drawn your attention to.

But if you want to spend some more time with our keywords, pause the video now, you can make a note of them and read through them, but as I say, they're going to be referenced throughout today's lesson.

Our lesson outline for today, in the first learning cycle, we are gonna generate some ideas about this character of Macey.

He's a minor character, but we are given some clues as to what he's like and his relationship with others in the text.

And then in the second learning cycle, you are going to be creative.

You're going to write with a focus on Macey.

So let's start off with generating ideas about this character, the character of Macey.

So Katherine Mansfield's "The Fly" is written using a third person, omniscient narrator.

So here we've got two of our key terms for today.

Third person, narrator, and omniscient.

Let's go into them in a bit more detail.

So third person, this means the narrator uses she, he and they, rather than I.

And the person telling the story is not a character in the story.

So Katherine Mansfield does not inhabit any of the characters in the story.

Omniscient, the narrator is all-knowing about the events and characters.

There's nothing that the narrator doesn't know.

And a third person narrator might focus more on one or more than one character's experiences.

And in "The Fly" this character is the boss.

So we've got Mr. Woodifield, we've got Macey, we've got some reference to some other characters.

But the character we really spend the most time with is the boss.

And we do get some of his internal thoughts and feelings, despite the fact that Katherine Mansfield is using third person.

I'd like you to discuss why might Mansfield have chosen third person for her story.

In your discussion, you could consider how the short story would be different if she wrote in first person.

So pause the video and discuss the question now.

Welcome back.

A lovely discussion there, getting to grips with one of our key terms, or more than one of our key terms 'cause we've got that word omniscient as well.

And when Katherine Mansfield sat down one of the first decisions she had to make about her short story was what narrative voice would she inhabit, would it be first person, would it be third person.

And a lot of people said, "well, I think the third person actually helps us to interpret some more of the ambiguities of these characters." So we've got the boss, this central character, he has this quite strange interaction with a fly.

And if we were inhabiting his head, if Mansfield had chosen first person, if she said "I" we would have access as to why he had this interaction with the fly.

And actually Mansfield wants us to be able to interpret what did these actions say about this character.

So I think that's one fantastic idea of why Mansfield might use third person.

But I also think that you are right that the reason we've got third person here is so that we can have a sort of outside perspective of all these different characters, all of whom have been affected in some way by World War I.

And we're sort of seeing them go about their day-to-day lives.

This story is set after World War I.

And we're getting quite a strange experience here where they're all moving to towards their futures.

But this huge, this huge war has impacted those futures dramatically.

And so that kind of outside perspective maybe gives some of this strangeness that some people felt after the war was over and their futures were looking radically different.

So sometimes a third person omniscient narrator can seem limiting because we're not given access to every thought and feeling of every character.

For example, in "The Fly" we hear very little of the following characters internal feelings, their inside experiences, what's going on in their heads.

So we don't hear about Mr. Woodifield's internal ideas, not that much, Mr. Woodifield's wife and daughters they're mentioned but of course we don't hear their internal thoughts.

And Macey, the boss's employee, we hear a little bit about him, but we don't hear many of his internal thoughts.

Now today we're gonna plan and rewrite a section of "The Fly" focusing on the character of Macey.

He is the boss's employee.

Like Mansfield, you are going to write as a third person, omniscient narrator, but you're gonna develop the character of Macey including his internal life.

So we will use third person, we'll use Macey, we'll use he rather than I, but you will be able to develop his internal life.

So here is what we learn about Macey.

He's the gray-haired office messenger.

He watches the boss when he stares into space after Mr. Woodifield has left.

Mansfield writes, Macey "dodged in and out of his cubbyhole like a dog that expects to be taken for a run." The boss orders Macey to keep everyone out of his office for 30 minutes.

Macey like the boss's son, liked the boss's son, sorry, old Macey couldn't make enough of the boy and the boss rings a bell for Macey, the old dog ordering him to get blotting paper.

So blotting paper was one of our key terms today, it's paper that soaks up excess ink from a pen.

And obviously the boss has put ink all over his blotting paper because he's used it to kill that fly.

So actually when you go back to the short story, you see that we are given quite a lot of information about Macey or certainly information from which we can infer or make some educated guesses about what he's like and his relationship with the boss.

So let's discuss, what kind of character do you think Macey is? How might he feel towards the boss? And I would like you to justify your ideas with reference to the text and they are all on the board for you.

You can reference those in your discussion.

Pause the video and discuss the question now.

Welcome back, well done for giving that discussion the time it deserves 'cause all of these ideas are gonna help you as we move through today's lesson.

And we start to think, "well what would I write about the character of Macey?" So lots of people started off with the idea that he's the gray-haired office messenger.

So he is an older gentleman just like Mr. Woodifield and the boss.

So they're probably roughly of the same generation.

And then people started to think, well what is his relationship with the boss like? Some people saying, "well, it seems a very close relationship.

Macey seems there for the boss.

He seems very observant.

He seems to understand maybe some of the emotions that he's going through" but others are saying, "well, I think Macey is ordered about by the boss.

And maybe that would irritate him." So dodged in and out of his cubbyhole like a dog that expects to be taken for a run.

Yes, maybe the idea of their relationship is there like a dog who expects to be taken for a run.

But maybe Macey resents this slightly.

He doesn't like the idea that he's inferior or felt to be inferior to the boss.

And the idea of a cubbyhole, that is a big contrast to the boss's office, which has been described in really elaborate detail.

So we've got some different pointers here and very, very different ideas from our inferences from these moments in the text.

And that's why I love Katherine Mansfield.

She does not give us absolutely everything, but she allows us to interpret events and characters as we like.

So now let's turn our attention to the idea of why is Macey in the story.

He's such a minor character.

Why did Mansfield choose to include him in the story? The story is only four pages long, so she did not have to include this character.

So why do you think she included the character of Macey? And consider how the story would be different if he weren't in it.

Pause the video and discuss the question now.

Welcome back.

Again, thank you so much for giving that discussion the time it deserves because this is going to help you as we work towards our objective for today's lesson where we rewrite from the perspective or inhabiting the character of Macey.

So lots of people said, well, the character of Macey is in there to help us understand the boss more clearly because we start to see that the boss is staring into space.

He's obviously been very affected by Mr. Woodifield mentioning his son's grave.

And through Macey we get to observe that and we also get to see that the boss orders everyone out of his office for 30 minutes.

And Macey is the one who is told, you've got to keep everyone out of my office after Mr. Woodifield leaves and Macey's also the subject of the boss's, not anger, but sort of irritation at the end when he asks for more blotting paper.

So through Macey we get to see these reactions of the bosses of the boss to the fly to Mr. Woodifield.

And in that way we might start to understand the character a little bit more, but we also start to see the love that the boss had for his son.

And it is Macey who helps us to do that.

By the boss, he has this kind of internal moment where he talks about his son, how much he misses him, the effect that it had on him when he realised he was dead and the boss says even old Macey liked him.

So we get maybe an idea of Macey being a little bit crotchety, maybe a little bit of a difficult character, but the boss's son won him over and the boss feeling very, very proud of that.

So seeing again that deepening relationship of the boss and his son.

So lots of different reasons why Macey might be included in this story.

Now here's what's some Oak people said about the character of Macey.

So we've got, Macey is devoted to the boss.

So that was one of our keywords, meaning love and loyalty.

A feeling of love and loyalty towards the boss.

That's what Laura thinks about Macey.

Macey understands the boss better than anyone.

Aisha's saying there's that understanding there between them And Jen says, we, like Macey, have to interpret how the boss is feeling at the end of the story.

So lots of ideas which also came up in your discussion.

Now I'd like you to discuss, can you develop or challenge any of these ideas? This is gonna push you to think about the character of Macey a little bit more.

Pause the video and discuss the question now.

Welcome back.

Some really nice development there and challenging of these ideas.

So let's start off with Laura's idea.

Macey is devoted to the boss.

So devotion, love and loyalty and lots of people seeing that love and loyalty through the description of Macey as a dog.

So it might seem a bit of a cruel description, but lots of people are saying, well relationship between humans and their dogs is often very close.

There's often a devotion there and care and love and Mansfield doesn't just call Macey a dog once, it's actually twice.

So really using those similes to convey the relationship between Macey and the boss and lots of people looking at Aisha's idea, this kind of split the room to be honest.

Macey understands the boss better than anyone.

Some people are saying yes, absolutely, Macey understands the boss.

That's why he's able to look at him after Mr. Woodifield has left, why he obeys his orders without question.

He knows the depth of love that the boss had for his son.

But others are saying Macey's just ordered about by the boss.

There isn't an understanding there.

There's a kind of slight fear or slight subservience where we've got a kind of master and his employee.

So it's not about understanding there, it's about a more transactional relationship.

And then John, we, like Macey, have to interpret how the boss is feeling at the end of the story.

Absolutely, Mansfield, we have to interpret how the boss is feeling through this interaction with the fly.

It's a slightly strange way in order to convey the depths of his human emotions.

And we are kind of left like Macey, thinking what has actually happened in this office and why is the boss acting in this way.

So some really nice ideas there.

And you have generated lots of ideas about character Macey, why he's in the story and what he might be like.

So Laura develops her ideas into a paragraph plan.

She's had a great discussion just like you have.

And now she thinks, right, I wanna start planning some of my paragraphs.

Here's her first one.

So her focus, it's overhearing and seeing the boss and Woodifield interact.

And then she notes down some details she wants to include that Macey hears the boss talking about the refurbishment with Woodifield, feels this is an example of the emptiness of the boss's life.

Catches a glimpse of the photo of the boss's son, recalls his attitude at work, e.

g.

him saying "simply splendid" remembers how the son won him over.

Looks at the boss with faithful eyes, a smile, prepared to support him unquestioningly, anger at Woodifield for bringing up the boss's son.

So a really nice paragraph plan there where we've got particular focus and then some supporting detail in order to help Laura when she comes to write her paragraph.

So I'd like you to discuss where has Laura focused on Macey's internal life and how has "The Fly" supported her planning? Pause the video and discuss these questions now.

Welcome back.

Well done for looking so carefully at Laura's paragraph plan.

Let's start off with where Laura has focused on Macey's internal feelings.

So the feelings going on inside his head.

So we've got at the beginning when he hears the boss talking about the refurbishment with Woodifield, that for Laura, Macey is going to think this is an example of the emptiness of the boss's life.

And then we've got some internal thoughts later on where he's prepared to support the boss unquestioningly and his anger at Mr. Woodifield for bringing up the boss's son.

And we can really see where "The Fly" has supported her planning.

So in terms of plot, because we know that Mr. Woodifield begins the story, he's in the boss's office, but we've also got some details from "The Fly" itself.

So this quote, "simply splendid." So you can use words or phrases from "The Fly" in your writing if you wish.

We've also got that reference to the photo of the sun.

So Laura's really looked at "The Fly" in detail and thought, "what do I want to include when I am rewriting this short story?" Now check for understanding before we move on to our own planning, just so you know what a really successful plan looks like.

So what is the most successful paragraph plan to rewrite a section of "The Fly" focusing on the character of Macey? We've got two examples here.

I'd like you to read through both and then select which one you think is the most successful plan.

Pause the video and complete this check now.

Welcome back, well done if you selected the second paragraph plan on the board, the one which says "Focus, Macey's despair." Let's have a quick chat about why this one is a more successful plan.

So it's really to begin with about the level of focus.

So the first one focuses, it says "Macey's feelings." This is quite vague.

We don't know what those feelings are, are they positive or negative? Whereas the second paragraph plan, focus, Macey's despair.

Despair is a very specific feeling, a feeling of hopelessness.

So we know what this paragraph is going to be about.

Then if we compare the detail.

In the first one, we have quotations from "The Fly." Now we're not looking for quotations from "The Fly" we're looking for you to flex your creativity to really develop the character of Macey.

So we don't need quotations, we need you to use them as a jumping off point to write your own, just as this student has in the second one where we look at Macey's despair, feels like he's given the best years of his life to the boss, catches his reflection, the photo of the boss's son, sees his grey hair.

That's a nice way where "The Fly" has clearly inspired, but it's not just a direct quotation from the text.

And then finally convey Macey's devotion.

Nice to use that keyword there.

Devotion, showing love and loyalty.

But how? How is the people going to do this? Whereas in the second one, despairs about the future, we know exactly why Macey is despairing it's because the future to him seems quite bleak.

So the second one, the one that says "focus, Macey's despair" is the more powerful paragraph plan.

So focusing on the character of Macey, I would like you to plan two paragraphs of a rewrite of "The Fly." The first thing you will do is decide a focus for each paragraph.

And the second is you'll create bullet points with the details that you will include and you may wish to rely on "The Fly" for inspiration.

You can see that we have looked at some models, Laura's model, and then the model from the check.

So you've got a good idea of what you are aiming for.

Give this activity the time that it deserves because you will rely on these plans in the second learning cycle where you will do some writing.

So pause the video and complete this task now.

Welcome back.

It is fantastic to look at these paragraph plans in front of me.

See lots of different ways that people have interpreted the character of Macey, really relying on the discussion that we had earlier in order to inform your planning.

I can see this creativity coming right through.

It's lovely.

So let's look at Laura's second paragraph plan.

She's gonna help us do some self-assessment.

So here's Laura's second paragraph plan.

She decided in her second paragraph, she would focus on receiving orders for the blotting paper.

The details she wants to include is Macey opens the door to the boss's office and sees his distraught, confused face.

Macey sees large splotches of ink in the penknife on the boss's table.

Macey and the boss look at each other in the eye.

Macey sees the pain and anguish, the boss changes, averts his eyes and orders more blotting paper.

And finally, Macey feels purposeful, eager to do anything the boss asked.

So really nice paragraph plan there from Laura.

Now I'd like you to discuss where has Laura focused on Macey's internal life and how has "The Fly" supported her planning? Pause the video and discuss these questions now.

Welcome back.

A lovely focus on Laura's plan there and we've got Macey's internal thoughts in terms of him feeling purposeful, eager to do anything the boss asks.

We can see that he's reacting to the boss's interaction with the fly with some confusion And where has "The Fly" supported her planning? Well, it's really helped with the plot, but we know the blotting paper, the asking for more blotting paper is an important part of "The Fly." And she's also got some really nice details.

So the large splotches of ink and the penknife on the boss's table.

Laura's obviously reread at the end of "The Fly" really carefully in order to include those details.

Now I'd like you to discuss how does your plan differ from Laura's? There will be very different ideas in there.

If you need to add some ideas, if Laura has inspired you a little bit, you can add those now.

But I'd like you to discuss how does your plan differ from Laura's? So what are you gonna talk about in terms of Macey in comparison to Laura? Pause the video and discuss the question now.

Welcome back.

It was lovely to hear those discussions there.

Some people focusing on Macey's resentment of the boss, feelings of anger towards him for all the servitude he's had to endure over the years, but others saying no.

Like Laura, I wanted to focus on their relationship and that kind of loyalty which comes through, but I decided to focus on something slightly different.

My Macey is going to pause outside the boss's office and not go and get the blotting paper and really contemplate what the boss is going through.

So lots of different ideas for these paragraph plans.

Okay, we're gonna move on to learning cycle two, where we're gonna rely on these paragraph plans to write or do a rewrite of "The Fly." So relying on her paragraph plan, Laura draughts a paragraph.

She has written at the top, first draught, third person narrative focused on Macey just a reminder what she needs to do.

And she's written, "ah yes, the boss was still talking to frail old Mr. Woodifield, showing off all the new trinkets and gadgets: the biggest, the brightest, the most modern.

Macey looked at his own desk, unchanged for the 40 years he had worked for the boss.

He was proud of his desk in his own way.

Proud of what it meant in terms of service.

I know every blemish, every ink stain, every dent in the wood, every wobble of the legs.

I heard the familiar clink of a bottle and glasses, the boss's whiskey." Now I'd like you to discuss how has Laura relied on "The Fly" and what does Laura need to do to return to, sorry, and edit? Pause the video and discuss these two questions now.

Welcome back.

A really careful exploration of Laura's paragraph there.

So we can see that she has relied on "The Fly" for the vocabulary.

So she's got that word frail, she's got this word proud in there.

And she's also got the plot because we've got Mr. Woodifield there and we've got the boss showing off all the modern things in his office and also that they drink whiskey together.

So it is good to rely on the plot just to kind of direct your paragraphs.

But what does Laura need to return to and edit? Well, she must remain in third person.

You can see at the end of her paragraph she's moved into I, it's very easy to do that when you're writing, especially when you're feeling inspired.

That's fine for a first draught, but to return to and edit that and make sure that you remain in the third person because that is our focus for today.

So I would like you to do a check before we move into our own writing.

I'd like you to rewrite the last section of Laura's paragraph, turning it from first person to third person.

And you can make further changes if you wish.

There might be something more that you want to change in terms of vocabulary, in terms of ideas.

So we've got Laura's sentences.

They're the ones where she's written in first person and we need her to write in third person.

So pause the video and rewrite the last section of Laura's paragraph, turning it from first person to third person.

Complete the task now.

Welcome back, well done for showing your fantastic knowledge of what it means to write in the third person.

Now here is Laura's redraft and she wrote, "Macey knew every blemish, every ink stain, every dent in the wood, every wobble of the legs.

He heard a clink.

Distracted, he turned around and saw the familiar glint and gleam of whiskey glasses." So you can see that she changed to third person, but she also made some other editorial decisions as well in order just to lift her writing.

So she's written in the third person.

And I would like you just to check your own sentences.

Do they meet the criteria? Are they also written in the third person? Pause the video and complete the check now.

Welcome back.

Well done for just checking your sentences are in the third person.

I saw people underlining Macey's name or the pronouns he, in order to show that they have met that criteria.

So I would like you now to write two paragraphs of "The Fly" You're gonna rely on your paragraph plans from learning cycle one and remember to write using a third person narrative voice.

You might want to rely on "The Fly" for inspiration.

And you can use Laura's sentence starter if you wish.

She began her paragraph.

"Ah yes, the boss was still talking to frail old Mr. Woodifield." It has been such a pleasure to hear all of your fantastic discussions and see your plans.

So give this activity the time it deserves.

Allow yourself to be creative, to try things out, and really consider the character of Macey as we have done throughout today's lesson.

So pause the video and complete this task now.

Welcome back.

Such a pleasure to see beautiful writing in front of me.

People have their paragraph plans next to 'em so that they could rely on them and just going through and doing a quick check at the end thinking, have I still got that third person narrative there and making any changes if they need to.

Before we celebrate your work, we're gonna do a little bit of feedback.

So we'd like you to consider Laura's paragraph from earlier.

"Ah, yes, the boss was still talking to frail old Mr. Woodifield, showing off all the new trinkets and gadgets: the biggest, the brightest, the most modern.

Macey looked at his own desk, unchanged for the 40 years he had worked with the boss.

He was proud of his desk in his own way.

Proud of what it meant in terms of service." So this has a third person narrative voice.

The boss, Mr. Woodifield, may, see, he, this shows that she, Laura is using third person.

We've got the internal thoughts of Macey.

He was proud of his desk in his own way, proud of what it meant in terms of service.

And we've got some inspiration from "The Fly" because Laura has relied on the boss showing off all of the modern items in his office to Mr. Woodifield.

She has used that to help form her paragraph.

So I'd like you to identify where you have met the checklist in your own writing.

Where's that third person narrative voice? Where are the internal thoughts of Macey and where has it been inspired by "The Fly?" Pause the video and complete this check now.

Welcome back, well done for giving that editing task that check, that self-assessment, the time that it deserves.

Lovely to see some people annotated the paragraphs to show, or some people put a checklist at the bottom.

But everyone making sure they've got that third person that they really developed the internal thoughts of Macey.

And yes, that inspiration from "The Fly" came forward.

In summary, Katherine Mansfield's "The Fly" is written using a third person omniscient narrator.

A third person narrator uses she, he and they, rather than I.

A third person narrator might focus more on one or more character's experiences.

Using third person means that the reader often has to interpret why a character does something, rather being told why.

We learn little about the character of Macey, but there are suggestions of his devotion to the boss.

It has been such a pleasure to see your creative writing today, and I look forward to seeing you next time.