Hello, and welcome to the lesson, Mrs. Butterworth here ready to take you through today's learning.

Now, today's lesson is called Planning an Analytical Response, but this isn't just any planning lesson.

This lesson is fantastic because it takes you through, step-by-step, everything you need to do to create an amazing, detailed plan that will help you to write an analytical response.

It's really good, I promise.

So should we get started? So in this lesson, you can effectively use a single paragraph outline to plan an analytical response.

So let's look at those key words that are gonna help with our understanding of the lesson.

These words are deplorable, bleak, judicious, relevant, and disparity.

Let's just look at the definitions.

So something is deplorable, it is something that is very bad or deserving of condemnation.

Now, bleak means something that is cold, bare, or without any hope or encouragement.

So if we're thinking about the women's football article, we could say that those conditions are very bleak and deplorable.

Now, when we're thinking about analysing and planning to analyse, we want to make sure that we are using judicious quotes.

And this means that we are picking well-selected quotes, but we're going to look at this in more detail as we move through the lesson, so keep your eye out for that word judicious.

And when we are using quotes, we also want them to be relevant, and this means closely connected to or appropriate.

So again, as we move through the lesson, you'll understand what that word relevant means in relation to quotations.

And then we have this word disparity, a noticeable and significant difference or inequality, which again, is a very key word when we're thinking about what is being presented in the article about women's football.

Okay, so the outline of our lesson looks like this.

So as I said, this is a step-by-step guide to planning a fantastic analytical response, so we're going to start by looking at topic sentences and how to create really fantastic topic sentences.

We're then going to look at choosing and embedding quotations, and then finally, looking at our concluding sentences.

So lots to get through today so let's get going.

So as I said, you were going to use a single paragraph outline, and that looks like this.

So we have our topic sentence, we have our supporting details, and we have our concluding sentences.

This is what it looks like.

So your topic sentence introduces the main ideas in your paragraph, then your supporting details are the information and ideas you gather from the text.

So these can be key quotes and your own comments.

And then finally, we have a concluding sentence.

Now, a concluding sentence obviously concludes your arguments or the main ideas in your paragraph, but we're going to begin with our topic sentences.

So in order to practise writing up an analysis, we need a question.

So this is our question.

"How does the writer use language to present the challenges and conditions faced by the women footballers?" Okay, so that's our question.

So I just want us to think about this question, and I'd like you to discuss what adjectives could you use to complete this sentence? So in relation to the task, what adjectives could you use to complete this sentence? "The writer presents the conditions as.

." Some of you may want to think about the key words at the start of the lesson, because some of those might be useful.

Giving you a little hint there.

But if you can pause the video and discuss any other ideas you have, that would be great.

Okay, ready to go? Pause the video.

Excellent.

Some fantastic adjectives coming up there.

Let's just share some of those ideas.

So the writer presents the conditions as deplorable.

Excellent, yes.

One of our key words there, deplorable.

Substandard, harsh, unequal, dismal, daunting, and bleak, another one of our key words.

So I did hear lots of other suggestions, but these are just some of the adjectives that we could use to complete that sentence.

So these adjectives, once we've thought about this, and this works, whenever you are looking at a question like this, these adjectives can be used to help structure topic sentences.

So the writer presents whatever the key word is from the question, and then you can use an adjective to complete that.

So when you're constructing your topic sentence, you should use a declarative sentence.

So think of this like making a statement about the text.

So let's look at an example.

"Bloomfield and Herbert present the conditions experienced by the women footballers as deplorable in order to convey the inequality present in the sport." So you can see I'm making this kind of statement about the text, but also linking to the question as well, linking to those key words.

So you can see that I've used that declarative sentence.

I've also used words from the question, presents the conditions experienced by the women, and then I also, you will notice, used adjectives from the initial discussion, so as deplorable.

So that's why thinking about that statement, how does the writer present, and then completing those adjectives gives you some ideas as to how to complete your topic sentence.

And then finally, in this topic sentence, I've also linked to the writer's purpose, so in order to convey the inequality present in the sport, so we know that that's what the writer wants to achieve.

So this is what makes a good topic sentence.

It is a declarative, you use words from the questions, you use adjectives from the initial discussion to start answering the question, and then you link to the writer's purpose.

Okay, so we have two of our pupils here, and I want you to select A or B, which student has created the most effective topic sentence? So let's read through the sentences together.

So, "Bloomfield and Herbert reference experts to add credibility to the article." And, "Bloomfield and Herbert present the conditions as dismal, revealing the inequality still present in football." So which is the most effective topic sentence, do you think A or B? Fantastic.

Most of you noticed that it was B.

And we can see here it's because it does everything it needs to on the checklist.

It's a declarative, it's got words from the question, presents the conditions, it's used an adjective to start answering the question, dismal, and it links to the writer's purpose, revealing the inequality still present in football.

So can you explain why Jun's sentence is the most effective? Absolutely you can, because we've just done it using the success criteria.

So we are onto our first task, and it's up to you now to write your own topic sentence.

So you'll need to write your own topic sentence for the following question.

"How does a writer use language to present the challenges and conditions faced by the women footballers?" So remember, exactly like we've just seen, it needs to be a declarative sentence, you need to use words from the question, use those adjectives from your initial discussion, and it needs to link to the writer's purpose.

Okay, is everybody ready to go? I know you've got this.

We've done lots of practise, so all we've got to do now is pause the video and get that topic sentence written.

Off you go.

Great stuff, everyone.

I just want to do a bit of feedback before we move on.

So let's have a look at Sam's topic sentence here.

So Sam has written this topic sentence.

"The writer uses statistics to highlight the challenges faced by the women footballers." Now, Sam has been given this feedback.

Let's read that feedback together.

So what Sam has done well is they've used a declarative sentence of words from the question, but what they could do even better is if they linked to the writer's purpose.

And something that Sam has done here is lead, they've led with a language, they've led with a language feature, so the writer uses statistics, and actually, doing this really limits the analysis.

So it'd be even better if Sam didn't lead with a language feature.

They should also try to include an adjective to describe how the challenges are presented, because this will make it even more relevant and specific.

So this is a really good first attempt from Sam, but there's definitely work to be done when we're thinking about not leading with a language feature, using and including an adjective to describe how the challenges are presented, and that will just make it more relevant and specific.

So Sam has used the feedback to rewrite the topic sentence, and this is what they've come up with.

"Bloomfield and Herbert suggest that the challenges are daunting, which emphasises a greater need for equality in the sport." So that is a much better topic sentence.

So I'd like you now to do exactly the same with your own work.

So self-assess your own work and improve your topic sentence.

And then once you are happy, you can add it to the first part of your single paragraph outline, and that's the first part of planning done.

Okay, pause the video to really make sure that that topic sentence is perfect.

Off you go.

Okay, so moving through those steps, we are on the second part of our lesson.

So we've thought about our topic sentences, and now we're going to look at how we can choose and embed quotations.

So just as a reminder, we've got our single paragraph outline there, and we are now going to focus.

on finding our supporting details.

So it's that middle section of that single paragraph outline.

So this is where we gather all the information and key ideas from the text that we need to plan effectively for our analytical response.

So we know that quotes are used in responses to provide evidence and emphasise your ideas about a text.

So the best responses will choose quotes judiciously.

Okay, there's that key word there, judiciously.

So what this means is that quotes will be well-selected and relevant to your topic sentence.

So that's quite a key piece of information there, that they need to be relevant to your topic sentence.

So if you have said that the conditions in women's football are dismal, you need to make sure that your quotes are the best to show those dismal conditions.

They need to be chosen from the breadth of the text to offer a range.

So we don't wanna just see quotations taken from the first two lines of the text.

They need to be from throughout the text to demonstrate that you've read it, and then they need to be analytically rich, so what this means is that they have interesting features to comment on.

So you've really thought about the most interesting words and phrases to use as evidence.

You've got lots that you can say about them, they're analytically rich.

So when you're filling out your supporting detail, it should look like this.

Should be relevant to the topic sentence, only in note form, so we don't need any full sentences in that supporting detail section, notes are absolutely fine.

Remember, we're planning, so we want this to be efficient.

Any methods identified and any key words underlined.

So what does this look like? It looks like this.

So here's my example.

So you can see here I've got my key words there, rats and mice.

I've identified the method or word type, noun, and I've identified my key words of connotation and underlined it and creepy imagery and underlined it, and connotation of disgust creates creepy imagery.

So you can see that note there gives me enough information to know exactly what I'm going to write when it comes to writing my response.

I'm gonna talk about write rats and mice, gonna identify that they're noun.

I'm gonna explore the connotations of disgust and how it creates a creepy image.

And then the next one is I'm gonna talk about the comparison, so again, I've underlined that key word between the words rudimentary and elite.

There's a real difference there in those words.

So I'm gonna make sure I talk about that comparison between the conditions and how these adjectives really emphasise the disparity between those two.

So you can already see how just keeping these notes like this is a really efficient way to provide all the information that you need to create a really effective analytical paragraph.

So true or false time.

If a quote is chosen judiciously, it is relevant to your topic sentence.

Is that true or false? It's true.

Fantastic, I'm glad most of you got that.

Absolutely, those quotes have to be relevant to your topic sentence.

And then justify your answer by picking A or B, please.

And the answer is A, that's right.

It also means if your quotes are chosen judiciously, that they are chosen from the breadth of the text to offer a range.

Fantastic work so far, everyone.

Let's keep going.

Once you have selected your judicious quotes, you must consider how to use them in your response.

So we're going to explore a little bit now how that supporting detail can be transformed into an excellent use of quotations.

So we want to think about using embedded quotes or using an embedded quote.

An embedded quotes will be short and included within your sentence.

So for example, here's an example of a sentence using an embedded quote.

"In using the adjective 'rudimentary; to describe the facilities, the writer reveals the gender disparity in football." So you can see here how those examples, those quotes have just been weaved in, the sentence just flows.

It doesn't feel like they've just been bolted on at the end, they become part of the sentence, and this is a really good thing to do when you are including your quotations in your response, but what I really want to show you is how the supporting detail can support you in doing that.

So let's look here.

Here is my supporting detail.

You can just see that there, it's the example from earlier.

And I can use this to become a really good sentence that uses embedded quotations, so I'm going to show you now.

Look at this, "In using the adjectives 'rudimentary' and 'elite' to describe the conditions, the writers are able to emphasise the disparity between men and women's experiences of professional football.

' So you can see exactly here how I've used the words from my supporting detail to create this beautiful sentence with embedded quotations.

Okay, so let's see how we are doing with those embedded quotations.

So which of the following sentences uses an embedded quotation, is it A, B, or C? So very well done to everyone that noticed it was B, the writer describes the struggle faced by the women, so we can see how that quotation just flows in the sentence.

It's embedded there.

So if we look at answer A, elite and rudimentary, this is an example of a comparison.

You can see how this person has put the quotations on their own.

They're not part of the sentence.

Likewise with answer C, the writer uses a comparison.

or example, in the words elite and rudimentary.

So you can see how these have not quite been embedded.

They're kind of added on, they're introduced separately.

So we really want to try and use those embedded quotations to make our writing even more sophisticated.

Okay, so your second part, your second practise task.

So we are moving down into our single paragraph outline into that supporting detail section, and what I would like you to do is I would like you to complete the supporting detail in your single paragraph outline to answer this question.

So remember, our question is, "How does the writer use language to present the challenges and conditions faced by the women footballers?" Now remember to check your topic sentence from task A, because your supporting detail needs to be relevant to that.

Remember to keep it in note form, identify those methods, and underline those key words.

You've got this, okay? Pause the video and get that supporting detail done.

Off you go.

Okay, great.

We are getting through these plans, aren't we? So using the checklist, I want you to make sure you check the supporting detail in your single paragraph outline, so make sure that it's relevant to your topic sentence, that's very important.

Just make sure it's only in note form and that the method is identified and any key words underlined.

So exactly like we have just looked at.

So just take a moment to use that checklist to check your supporting detail.

You may need to pause the video to give yourself time to do this.

So now I want you to think about, now you've looked at that supporting detail, I just want you to discuss exactly like we did a moment ago, how will you embed the quotations you have chosen and have you selected your quotes judiciously? So I'd like you just to discuss those questions.

Maybe discuss how you would use your quotations in a sentence, for example.

So pause the video so you've got time to discuss your ideas or just think quietly to yourself.

Off you go.

Okay, so we are on the final part of our lesson and the final part of our plan.

Now, I know this might seem like a really long process, but remember, we are going through it step by step.

The more you practise it, the quicker you'll become.

And you will just see how quick and efficient planning can be to write really effective responses, but we just need to do that final step, our concluding sentences, and that last step in our single paragraph outline.

So let's just remind ourselves of what an effective concluding sentence will do.

It will summarise your key ideas.

It will link to your topic sentence.

Very important.

It will signal to your reader that your paragraph is drawing to a close.

And it will use conclusive discourse markers.

Now, discourse markers, so using conclusive discourse markers is a great way to write your concluding sentences.

So these look like this, therefore, ultimately, as a result, consequently, so you can hear, can't you, that they sound like they are concluding something.

So they're a really great way to write your sentences.

So let's look at an example.

So, "Therefore, Bloomfield and Herbert's aim to expose the gender inequality in football is successfully achieved." So it sounds like the paragraph is finishing, you're drawing a conclusion.

Let's look at this one.

"Consequently, readers are now fully aware of the disparity between women and men's football." So I've got two pupils here, and I'd like you please to pick which student has created the most effective concluding sentence.

Should we just read them through together first? Okay, so pupil A.

"As a result, Bloomfield and Herbert identify the ongoing gender inequality present in the challenges that the women face." And, "Bloomfield and Herbert use different word types to convey the dismal conditions the women face.

For example, the adjective 'rudimentary.

'" So which pupil has written the most effective conclusion sentence, A or B? Oh, lots of you with the right answer there.

Yeah, that's right.

It is A.

A is the most effective.

And do we know why it's the most effective? Well, I'm going to explain.

So it is because it has got that conclusive discourse marker, hasn't it? "As a result, Bloomfield and Herbert," and it sounds like it's concluding the paragraph.

It's bringing the argument to a close, the paragraph to a close.

If we look at pupil B, it's quite general.

So they, "Use different word types to convey the dismal conditions." That's fine, but this idea, "For example, the adjective 'rudimentary,'" it sounds like they're about to introduce another point.

It doesn't really feel like the end of a paragraph.

It kind of feels like the middle, doesn't it? So it's really important that you're concluding sentence uses that conclusive discourse marker and then brings your paragraph to a nice end, to a nice conclusion.

Okay, we have reached our final practise task, which means we have nearly completed our plan.

So what you need to do is write your own concluding sentence to complete your single paragraph outline.

Now remember, we're answering the question, how does the writer use language to present the challenges and conditions faced by the women footballers? Now remember, your concluding sentence should summarise your key ideas, so you'll need to look at your supporting detail and your topic sentence.

It should also link to your topic sentence.

It should signal to your reader that your paragraph is drawing to a close.

And then finally, use those conclusive discourse markers.

So we are nearly there, everyone, we just need to write a really effective concluding sentence.

Pause the video, and off you go.

Excellent.

Well done, everyone.

So you have reached the end of your plan, but we need to check those concluding sentences.

So let's look at Lucas' topic sentence and his concluding sentence.

So his topic sentence says, "Bloomfield and Herbert present the conditions as dismal, revealing the inequality still present in football." And his concluding sentence says, "Ultimately, the writers are calling the readers to action." Hmm.

Now what do we think about that concluding sentence? So I'd like you to discuss please, how could you help Lucas include his concluding sentence? Can you give him a what went well and an even better if? So pause the video so you've got time to discuss and think about that, what went well and even better if, off you go.

Okay, so let's see if what I've come up with is similar to what you said.

So what is really great about Lucas' concluding sentence is it uses a conclusive discourse marker to signal the end of the paragraph.

So ultimately, so that's a really good thing.

The problem with it though is it doesn't link to the topic sentence, does it? Now, the topic sentence is all about how the conditions are dismal and how the writers are revealing inequality in football, but Lucas is talking about a call to action and how the readers are, yeah, and how the writers are calling the readers to action, which doesn't quite work with the topic sentence, does it? So what I would like you to do is do exactly the same with your work.

Just self-assess your own concluding sentence and give yourself a what went well and an even better if.

So pause the video so you've got time to do this, and make sure your concluding sentence is perfect.

Off you go.

Okay, fantastic.

We have reached the end of the lesson.

Now, as I said, I know this seems like a very long process at the moment, but the more you practise and the more you follow these steps, the quicker you'll become and you will become such efficient, amazing planners, your writing will also benefit as a result.

So do keep practising this planning, 'cause I promise, this strategy is a great way and it gets fun, it just helps your writing.

Okay, so let's just recap everything that we have looked at.

We now know that single paragraph outlines are a useful tool in the planning process, that topic sentences should include words from the question and link to the writer's purpose, quotations need to be judiciously chosen, quotations can be embedded into your response, and they should be, concluding sentences should link to your topic sentence and summarise your main ideas, and that using conclusive discourse markers is an effective way to end your paragraph.

Again, thank you so much for your hard work today.

I've really appreciated it and it has been such a great lesson that I cannot wait to see you all again soon in next lesson.

Okay, until then, goodbye.