Lesson video

Hello, everyone, my name is Miss Weerasekera.

Welcome to Lesson eight in our unit about Persephone.

In our last lesson, we looked at a different ending from the story of the marriage of Ganesh.

And we use that to understand how writers create satisfying endings.

We're going to be using that plus our knowledge of ending of Persephone to start planning our own ending of Persephone that we're going to write.

I decided today that I really want to start a new hobby, and the new hobby I've picked is watercolour painting.

I used to really like art when I was at school, but often find I don't take time to do it.

So I bought a set of watercolour paints, and I'm going to have a go at doing some painting later.

Maybe in the next lesson, I'll show you some of the things that I've made.

Do you like to paint or do anything creative? In this lesson, you're going to need something to write on like a piece of paper, and a pen or pencil.

You're also going to need your brain.

But you've already got that with you.

Pause the video now if you don't have those things and go and get them, and then press play when you're ready to start.

Fantastic.

Let's get on with it.

In today's lesson, we're going to start with a fun oral game called guess my emotion.

We're then going to go and do a spelling activity.

Then we're going to do our shared write, so we're going to be writing our story ending.

And finally, we're going to do our challenge tasks.

For today, I want us to get used to doing show don't tell sentences, so that we can use them in our writing later.

When we show don't tell an emotion, we describe the behaviours of the character rather than just stating what emotion they're feeling.

So rather than just saying Demeter was sad, we would show what her behaviour is like, what her facial expressions are like, what she sounds like to demonstrate in a more interesting way her emotions to the reader.

I'm going to show you some different emotions.

And I would like you to try and guess which emotion I am showing you.

When you're guessing think about what am I doing with my face? What am I doing with my gestures? And how would we describe that in writing if we were going to include it in our writing data? Okay, I'm going to start.

What do you think that one was? What could that one be? Yes.

What about that one? Can you guess that one? Hopefully you managed to guess all of those emotions.

So at first I was pretty upset and sad, wasn't I? Then I was a bit shocked and surprised, then I was really excited about something.

And then I was feeling pretty sleepy and overtired.

Did you see what I did with my facial expressions and my gestures, sometimes I even made noises or sounds or said things in a certain tone of voice.

All of those things are things we can use in our writing to help us it's much more interesting to describe a character's emotions in that way than it is just to state that they are sad or they are happy.

We can really paint a picture in our readers minds, like we're artists.

Let's have a look at our spelling's.

Can you remember our new spelling rule? And what words can you think of that had a new spelling rule in them? It was all to do with that 'n' sound.

And there were some different ways that we could spell that 'n' sound.

Can you remember? Words like knife and know, you're right it's the 'n' sound that can be spelt with an N, it can be spelt with a K-N, and it can be spelt with it G-N.

Here's some examples underneath night with an N as a nighttime rather than a gallant Knight that would be K-N.

Know which has a K-N and then gnaw which is like when you chew on something, has a G-N.

For our spelling activity today, I have given you the endings of some words and all of these words start with that 'n' sound.

It's going to be your job to decide which spelling of the 'n' sound each of them should have.

As an extra challenge two of the words in here, you could add two different spellings to to make different words.

I wonder if you can spot them, I would like you to pause the video here, have a go at adding the correct 'n' sound spelling to the front of these words, and then press play when you're done.

And we'll look at the answers together.

Great job, let's have a look.

So the first word, this could have two different words depending on the 'n' sound spelling you chose.

So with a K-N it's know.

But with an N, it's now.

It's interesting that it depends which letter you add to the beginning that changes the sound of the O-W to either OW or AW.

The next one we add into N to and it's normal.

The next one is gnome, the next one is gnaw.

Then with knight, again, you can add an N and it could be night like nighttime, or you can KN and it's Knight like a garden Knight who goes on an adventure.

Finally, you can add K-N to itting to make knitting.

Well done if you got those correct.

If you didn't, don't worry, you can correct them now.

As an extra challenge today, I would like you to practise using each of these new spellings in a sentence.

When we want to learn a new spelling, it's best that we try and use it in writing because that helps to really embed it in our memories.

Have a go at this, press pause and then press play, when you have written your sentences.

Great job.

Right, we are going to be writing a new story ending today.

You might remember from lesson six that we were boxing up our ending to help us structure the piece of writing we do today.

I've got mine with me.

If you have one and you know where it is, I'd like you to pause the video here and go and get it and bring it back and press play when you have.

If you haven't done one, don't worry, you can use mine to help us with our writing today.

Okay, we have everything we need to get started.

Now I'm just having a look at my boxing up now and you can have a look at yours with me.

I'm having a look at the pictures to remind me of the main events that I'm going to be writing about today.

I can see that it starts with Hades and Zeus coming to their agreement about Persephone spending six months of the year in the underworld and six months of the year on earth.

Then in the following picture, I can see Persephone returning to her mother Demeter for six months.

And in the following picture, it is summertime reflecting Demeter's happiness at being reunited with Persephone.

After that, I can see that Persephone returns to the underworld with Hades for six months.

As a consequence, then Demeter is very sad and she's alone, and she stops making life on Earth, and it becomes winter.

In the final box, it was that lesson that the reader was learning that we realised that the mood that Demeter had was reflected in the seasons.

So when she was sad or angry, it was winter.

And when she was happy, and back with Persephone it was summer.

If you need to have a little recap of your boxing up, you can pause the video now and look through it carefully until you feel like you're ready to start your writing.

Fantastic.

Let's get on with it.

In our shared write today, I need you to be ready to, write down notes as you go.

Answer my questions with creativity.

Throughout this, I'm going to be asking you questions and asking you to make choices about words you might want to use or things that you might want to describe.

I want you to use your amazing imaginations and have your brain switched on and ready to go.

Also, remember that if you feel like you're getting behind, or you need a little bit of time to do some thinking or writing, then just pause the video, and you can press play when you're ready to continue.

If you don't have your paper or pen and pencil ready, I would like you to quickly pause the video and go and get it now.

And then press play when you're ready to start writing.

In shared write, I'm going to try and include these things and I'm going to need you to help me out with them.

I want to write in third person, which means I'm not using I or me.

I want to write in the past tense about things that have already happened.

I want to show don't tell the emotion so I want to describe how the characters are feeling rather than just stating it.

I'm going to try and use a mixture of long and short sentences to build suspense.

I'm going to use adjectives for descriptive language, powerful verbs and adverbs, and hopefully some possessive apostrophes that we did in our grammar lesson earlier this unit too.

Let's get started.

Okay, so before I start writing I am going to write to the unit and the lesson and the title for today's lesson.

So I'm going to put unit 13.

Lesson eight at the top.

To write an ending showing consequences.

Okay, so I'm going to be using my boxing up from lesson six to help me so just remember if you've got yours use it to help you too.

If not, I'm going to be going through this as well so you can use mine too.

The first picture is when Hades and Zeus have their discussion and they reach an agreement about what they're going to do with Persephone based on the pomegranate seeds that she has eaten.

So I'm going to start by saying Zeus went to talk to Hades.

Now, how do we think Zeus went to talk to Hades? How is he feeling at this point? He's already been to Demeter plead with her to start making life on earth and she said no.

And now he's probably quite infuriated, isn't he? Because he's having to go down to the underworld to speak to Hades to try and get her back.

And he's the king of gods, he probably feels he shouldn't have to be going around begging people to do things.

Perhaps they should listen to him.

So perhaps he's quite irritated.

So Zeus went to talk to Hades and we wanted to show don't tell, don't we? So how could we show that he is feeling irritated and angry? I'm going to say with a furrowed brow like he's frowning and clenched fists.

Okay, so I'm showing that he's feeling agitated and angry rather than just saying he was irritated, he was angry.

Okay.

Now when he gets there, I'm going to use inverted commas to put around the speech that's used what does Zeus say to Hades? I think he's going to say something quite demanding, aren't he? You must let Persephone go and I'm going to use explanation and close my inverted commas there.

Okay, let's think about how he said that, I want you to use powerful verbs, don't I? I'm going to say demanded Zeus I'm going to say sternly that's my adverb to describe how he said it.

Demanded Zeus sternly.

Okay.

Now I'm just going to explain what happened.

Oh, sorry, I just missed a line there, or everything on earth will die.

Zeus has an idea, doesn't he? That Persephone shouldn't have to stay unless she's eaten food from that place.

So he's going to say, you cannot keep her here unless she has eaten food from this place.

Okay, and two of my inverted commas, now we know Hades response to this, it's quite irritating, isn't it? Because he realises that Persephone has in fact, eaten something doesn't he? So we might say Hades raised his eyebrows, what else might he do if he's happy? Yeah, that's a good idea, he might smile.

Hades raised his eyebrows, and a wicked, we'll use an adjective, smile spread across his face.

Okay.

Fantastic now he's going to reply because he's a new character.

I'm going to start his fifth speech on the next.

on a new line.

Okay, so he's going to tell Zeus now, isn't he? That she's eating pomegranate seeds, so she has to stay.

She has eaten six pomegranate seeds, so she must stay.

I'm going say, Hades replied.

How might he say that let's think of an adverb for how Hades might reply to Zeus? Perhaps he's feeling quite gleeful, quite sly, I wonder what you'll choose.

I'm going to say slyly like a fox.

Okay now we know that this is going to surprise Zeus, isn't it? He thought he had it all figured out, but he's going to have to come up with a new plan.

So he's going to be thinking deeply, let's think about what do people do when they are thinking deeply? They might rub their chin or scratch their head.

What else might they do? I wonder if perhaps the thunderbolt that he's holding might start to spark whilst he's thinking deeply.

And perhaps then we could use one of our possessive apostrophes.

So I might say here, Zeus's thunderbolt started to spark as he thought deeply is my adverb about what to do next.

Now when he finally realises that he's got a plan, he's got a compromise, what do you think he might do? Kind of thing when you've got a really good idea, what might you do? Yeah, that's a good idea.

Yes, we could say.

I might say all of a sudden Zeus cheered and his eyes opened wide.

Let me start a new line because Zeus is going to be talking.

If she has eaten six seeds, she will stay with you for six months and then return for six months.

I'm going to say Zeus stated, I going to say this as my adverb, confidently.

How do you think he would say it? Okay, so we've done.

I mean to be honest, this bit takes up quite a lot of time, doesn't it, just to get to the agreement.

So now I'm going to start a new paragraph, because I'm going to do this bit, this paragraph in the ending that describes all of this learning, okay? The fact that we know Persephone returns to Demeter and therefore it's summer, and when Persephone returns to Hades, it becomes winter, then what we learn.

So that's all going to come in the next paragraph.

I'm going to turn over to a new page, so you can see that nice and clearly.

Okay, so I'm going to write, start off this final paragraph.

So from that day to this Persephone spends half of the year on earth with her mother during this time, Demeter.

How does Demeter feel when Persephone is with her? Was it sad, or was it happy? You're right, it was happy and how can we show that? During this time, Demeter is full of joy and warmth.

Everything grows and the sun shines.

This is the time we call Summer.

Fantastic.

Now we have to think about this bit, okay? Now I'm going to write for the other half of the year Persephone returns to the underworld.

Now, Demeter cries her heart out, everything dies and it becomes cold and frozen on Earth.

Okay, so what you can see here that I've said instead of just saying Demeter is sad, I'm saying she cries her heart out, and therefore everything dies, it becomes cold and frozen on earth.

And we're going to write, this is the time we call Winter.

Okay, so for that paragraph, I talked about how Persephone returns, it becomes Summer.

Persephone leaves and goes to the underworld, it becomes winter.

And within that I have explained, this is the time we call winter which is the learning for the reader.

This is the time we call summer.

Okay, now it's your turn to use your notes and your amazing brain to write your own version of the story ending of Persephone.

Some things to remember, we're writing in the third person, so that means we're not being any of the characters we're not using I or me, we're writing in the third person.

We're writing in the past tense, because these are events that have already happened.

So often, this means that we add -ed to the end of the verbs that we use, not all of them.

But that helps us to remember, we're going to do our show don't tell.

Remember all the emotions I was showing you at the beginning in our oral game.

How can you describe someone's emotions, rather than just telling the reader about them.

Remember to use a mixture of long and short sentences to create suspense and to make it interesting to read.

Lots of descriptive language with amazing adjectives if you can.

Powerful verbs and adverbs describe the action of the story.

And also remember our possessive apostrophes that we looked at earlier in the unit.

If you're going to say that an item belongs to someone, for example, Demeter's daughter, it would be apostrophe S after Demeter before daughter.

You can press pause here and have a go at your writing.

Remember, if you need to go back and have a look at the shared write to help you whilst you're doing it, please do.

Once you finish, you can press play.

Oh my goodness, what an amazing piece of writing.

I think you might have written that ending better than even the original author.

Well done.

Okay, for a quick challenge task to finish us off today, it says, can you read your ending with an expressive voice, facial expressions and body language? So I'd like you to stand up and find a space in the room and imagine you are telling the story to someone.

If you can get yourself a real audience of someone that you live with, you could perform it to them.

If not, you could just find a doll or Teddy to be your audience.

Press play once you've had a go at doing that.

Oh my goodness, you spoke that so beautifully.

I'm really impressed.

You have done so much incredible work today and you should be very, very proud of yourself.

I would really love to see your pieces of writing.

So if you want to share it, please ask a parent or carer to take a photo and put it on Facebook, Twitter or Instagram.

You can tag at Oak national and use the hashtag Learn with Oak.