Lesson video

Hello, everybody, it is Mrs. Hardisty for your English lesson for today, we are going to start writing our explanation text today by writing an opening and the first paragraph of the process of chocolate making.

So when you're ready, let's begin.

This is what we're going to cover in today's lesson, we're going to learn a few more fun facts about chocolate most precisely about the pods and the beans.

And then we're going to read an opening introduction and pick out what makes it really successful.

And then we're going to write our own opening introduction, and then our first paragraph about the growing.

So for today's lesson, you will need paper and pencil and your plans for the opening and you're growing paragraphs so do make sure that you have got your plans there to help you, and your paper and pencil.

Let's start with our fun facts.

So one person can harvest an estimated 650 pods per day.

That is a lot of machete chopping, isn't it? And in many countries, cocoa can be harvested at any time of the year, because the pods ripen at different times and you can see this, on the tree just in front of us.

We've got pods of different sizes and colours because they're ripening, at different times.

So there is one harvest season.

They can be harvested throughout the year.

Each cocoa tree produces approximately 2500 beans.

Wow! what a lot of beans just one tree.

Let's now look at our opening introduction.

So what are introductions for? Introductions, tell the reader general information and hooks them in to read more.

We thought a little bit about this when we were planning our introduction, and now we're going to flesh it all out.

I've got two examples here of an introduction.

Both of them, tell their reader a little bit about an explanation text on chocolate, but you can see one is much more effective and precise than the other.

See if you can work out why this is so.

Example a.

This text will tell you about how squirmy chocolate is made.

This process is really awesome.

Read on to find out more about how beans turn into bars.

And then b.

Chocolate is one of the world's most popular mouthwatering treats.

Over 700,000 tonnes of chocolate are eaten every year in the UK alone.

Have you ever wondered how it is made? Making chocolate is a long multi step process.

It starts in the cocoa farms where the beans are grown and harvested.

Then, it moves to chocolate making factories, where they are roasted, ground mixed and moulded.

So I'm sure you can tell me shouts out which one was better, was it A or B? So the problem with A, is that not just that it was shorter, but that the language was too informal.

So we had words like scrummy, and awesome.

And although they are really exciting adductors, they're not appropriate, to a formal explanation text.

And also, we had this sentence about being turned from beans into bars, which is true, but actually, in my introduction, I need to find out about the different stages so that my reader knows what's going to happen as they carry on reading.

So let's now look at example B in a bit more detail.

This is our success criteria.

Remember, these are our checklist of things to include in our writing to make it really accessible.

So we are going to use this success criteria, and see if I've included everything I should have done in my example.

So number one, I've used a question.

Number two, I've listed the main stages of the process.

And number three, I have included an interesting fact.

So I've already read this example out to you.

So I'd like you to now see if you can pick out the question.

Have I used a question? Can you point to it? Can you call that out? There it is.

So in the middle I've got Have you ever wondered how it is made? I haven't started with a question.

You might want to start with a question when you come to write yours.

I've included a kind of general fact about chocolate, and then, I've put in my question a.

Chocolate's really interesting.

Have you ever wondered how it is made? Okay, so great.

I've got success criteria number one a question.

Can you now see if you can spot where I've listed the main stages of the process? Well, that's I've got the grown and harvested in my penultimate my sentence before my last one.

And then I've got the roasted ground mixed and moulded in my last sentence, so my reader knows what I'm going to be describing.

Okay, lastly, can you find the interesting fact? point to it.

Where is my interesting fact? That's it so I've got my fat about how much chocolate we eat in the UK, here in my second sentence.

So now we're going to have a goat writing our own opening together.

Look at your plan.

Now make sure it's where you can see easily.

Here's my plan, which hopefully looks quite similar to yours, so that you know what questions starters you want, what fun facts you want to include, what adjectives you want to include in your writing to have your plan ready.

So I've started already with my title, which I written and underlined in the middle of my page of how a chocolate is made.

And now I can continue with the introduction.

So I want to begin by explaining what chocolate is.

So I know that it's a food, I know that it's quite a treat.

I want to describe what it tastes like.

So it's sweet.

Can you think of a word, it's sugary, it's delicious.

So let me use those words now.

Chocolate is a sweet, and then I want to use another adjective.

So I'm going to use a comma, a sweet comma, delicious treat.

And it's eaten everywhere, isn't it? So I can say that is eaten or perhaps that it's enjoyed, which one should I choose, enjoyed.

That is enjoyed all over the world.

And I finished with a full stop.

Chocolate is a sweet, delicious treat that is enjoyed all over the world.

And now I can use my questions so I can tick off my first success criteria.

So I could use did you know or have you ever wondered.

Have you ever wondered? And now I can say have you ever wondered how it is made or even how it is produced? How it is produced? And I'm going to have a question mark here because it's a question.

Have you ever wondered how it is produced? Now we can start to list the stages which is my success criteria number two.

So it starts with or it begins with with cocoa and I'm going to say pods to start with so cocoa pods being grown and harvested and were they harvested? on family farms. Now, I could have in my interesting fact.

So I could have about the fact that the first recorded use of those cocoa beans and pods was by the Olmec people.

So I can start my sentence with one of those formal conjunctions from my plan.

Interestingly, and then I need to have what after it? a comma.

The first recorded use of cocoa beans.

The first recorded use of cocoa beans.

When was it was it? It was in 1500 BC by the.

And I want to write all met with a capital letter because it's a proper noun, by the Olmec people.

Because this is so interesting.

Instead of a full stop, I want to use another type of punctuation.

I can use an exclamation mark.

Let me read that through.

Interestingly, comma, the first recorded use of cocoa beans was in 1500 BC by the Olmec people.

And now I can list the other stages.

So after the beans are harvested, comma, because it's a subordinate clause that I can talk about the moving to the factories.

They are moved to factories where they are now you need to list the other stages they are roasted.

And because it's a list I need commas.

Roasted, ground, mixed.

Now this is my last part of the list instead of using a comma and going to use the word and mix and mould it.

And I want to continue to show that it's to form chocolate to form the chocolate we all eat.

Okay, and now I want to get my reader to carry on reading by using one of those interesting adjectives to describe the process.

So read on to find out more about this.

And we could have fascinating, interesting, multi step or I like multi-step and fascinating multi-step, comma, fascinating process.

Let me read through that last little bit.

After the beans are harvested, comma, they are moved to factories where they are roasted, comma, ground comma, mixed and moulded to form the chocolate we all eat.

Read on to find out more about this multi-step comma, fascinating process.

Lovely, I've got a question.

I've listed the main stages, and I've included an interesting fact.

Can you now pause your video, and write your own introduction and title.

Brilliant! So turn on our opening paragraph and now we're going to write our paragraph all about the growing stage.

Again, make sure you've got your plan for this paragraph really close to you so that you can tick off all the different things that you've got in your plan and make sure you have that in your writing.

And here are a success criteria for writing this paragraph.

Number one, I've written in the present tense.

An example of that is where you've got pods are chopped.

Number two, I've used a range of conjunctions to link events.

So that could be for more causal conjunctions.

It could be and and but conjunctions, but we want to use a range of them.

And then number three, I have used subject specific vocabulary.

So I've got my subheading already written out and underlined.

Where does chocolate come from? And now I can start my first sentence.

And in my plan, I said I wanted to start a sentence with before so I'm going to do that now.

So before chocolate is made, and now I need some punctuation.

What do I need? I need a comma, because it's an ordinate clause.

Before chocolate is made, and then I can talk about the beans.

Cocoa beans must be grown and harvested.

And where are they grown? they're grown on family farms. This usually, takes place on, family farms. Lovely! And now I can write about where these family farms are located around the world.

I want to use that word located.

So these farms are usually located where? I want to use this really precise adjectives, tropical, humid areas.

In tropical, humid areas.

And then I can add exactly where it is in my brackets for actual information.

So I opened my brackets, so West Africa, Central and Southern America.

And then I can close my brackets.

and then I want to say why because this is where they grow the best.

So I'm going to use my because so comma because these areas have the best conditions for growing and I finished with a full stop.

Let me read through that first sentence.

These farms are usually located in tropical, comma, humid areas West Africa, Central and Southern America comma, because these areas have the best conditions for growing.

And then I want to talk about this the size and the shape.

So I want to talk about the pod scrape up the tree.

So, cocoa pods, and then I can put in now my relative clause starting with a which, which are the size and shape of a rugby ball.

And then I have another comma.

So, cocoa pods comma, which are the size and shape of rugby ball.

And where do they grow? grow up the trunk of the tree.

And then I can talk about the machetes as my last sentence.

So once they are ripe farmers chop them down with machetes.

So let me just check against my success criteria.

Have I written in the present tense? So I've got farms are located and then I've got farmers chop them down.

Yes, I've written in the present tense.

Have I used a range of conjunctions? I've got before, I've got once, Yes, I have.

And have I used subject specific vocabulary? I've got tropical, I've got a humid, I've got machete.

So now it's your turn to write your paragraph about them growing.

Can you pause the video and write yours? Well done everyone.

Let's have a recap of what we have done in today's lesson.

So we learned some more chocolate fun facts, this time about cocoa pods.

And then we read an opening introduction, we thought about what made it successful.

And then we use those ideas to write our own opening introduction.

And then finally, we wrote our first paragraph about the growing stage.

Wonderful writing you have done so well.

You have worked really hard today.

I'm really looking forward to working with you again soon.

Bye bye.