Lesson video

Hi everyone.

Miss Briar here for lesson nine of our "Honey and Trouble," recycled character unit.

In lesson eight, we started off writing the start of our recycled story.

And today we're going to be carrying on with it.

I left you with some trivia.

I asked you how fast you thought a blackbuck antelope could run.

How fast did you think? Do you think you could win be to in the race? Do you think a dog could be to in the race? Do you think any of the animals that we've been making our animal friends could be too? Well, let me tell you that actually the blackbuck antelope is the fastest animal in our set of animal friends.

They can run up to 80 kilometres an hour.

That's 49 miles an hour.

Faster than a cat.

Faster than a dog.

Faster than a leopard or a rhino, or a deer, or a python or an anything that we've got as a character in our story.

So, unless you've chosen a cheater or some equally speedy land mammal, you are not going to have an animal friend faster than the blackbuck antelope.

We're going to start with a song today, before a flexing on the learning we did in lesson eight, then doing some shared writing of the next part of our story, before you independently write yours and edit your sentences.

In this lesson, you will need exercise book or paper, a pencil, and your brain.

So, pause the video now, if you need to get any of those things.

Do you remember the song we learned in unit seven? It was all about the monkey being foolish and all the actions he takes and the thoughts he has that make him foolish.

It goes, he thinks he knows, but he really doesn't know.

Do you remember the tune? ♪ He thinks he knows ♪ ♪ But he really doesn't know ♪ ♪ He thinks he knows ♪ ♪ But he really doesn't know ♪ ♪ He thinks he knows ♪ ♪ But he really doesn't know ♪ ♪ And that's what makes him foolish ♪ Do you remember? If you have a female main character in your story, a girl, then you could sing, She thinks she knows, but she really doesn't know, that's up to you.

If your character is still a boy, then you can sing he again.

First verse is he thinks he knows, but he really doesn't know.

The second verse is how he asked for trouble when he wanted honey.

He asked for trouble when he wanted honey.

Remember? ♪ He asked for trouble when he wanted honey ♪ ♪ He asked for trouble when he wanted honey ♪ ♪ He asked for trouble when he wanted honey ♪ ♪ And that's what makes him foolish ♪ And the third verse is he doesn't think about why he got hurt.

He doesn't think about why he got hurt.

Remember? And that last line, where we go, ♪ That's what makes him foolish ♪ The last one.

Remember it goes like this.

♪ He doesn't think about why he got hurt ♪ ♪ He doesn't think about why he got hurt ♪ ♪ He doesn't think about why he got hurt ♪ ♪ And that's what makes him foolish ♪ Can we sing it all the way through? See if you can remember.

He thinks he knows, but he really doesn't know.

He asked for trouble when he wanted honey.

He doesn't think about why he got hurt.

Are you ready? Off we go.

♪ He thinks he knows ♪ ♪ But he really doesn't know ♪ ♪ He thinks he knows ♪ ♪ But he really doesn't know ♪ ♪ He thinks he knows ♪ ♪ But he really doesn't know ♪ ♪ And that's what makes him foolish ♪ ♪ He asked for trouble when he wanted honey ♪ ♪ He asked for trouble when he wanted honey ♪ ♪ He asked for trouble when he wanted honey ♪ ♪ And that's what makes him foolish ♪ ♪ He doesn't think about why he got hurt ♪ ♪ He doesn't think about why he got hurt ♪ ♪ He doesn't think about why he got hurt ♪ ♪ And that's what makes him foolish ♪ Good job.

Well done everyone.

It's time for us to reflect on our learning.

That means, think about what we've already done.

You're going to need your description that you wrote in lesson eight for this so that you can check back over it and see where you've got up to.

That's going to help you with where to start from today in lesson nine.

As you check today, keep that character writing toolkit in your head.

We need to make sure that we care about your main character.

We do that through their physical appearance and dress.

Their actions that show their personality, their speech and their thoughts and feelings.

Those four things should be constantly in our writing.

And today when we introduce a new character into our writing, we want to try and get those things for them too.

I hope you've had a chance to reflect on and read through your writing from lesson eight.

Now, it's time for us to carry on with it and share some writing together.

So, in lesson eight, we started writing the first part of our "Honey and Trouble" recycled story.

We did this section of our boxing.

The part where the main character finds the honey and they are delighted.

And we have got our notes and we've hopefully managed to get all of those words in at least all of those ideas.

And now we're going to move on to meeting one of their friends.

So, we're going to meet the first friend that come to you.

For me, that sister python.

For you, it might be a different animal.

So, you will write about whichever one is on your story map and on your boxing.

When we were reading about sister python, we decided that her main inequality was her sleepiness, slowness and the laziness.

So, I think I want to try and get that into my writing today.

The fact that she's a little bit slow and sleepy and lazy.

So, I think the best way of me doing that is actually to have her having a little snooze.

So, I'm going to say sister python was snoozing on a rock.

Should we tap that? Sister python was snoozing on a rock.

On your shoulders.

Sister python was snoozing on a rock.

On your hips.

Sister Python was snoozing on a rock.

On your elbows.

Sister Python was snoozing on a rock.

And in your fingers.

Sister Python was snoozing on a rock.

How many words? Seven.

Let's starts off with sister.

SSSSS Sister.

Sssi.

Ter Sister Sister.

Python.

I can look at my boxing there for my spelling of python with a miss prior I.

that spelt with a Y.

Python.

Python Sister Python was, W-A-S, was, was snoozing.

Snoozing.

On A.

Rock.

Rock.

C-K, cause a one syllable word with the short O sound.

Was snoozing on a rock, full stop.

She was snoozing on a rock.

Now I don't really know anything about her physical appearance from that sentence.

So, I want to describe her.

Now, she has a very long body.

Doesn't she? So, I'm going to say her long body was.

Curled.

Snakes cloth and curl up on it.

Her long body was curled around her smooth head.

I'm going to write that.

Her long body was curled, sorry.

Around her smooth head.

Her.

Her.

Her.

Smooth.

Her smooth.

No, her long.

That means I need to pay attention.

Her long, her long.

Body Happy, happy.

Her long body was W-A-S, was again curled.

Curl past tense was curled around, around her the head that was smooth.

Though to be fair, her body is smooth too.

Her.

Smooth.

Head.

Then we need a full stop.

Around her smooth head.

So, we still want to show her personality.

She's having a snooze.

Maybe she could lift her head up really slowly.

Like she's really tired, like, mmmh.

Grounded to bed.

I'm guessing the stork is.

Stork is quite silly and loud, isn't he? So, maybe he's made a lot of noise.

Maybe she left.

She slowly raises her head.

When she heard the stork.

There we go.

That'll do.

She slowly raised it, when she heard the stork.

She slowly raised it, when she heard the stork.

She slowly raised it, when she heard the stork.

How many words I'm about to do? She slowly raised it, when she heard the stork.

Nine words.

She, S-H-E spells she.

Slowly.

Slowly.

Raised.

E-D for raised.

Raised it.

W-H-E-N, When, when.

She.

Heard.

Is like I do , isn't it? It doesn't sound like its going to be in it when she heard.

The.

Stork.

So, I've got some things about her actions now.

She's snoozing on the rock and she slowly raises her head that's some actions that we've got.

We've also got about her physical appearance.

We've got her long body, her smooth head, Time for some speech, I think.

The stork is coming, probably it means the stork is going to speak first.

So I'm going to have him calling out to her.

"Sister python!" said the stork.

There we go.

We can check our spellings again and make sure we write them the same.

"Sister Python!" With an exclamation mark to show the big feeling.

He's so excited.

"Sister Python!" Said.

The.

Stork.

Full stop.

Now, in the story he says, "I found my new favourite thing in the whole world.

"It's trouble.

"I really like trouble.

"And I wonder if its something that you could do "any that you could give me." He says lots and lots of words.

And that's a lot for me to write today.

So, I think I'm going to skip straight to the end.

"I was wondering if you had any trouble "that you could give me." We've got lots of these spellings already as well, so I can make python for this bit I.

Was.

Wondering.

If.

Y-O-U spells you.

You had.

Any.

Trouble.

That word is in my boxing, I can copy it.

You.

Could.

Give.

Of course that's already You could.

Give.

M and E spells me.

"I was wondering if you had any trouble "that you could give me?" He's kind of asking her, so, I'm going to do a question mark.

"I was wondering if you have any trouble "that you could give me?" So, now we can ask this in python's voice.

So, I'm thinking she's got a hissing voice.

Isn't she? So, I'm going to say, are you sure ? With that hissing voice and add in lots of sounds to make that nice and clear that she's hissing.

A-R-E spells are.

Are you? A lot of SSSSS from my snake.

Sure? It's a question.

Now, let's have said.

Sister.

Python.

And he says back, "Oh yes!" Doesn't he.

Let's have that.

O-H.

Oh yes! Exclamation mark.

Loads of exclamations in our story.

That's how he replied.

Replied, Replied.

The.

Who? Stork.

Full stop.

Let's read it through, shall we? Check it makes sense.

Sister Python was snoozing on a rock.

Her long body was curled around her smooth head.

She slowly raised it.

When she heard the stork.

"Sister python!" said the stork.

"I was wondering if you had any trouble, "you could give me? "Are you sssssure? Said sister python.

"Oh yes!" Replied the stork.

Lovely.

I think I am happy with that.

Now, it's your turn to write your next story section.

Describe your character and then meeting with that first animal friends.

See if you can add in all of those elements from our writing toolkit.

Pause the video now.

While you have a go.

So, here are my sentences that I've just written.

And I hope that you've got yours.

Now that we've written them, it's time for us to have a go at editing them.

As always, we're going to be editing based on our normal criteria.

We're going to be thinking about whether our sentences describe the main inequality of our character.

For our main character, that's going to be their foolishness.

For your new character, you will have decided what their main inequality is.

For my python, it was has slowness and laziness.

Sleepiness.

If I was writing about sister Jackal, I might describe her gentleness and caringness.

If you might have decided that your main character has any number of different main inequalities, you might have decided they're very excitable character, a nervous character, a shy character, whatever you decided, make sure your sentences say that about their character.

Then we're going to do our SAD edit.

We're going to swap, add, or delete things.

That's what I'm going to do now.

So, what can I swap, add or delete this time? Whatever I do.

I want to try and make the snake sound lazier.

And the stork sound more foolish.

So, anything I can swap.

Oh, I've got something.

Said.

I've got the snake saying this, and we have it.

Doesn't give me a clue to how she speaks.

So, I'm going to have her.

I know that she hisses it is because I've got that in my speech.

But I wonder if I can change that said.

Change it to hissed.

Could change it to yawned.

Could change it to anything that isn't lazy.

I'm going to change it to hissed.

Hissed.

Hissed is to python And then I'm going to add yawning on to the end.

Then I get to have both that have to decide.

"Are you sssssure?" Hissed sister python.

Yawning.

Cause she's really tired.

Okay, okay.

How about something I could add now? I think what I'm going to add this time.

I'm going to add a word in about the stork's speech.

One that I didn't put in in lesson eight.

So, I'm going to use that word.

Quickly.

I'm going to add that in.

"Sister python!" Said the stork quickly.

Tells me how he speaks.

Anything to delete today.

Well, I don't think I'm going to today when you're only rushing a little bit.

Sometimes it's not very much that you can delete.

So, yeah, I think I'm okay.

I cooked, I've swapped.

Said for hissed, I've added yawning and quickly.

Cause they are all going to help me establish their characters and yeah, I'm pretty happy.

Now it's your turn.

Finally, it's time to five finger check our sentences.

Make sure that you have capital letters.

Finger spaces.

Spellings.

Full stops.

And that your sentences make sense.

As that's what's going to make our writing really pop.

Pause the video now to have a go at your editing.

Remember to edit for main inner quality, your SAD edit, and your five finger check.

And that's it for lesson nine.

I really hope that your writing is going fantastically and that you're very happy with your description of your new recycled character friend.

In lesson 10, the final lesson of our "Honey and Trouble" unit.

We're going to be finishing off that interaction and maybe even introducing a second animal friend.

Trivia time now.

Our last piece of trivia of our Honey and Trouble" unit.

Today's trivia is about rhinos.

Rhinos could have been one of your chosen animal friends.

Now, northern white rhinos are critically endangered.

That means there is not very many of them left in the world at all.

How many do you think there are left northern white rhinos? How many do you think there are left? How they think? And I will tell you at the start of our final lesson.

Lesson 10.

Bye.